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I'm new to this forum, but came here to get some suggestions as to what I should do. I found out a little over a month ago that I am pregnant. This is an unexpected pregnancy that was not planned. I am in my second year of college and still live with my parents. When I told my boyfriend about the pregnancy, he did not take it well. He decided he wanted to put our baby up for adoption one day after I told him. At first I was totally against the entire idea of putting our baby up for adoption, but after a month of thinking about it seems like it would be the right and best thing to do for the baby. I'm not able to support myself now let alone myself and a baby. I am lucky enough to have very supporting parents, they have told me that they will help me and support whatever I decide. If I keep the baby, they'll help me the best they can. Financially, my parents or doing ok, but helping me raise my baby would definately put stress on them. My boyfriend broke up with me, and refuses to think of this pregnancy as a reality that is going right now, and doubts that I really am pregnant. Right now, I don't have any real desire to keep the baby, maybe that will all change further in the pregnancy, but I'm just not ready, and I don't feel that my child should have to suffer for my mistakes. All I want is the VERY best for my baby. Woud I be doing the right thing by putting my baby up for adoption? I'm having to make this decision alone without the support of my ex-boyfrind, and would like to have advice and other people's opinion on this. Thanks.
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I was in your same situation, back in August. As soon as I found out I was pregnant I had no idea what to do. The only thing different is that I thought adoption was the best idea and he did not and so we broke up. But, I am now having second thoughts on the adoption. I am only 21 weeks, but, I have time to think, and so do you. Try to think of what is best for the child and no matter what you decide, that is what will be best. I live at home too and my parents are being supportive too, so I am glad to hear that your parents are being so supportive as well. I wish you luck with whatever you decide.
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Well, you've discovered your pregnancy early on so you have time, which is good. I'd really recommend you get in touch with an unbiased professional in adoption. I've heard many good things about Brenda Romanchik at Open Adoption Insight. She's not an agency, she's an educator and a birthmom. Google the name, you'll find her site on the Web. She also participates in these forums. There aren't going to be any easy answers for you, and expect to feel differently every day. Remember though you have many options, and the right to change your mind at any time up until you sign parental right termination papers (and any post-signing time has passed). Best of luck. Regina, AMom to Ryan Joshua Thomas PS if anyone contacts you in PM or e-mail wanting you to make an adoption plan with them, please do report them to the moderators. It's very against the TOS.
HI...I CAN RELATE..BUT FOR ME IT WAS 36 AND 34 YEARS AGO. I TOO WAS PG FROM MY BOYFRIEND. FIRST HE WANTED TO GET MARRIED..HIS PARENTS SAID NO. I CARRIED ON WITHOUT HIM. I HAD A LITTLE GIRL. MY FAMILY WAS VERY SUPPORTIVE PHYSCALLY .....NOT EMOTIONALLY. THEN I SAW HIM AGAIN...THEN PG AGAIN! AGAIN I HAD A LITTLE GIRL. I THANK THE LORD I KEPT MY BABYS. I LISTEN TO THE PAIN INVOLVED IN RELEASSING A CHILD FOR ADOPTION....AND IT RIPES MY HEART OUT. AND YES..THERE ARE ALL KINDS OF WONDERFUL PEOPLE WHO WOULD WANT TO ADOPT YOUR BABY ...AND GIVE HIM OR HER A GREAT LIFE. BUT......YOUR THE MOMMY...WHAT DO YOU WANT? YOU WILL KNOW...AFTER DELIVERY WHAT YOUR CHOICE WILL BE....FOLLOW YOUR HEART. YOU WILL KNOW THE BEST THING TO DO....HUGS JANET
Hi, I just wanted to thank everyone who has responded to my post. You have all given me alot to think about and to consider. I am going to take time and think about both putting my baby up for adoption or keeping it; and try to out weigh the good and bad things about each one until I find out what the best thing is going to be for my baby. Thanks again! I appreciate it! :)
Make a plan for each option. Consider what goals you have in mind for yourself & your child. Consult anyone you know who has single-parented. Don't make a final decision until after the baby is born. You won't really know how you will feel until the baby is a reality. Pray for divine direction. Good luck.
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Adoption is a wonderful thing for an unplanned pregnancy. Although I gave up my parental rights to my son, I still receive pictures and am allowed to visit him. He was born in August 2002, and I couldn't be happier about my choice. I was 15 and not ready to be a mother. His family also has another boy that was adopted in 1996. His birthmother was in her 20s and out of college, but she did not want to be a single mother. Adoption gives the child a chance to live a life and for you to continue yours without the struggles of being in a tough situation. And some people chose to keep their adoption closed, but I am very happy that mine is open because I have the chance to still be a part of his life and know how he is. Down the road I won't be wondering what he looks like or what he's doing with his life, and he can ask me all the questions he wants.
Hi, I just wanted to update anyone who is interested in what I decided to do. I've decided to keep my baby!! I'm lucky enough to have a very supportive family who is willing to help me through this time. I wouldn't be able to do this without them!! I know it's not going to be easy, but I'm truly happy with my decision. Thanks again to everyone who has replied to my post. You all have given great advice and support. Good luck to all.
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hey i am only 18 and im in my last month of pregnancy. i am due the 16th of august and my boyfriend told me that if i dont give it up for adoption that he would break up with me. my dad told me taht he thinks i should keep it and would be tehre for me and help me the best as he could. i was thinking about adoption at first and then he said he would take it into custody to help me and i was all excited becuase i get to keep my baby but its a hard decision because i will be a single parent at 18 and now i am almost having second thoughts because im scared to do it on my own kind of thing and i gotta think fast. but i just say do what you think is right, do what you feel is best for you and your baby. decide by how you feel in your heart thats what i am doing. i am thinking if i keep it its because i know i can give it the love it deserves and much more and if i gave it up for adoption i would basically be doing it becuase of the pressure of my boyfriend. so do waht you feel in your heart
ha, sorry i didnt see that you have made your choice. thats awesome that you are goin to keep it. i know you will give it the love it needs and deserves. noone else can love your baby as much as you do, its yours:) . thats also awesome that you have very supporting parents. i am lucky for that to. good luck with everything