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Has anyone else had to deal with a situation like mine???
Our daughter's birth mom was raped at 13 by an unknown adult bi-racial male. It wasn't an attack or stranger situation, but he wasn't someone she knew. I guess the closest thing you could call it would be a date rape, though they were not actually dating.
Anyway, she was threatened and didn't tell anyone about the rape for several months. She also learned she was pregnant. She was urged and nearly forced to abort (twice) but in the end decided to protect her baby and place her for adoption. She chose us. the story of how she became pregnant has remained the same from day one. Friends and family have repeated the same story. She swore to it in an affidafit and testified to it at her termination of maternal rights hearing.
My DH and I were to travel to our sending state to testify in the termination of paternal rights hearing...which we were told would be a 10 minute formality. We talked with the attorney and all seemed well. Then, the atty comes right before we are to testify and tells us the judge had just called him into a private meeting and said he didn't believe the rape story told by our daughter's b-mom! The judge dropped a bomb and said he wasn't going to be terminating paternal rights even though it has been well over the 6 month "abandonment" time period and even though no one has ever come forward to claim responsibility and even though, regardless of consent, the sex was still considered a statutory rape due to her age! He says he will likely terminate due to the age/statutory factor, but wants to take extraordinary measures to track this guy down, including contacting our daughter's b-mom again and trying to get "the truth" out of her.
I feel she has been though more than enough and my heart goes out to her! She may not be telling the truth, only she and God know what really happened. I hope for her sake and our daughter's sake, she wasn't raped. But this is agony to have to wait with all these unknowns so the court can try to track down some guy who either is #1 a rapist, #2 a child rapist, #3 a child himself and relieved to not have to take responsibility,#4 is an older guy who doesn't want responsibility, or #5 is a guy who doesn't want to get into trouble for sleeping with a 13 year old girl and getting her pregnant! I could understand a child lying...she may be embarrassed or protecting some guy. This is just very hard and was a HUGE shock to us!!! Keep in mind, there is no evidence that she lied...just a hunch by the judge.
Has anyone else had to deal with this type of thing? Unknown b-birth fathers? Rape allegations? A VERY thorough judge who likes to drop last minute bomb shells?...felt like I was on Law and Order! Any advice other than "don't panic!!!"
It is hard not to panic and think up all the "what if's"...like what if it is a young kid and he knew all about it, but his mother didn't and wants the baby??? AHHH!!! I am just resting in God and His plan for our family. I know He holds us all in the palm of His hand and He saved our daughter's life twice. I KNOW He is taking care of her and I believe she is where He wants her to be.
Thanks for you replies!!! And I would greatly appreciate your prayers.
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