Anybody have the Panama Questionnaire in Word format?

Well, I gotta vent now. I went to get the new copy of the questionnaire our agency mailed us this week and it was missing. I was gonna scan it and type the answers in, in case I couldn't get it emailed to me. And it was gone. Called Derek at work and he took it with him to fill out again, by hand. And he messed it up again, and now is brushing it off like the mistakes are no big deal. He filled out the first one, too, with me sitting there. He messed that one up bigtime and I thought "no big deal, I'll just get another copy" (it was nice to see him actually fill something out for a change). I had wanted to make some changes on my portion regarding my family medical history and he didn't know that. I wanted to expound on some things we just vaguely answered on the rough draft, too. WHY after all this time of making me do all this paperwork by myself does he get a wild hair and pick THIS document to put his hands on??????? I have had to create a file folder titled "sign here" for him and leave it on the counter by his keys, that's how uninvolved he's been during most of this paperchase. And he picks the most important paper to touch. I just burst into tears and he hung up on me. Ok, so I probably overreacted. But we're meeting with our agent Monday. So this needed to be DONE and DONE RIGHT! Guess I got what I asked for because all along I've given him heck for not taking a more active role in the paperwork, parent education, or researching process of this adoption. (Yes, he wants to adopt very badly, he just leaves all the legwork to me in all matters that have to do with paperwork, bill-paying, making appointments, etc). I have accused him that I felt like am the one adopting, that he's just financing it and expects me to be *the parent* and he's gonna get to be *the playmate*. Ugh, open mouth, insert foot. Just can't believe it. WHY NOW???? WHY THIS??? Suppose I should be grateful and not whine. He says it's not the end of the world, which I know it's not except sometimes I feel like our caseworker wants nothing to do with Panamanian adoptions so the less I have to ask for stuff, the better I feel. I'll calm down. This just happened within the last few minutes. I just needed to have a meltdown and get it out of my system. Anyone else want to share stories about their paperchasing? Any funny or aggravating stories about their spouses or anything? When I was undergoing fertility treatments, I used to joke that when we finally had a baby, he/she'd be automatically grounded for being so stubborn getting here. I think once we adopt little Evan, he will be grounded too! ;) Ok OK, before I even get the chance to submit this post, I have a praise report! A wonderful buddy here just saved my marriage and emailed me the questionnaire! :) Yahooooooooo! Thank you! Mucho better already! Robin

Sheesh, Robin! Deep breath....one more time...DEEP BREATH.... There, do you feel more calm now? When you start to panic like this, try a thing called "Square Breathing." You inhale for 4 seconds, hold your breath for 4 seconds, exhale for 4 seconds, and hold for 4 more...Then inhale for 4, hold for 4... You get the idea. It works! It slows your heart rate (blood pressure) and calms you down. I read this somewhere as a great cure for "Road Rage," but I also have my students do it before they give their speeches, since their hearts are racing. :) Meanwhile, take heart and realize that this is the typical behavior of the less-than-enthusiastic partner in most relationships. Usually there is one person who is driving the adoption (checking out agencies, making phone calls, etc.), and the other is along for the ride. This has a lot to do with personality, but also may show that your hubby is confident in your ability to make important decisions and handle important details. (It may also be that he is more of a big-picture person and hates getting caught in the details, and you could be more a detail/organizational hound, and hate "fuzzy ideas" and "creativity" when it comes to getting a project done. (There are tons of online personality tests that show this if you and your hubby are ever bored. It sure explains alot about family differences!) ;) Rebecca