I NEVER TOLD MY FRIENDS

Originally Posted By JamieI agree I told everyone about my adoption plan.They still love me even though I thought that they wouldnt.They think that my plan is a positive thing for my child & they dont treat me any different.If people say negative things,avoid those people.They are the ones with the problem that doesnt put a childs safty & stability first.You will run into a couple people like this.You can never please everyone no matter what choice we make.

Originally Posted By CarrieI totally agree, being open and honest about everything makes the whole ordeal that much easier to deal with. I was ashamed of letting myself get into that situation, but not ashamed of my daughter or my decision to do what was best for her. I think to hide it or lie about it would only have given me one more thing to hurt about...one more hill to climb.At the beginning, I really didn't have a choice...see I work in a hospital, news travels fast there!!! I took a preg test from the ER and watched it turn positive...with an audience of friends. I knew I had to tell my mom fast...she too works at the same hospital and would be devistated to hear it from someone else. She was shocked...but told me she was 100% behind me, whatever I chose to do. With everyone knowing I was preg, I lost all privacy with any choice I made.I happened onto adoption because of two reasons...I had only been with the father for a month and we weren't sure we could do it...and my mother had a son she had placed 20some years ago and suggested I think about it...so that got the ball rolling.My co-workers began congratulating me...calling me MOM, asking me about names, wanting to rub my tummy...things I didn't need to hear, things that hurt to hear. I knew I had to put a stop to it. I began to inform people of my decision. I told them with confidence and pride. The responses were almost worth doing again!! There were those shallow minded people that stopped talking to me all together, and then there were those that grabbed me, hugged me, and told me they were there for me. This was a time I really needed to know who my true friends were...and it worked out that way.With everything out in the open...the support and love I got was phenomenal!! My girlfriends threw me a "not quite so baby shower" where they brought gifts for me-not baby things. I had so many shoulders to cry on, it seemed I didn't have enough tears! When she was born, that support continued...I had visitors just about every 10 minutes (I delivered in the hospital I work at), and it was nice, it felt good to know, they were there for me, not the baby. It has been 6 weeks now since my daughter was placed, my boyfriend (bfather) and I are still together and getting on with our lives (though he hasn't told his family or coworkers). When people who know me well enough to know I was pregnant, but not well enough to know about the adoption, ask how the baby was doing, I smile and tell them, "she is doing great...she is at home with her parents."Please feel free to Email me CarrieAnne1229@hotmail.comI would love to hear more stories...or if you want someone to share your feelings with...I could use that too!

i am curious to both nikki and carrie's situation. nikki-your story sounds very much l;ike my birth moms story. she as well came to florida to give me up for adoption and told some of those she knew that iot was for tests etc. and carrie-ur story sounds much like my moms and her history that i have just recently found out. i dont know when either of u two had all of this going on but i do see the irony in both of your stories. please email me so i can share my story and information i have on my birth mom. Angelicbeauty823@aol.com

nikki-can you please give me some information on where, when, and how old you were when u gave ur daughter up for adoption? your story sounds similar to my birth moms and im curious to find out. thank you

When I was 17 I was pregnant and gave my son up for adoption to a wonderful family. My friends shared the experience with me, though they were young as well and it was a first for them. We were all in High School. I remember them visiting me in the hospital after the birth and it was important to me that they were there. It opened their eyes to something new and scary....like I was their poster child of what not to do...hahaha...it all turned out good...but I am thankful that they knew... I couldn't do it without their love and my parents Carmen

[FONT=Comic Sans MS]Not all my friends know yet but they all well know at X-miss I'm sending out birth annousmets in my X-miss card... My mother thinks its a bad Idea that no one needs to know about my Hope... BUT I think that the world should know how wonderfuls she is... And how happy I was that I could give a famliy something they thought they could never have...[/FONT]