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Hi There,
I am brand new here today. I have been loking around the messages and watching every adoption and related show on tv and reading every article about it for about 4 years now.
We have been unable to act on anything since living in the states because my husband did not have citizenship yet. We are Australian. Now we do....yea!!! We have tried the invitro thing and have spent a great deal trying to get pregnant again. To no avail. Adoption is the next step. Now for the questions. My husband who is adopted into a beautiful family so it is quite close to our hearts in a very positive way. My brother is also adopted. He is a cutey pie but that is another show. How do I go about adoption. I cannot afford to pay the very high prices of some of the agencies I have seen on the web. We have way overspent trying already. This brings me to the fostering question. I think this may be a way to get another little one into the family. We have one beautiful 6 1/2 year old daughter. She is the apple of our eyes . I have even wondered how I would ever be able to love another as much as I do her. All my friends have told me this happens naturally. We live in Arizona in Scottsdale if anyone knows the area.
what experiences have you had with fostering and adoption. Ther must be mothers out there that are pregnant and do not want to go through all the adoption agencies. How do you get a look in there. Who would I write to. We want to adopt or foster up to about 3-4 yr so that Isabelle still maintains her status in the family of the older child. She asks for a little sister everytime all the time . She said grace at the table the other night and asked for a " sister ....or at least a puppy" OK so she is only six....
I hope someone is interested in reading all of this. Looking forward to replies.
I tried to put a photo of my cutie in there. Not sure if I did it right though.
Sandy
HUZHU
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Your daughter is beautiful!
In your post when you are talking about fostering you say you can't imagine loving another child like you do your daughter. I don't have any biological children, but I have had 3 foster children. One has been returned to his family, one is about to be returned to his family, and we have a little girl who we are in the process of adopting from fostering. While I don't have any bios, I can tell you this, I can't imagine any mother loving their children more than I love these three angels that have come into our life.
Our first little boy, baby J came to us at 5 days old. To my eternal heartbreak, he went to live with his father when he was 3 months old. I can't imagine how any biological mother could have loved a child more than I loved baby J. Fostering is the hardest thing I have ever done, but also the most rewarding. When J came to us he was sick and skinny and drug addicted. I gave them back a happy, healthy, chubby, developmentally advanced 3 month old. He was trusting and loving and secure. I have to believe his life will be better because of the time he spent with us.
We now have a 19 month old who has been with us for 6 months but will be going home soon. The thought of him leaving breaks my heart, but we were here when he needed someone. We helped him through this time of crisis in his life.
Our baby girl came to us at 6 days old. She is now 6 months old and her adoption will be final this summer. She is the light of our lives. I love this baby with everything that is in me.
My mother is the grandmother to 8 biological grandchildren. She tells me after now having been foster "Nana" to our 3 foster children that she realizes that loving a baby has nothing to do with biology.
Fostering is hard, but also very rewarding. If you think you would be able to love and let go of a few while you are waiting for the right one to come into your family forever, than maybe fostering is for you.
Good luck!
Jessica
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As a mother of 2 bio (son 19 and daughter 17) who has gone through IVF, 2 ectopics, a failed private adoption, has an adopted husband (no, I didn't adopt him, his adoptive parents did LOL) and are now hoping to adopt our foster to adopt baby girl who is 2 1/2 , I would defintely recommend fostering to adopt to everyone. Granted, there is a chance you will be heartbroken. In order to want children, you have to love them. If you love children, then some of the stories you hear about these poor children that are removed from their families and placed into foster care will break your heart. When a child is sent home, a part of your heart breaks. The other part should rejoice that the child is going to be back with his/her family. We all know not all of these children should be sent home. We just have to pray and ask GOD to watch over these innocents and protect them. While you may have 10 children sent back home, when you finally get that child that "stays" and is finally going to be yours, it is all worth it. GOD lead my husband and I too foster to adopt in 2001. We got into it quite selfishly. We have been trying for 10 years to have a baby. I had secondary infertility. Then when I did get pregnant, I either miscarried or I lost three babies to 2 different ectopic pregnancies. My husband and I used all of our income tax every year to either pay for IVF cycles, or for private adoptions that fail through because the birthmother decided to parent. Then GOD sent us into PATH through our state of TN foster program. We had to do it, because we were still trying to adopt the baby that we had prepared for 8 months to adopt before the girl changed her mind.The child was removed 2 weeks after the baby's birth and placed in foster care. Since the baby was in another state from us (Louisiana) we had to go through and become foster parents to try and get "our son" placed with us. It was not to be. However, we finished our PATH training and became foster/foster to adopt parents at the end of OCT 2001 and had the baby girl placed with us Feb. 1, 2002. We were clled on her 30 minutes prior to her birth. The child had been taken into protective custody due to the birthmother's conviction of 2 counts of severe child abuse. We have no doubt that "our baby" would either be injured for lie or even killed at the hands of this woman. The bfather doesn't beleive that this woman ever hurt her children, so he would ut this child in her care and harm's way if he were to get custody of this child. We just pray everyday that GOD will take care of this baby and do his will. Even the family memebrs that have been contacted to take this baby have said no due to the nature of these "birthparents" and the way they would be with the family members. These relatives all said to leave her where he she is. Family knows best. All you can do is ask GOD to lead you. Think of all these children have been through and just be there for them in their time of need, no matter the outcome. We are adults. While it may hurt us if our "children" are sent back home, we have made a huge difference in that child's life. Maybe that parent was so mad that day that the child was removed that the parent could've hurt that child permanently. The state steps in, removes the child , the parents get help with their anger or substance abuse or whatever the problem may be. We at least know that child is safe that night. Maybe that parent gets his/her life together and learns how to manage things, then that child needs to be back with their parent. That child is going to love that parent REGARDLESS what that parent has done to him/her. Sooner or later GOD is going to send that child(ren) that will never be returned to the parent. That child can be yours. It is well worth the wait. Sorry I get to going and can't stop. I know your eyes are probably crossing by now. Just remember fostering/fostering to adopt is a very rewarding and life learning experience and it doesn't cost anything financially, just the price of a heart.