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We're a multi-racial family, and something I find extremely important that people either deny or treat as a negative is that a multi-racial family isn't normal. I'm half-Italian and half-Mexican American, my spouse is white, my oldest two children are white, and my youngest is African American and Caucasian. We are not the norm; there's no use denying it, but NORMAL DOES NOT EQUAL HEALTHY! Being a racist, technically, sadly, is normal. Misogyny is normal. Prejudices of all sorts are normal. Be thankful our families are healthy and functional, not normal!
Prose...I am 1/2 of a transracial couple; my husband is Caucasion and I am African American. I posted to officially say that I respectfully disagree with your post and if it wasn't so laughable I'd be offended...MissyM :confused: :rolleyes: :confused:
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rrrrrrrrrrmmmmm? What?
Are you telling us that someone in your family has three arms? Or perhaps 11 toes....that is not Normal.... ! Does someone in your family have a pierced foreheard? Purple hair? a ring through their nose.....because that's not normal....although it is starting to become more acceptabel.
I do not get the message you have posted here? Not sure what you mean by normal....are you meaning that your family is unique? Unique it may in fact be but, normal all the same.
Are you saying that your family faces certain judgements? YES--I can understand that some people are so full of {fill in blank}_________that they judge other families that do not look just like theirs. SAD:( One day maybe we can end that kind of attitude. Are you saying that other people turn their heads and look when they realize you are a 'family'? Well--yeah that happens when things are mixed up....people wonder about a lot of things....and you must admit sometime it is a little baffeling to others who do not understand how some families are put together....My children very much do not look like me--I get some strange looks now and then and even some odd questions--it happens....BUT WE ARE VERY NORMAL.
Maybe I'm missing the point, too, but I took the original poster's message to be saying simply that her family is healthy and flourishing but not "normal" in the sense that it is not "in the norm." In other words, don't try to worry about not "fitting in" with what other people think is "normal," since "normal" is not the same thing as "good." Does that sound any better?? Maybe not...but I don't think prose3a was trying to be offensive... I actually took her post as encouraging??
I'll reply directly to my own message to hit all bases. I think we assume the word "normal" means "healthy" or "good," when really when you consider the norm, it's far from that. Being unique means not fitting within those constraints. Being in a unique situation, despite some of the problems, allows you to better see your self (space intended). It's something worth looking at in detail (in my opinion). I think feeling a little more confused about your identity (to some degree) helps; cognitive dissonance means we're learning. I know it helped me.
Maybe this thread should have started with the word "average" replacing the word "normal".
I'm Polish-catholic. My wife is an Ashkenazi jew. Our son is bi-racial white and African American. Are we a normal family? yes. Are we an averge family, no (but who care).
-Ken
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