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I have been with my fiancee for 4 + years, and we are getting married this spring. Her daughter was 7 months old when we started dating and has grown very close to me. She has asked me on many occasions if I will be her daddy and often cries at night when I have to go home. the biological father is NOT on the birth certificate and has never paid child support. However, he does have contact with her (sees her only 8-10 time a year even though he lives in the same city-in California) Not coincidentally, his level of "involvement" has grown since the little girl continues to insist I am her father as well.
I very much want to adopt her but am afriad that is not possible since I am sure he will not consent. We are open to him still being part of her life if she wants him to be but I want to know that I am legally her father. Should we not press the child support issue and use it as part of our case or should we try to get him to start paying since he has very little money and this may open his eyes to the cost he can avoid by consent to adoption?
There are so many options, any ideas?
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I am so not a expert on this advice but here is what I think and know.
Unless you can get the BIO to consent then I don't think you can adopt. I also think you have to be married for 1 year first (I have been told this but I could be wrong) before you can try to adopt. All you can pray is that the BIO steps down and stops seeing the child so your fiance can file for abandonment.
Why isn't he paying child support? Is it because he isn't on the BC? Has there been a paternity test proving him as the BIO?
Good Luck,
Colleen
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