#2 mistakes~

I know you are in Japan, so I didn't know if you were familiar with Dr. Phil's one-day potty training method? Dr. Phil is a psychologist and sydicated talk-show host. Dr. Phil's method involves both of you parents setting a large amount of time, like a Saturday, to potty training and using a doll model going on the potty chair (or toilet) and singing and danciing and celebrating, similar to what the earlier poster was saying, but even having party horns and hats, etc. whenever the doll goes to the potty, and doing "muscle memory exercises" of having him go through the motions of having him got potty, AND telling him that his favorite character will call him when he successfully potties in the toilet or on the training potty seat. When he does it finally, you REALLY celebrate and you set up the call with a friend so that you can dial the number and say, ok, The power ranger is on the phone, and then that adult will congratulate him and talk a minute or two. You should start the day by telling him that when he goes potty on the toilet that you will be able to call teh character. It sounds kind of silly, but lots of people say this really works... on the other hand, that is usually pee-pee training, not poo, and I am not sure if you will be able to find a doll poo to model. Also, you really have to be prepared to make the child feel that the "muscle rehearsal" thing does not impy that not going is "bad." This is completely a positive-reinforcement behavior modification exercise. Good luck in finding a good solution, D.

Oh Gosh Christine, LOL, I remembered seeing that bear at Fred Meyers about a year ago and regreted not buying it. Now I can't find it. I only heard the song a few times (as my son kept making the bear sing) and to this day have that tune stuck in my head at times!! It still cracks me up.:D :D :D

Tee, hee, hee, haa, haa, haa..........giggles........:D Have an hour to kill, and stopped in at a cyber cafe. At this hour (just past noon), it's filled with a lot of busisness guys dressed in their fancy suits, and being all serious (part of that is just the Japanese culture). Then, in I come (blond, blue), and I sorta stand out a bit. In an effort to blend in and be as non-disruptive as possible, I go about the busisness of getting on line, and checking my email and here to see what's new, as unobtrusively as possible. Completely absorbed in reading these great new posts, I start hearing (in my head) the melody to the jingle you posted #1 DBCKS Fan, and I realize I am giggling. Oops! :o Okay, I think I've got it down now, though. I'm definitely going to teach him that song! He loves to sing, and he is learning so many songs at school now. I usually don't understand the words to them, because I am not nearly as fluent as he is, but this is one I think he's gonna love. Oh wow, you just posted again #1 Fan, so now I'm going to see if I was hearing it the right way in my head. I'm really looking forward to hearing it, thanks so much! Yes, DDHUAB, I have heard of Dr. Phil. I saw him once, on Oprah (I miss her show!), before we left the States. He seemed kind of mean that day, but I don't remember the topic. Anyway, yes, the idea sounds really great. It does go along the lines of what Eli's Mommy was suggesting, and I've been thinking of ways to modify it to suit him. The whole idea of having (the blue) Power Ranger call him afterwards sounds GREAT! He would just flip right out! He watches it on TV here, in Japanese, so I need to ask one of my Japanese friends to play that role for him. Actually, I know just who to do that, too! The whole idea of it taking primarily one day sounds totally fabulous, too. Thanks a lot for sharing. Just wanted to share, this morning, Joey "poopied" in his Anpanman underwear. For the first time, I had him clean them up. He despises getting his hands dirty, so it sort of grossed him out. His new word this week is "vulgar," and he used it (appropriately) while he was cleaning them up. His "cleaning" left a bigger mess than what he started with, but he did feel like he was taking care of it. I didn't approach it as punishment, in fact, I told him that it's okay, but I'm too busy with breakfast dishes to clean them up, so he needed to do it. At first, he looked at me like I was speaking in a third language, but finally, he went ahead and "cleaned" them. He didn't enjoy it at all, so maybe once he realizes that it's going to be his job to do it, then that will help work to end the gross undies. I'm hoping. Again, thank you all so much for your help. It's so nice to have you here for me. Arigato-gosimasu (thank you very much in Japanese), Venessia~

Do itashimashte (you're welcome) -- and, Gambare!!! (loosely translated, I suppose, as Hang in there!!) Wish I were there -- I miss the great Japanese food -- not much of that where we live, and hubby and children are definitely feeling deprived!!! Cheryl

I cannot imagine a week without at least two onigidi! It's so funny to me, the things we get used to in life. When we first came to Japan, I was VERY reluctant to try any of the food. It all looks and smells so different. Besides, I'm a lacto-ovo vegetarian (no chicken or fish in addition to beef, pork, etc.), and I was terrified I would sink my teeth into something "fleshy." Eww! Finally, I became really close friends with several ladies here, and they convinced me to at least taste a few things. Am I glad they did. I still cannot eat at restraunts, because everything has at least fish in it, but I can cook just about everything myself now. And what I can't, they happily make for me in exchange for home-baked cookies. :) It's a great arrangement. You could make charashizuchi, though it would admittedly be much more work from scratch. Soba would be another thing you could do with the things you can find in the market there. Of course, you would need sea weed to make the onigidi. I'll tell you what, if you have a list of ingredients you would like to have, PM me, and I'll be happy to swing by Jusco's for you, and mail you your items. Nobody should have to endure their dinners without miso soup! Sorry about going so far off the topic here, but I'm hungry, and this food topic was very appealing to me! Joey's mommy, Venessia~

yummy...you're making me hungry!!!! It's morning here, I just put the kids on the school bus and haven't had my breakfast yet! We do have some basics - because until recently DH's parents were still in Japan (now they live with us), and when he travelled back to the US for business, he'd often stop to see them and pick up some stuff. Actually a significant portion of our allotted shipment here was made up of good tofu (in boxes, not fresh, unfortunately!), nori, instant ramen and yakisoba, and sembe crackers (a favorite snack for kids, and me too!). We do have miso paste - or we would all die!!! And hubby usually brings back at least a few pounds of yummy Japanese rice - the basmati rice here just isn't up to par for my Japanese husband! What we miss is more the fresh stuff or stuff that has to be refrigerated -- good pickled daikon and other stuff, ffresh daikon for cooking, fish cakes, udon and soba, and seafood (Nepal is a landlocked country - no seafood here - and what is shipped in from India sometimes is spoiled so we're afraid to eat it). Oh well -- it makes for a fantastic vacation in Thailand at Christmas -- we can get a lot of stuff there at the Japanese market, and of course their seafood is incredible! (I'm mostly a vegetarian too - though I do eat fish and shellfish) Thanks for the offer - you are VERY sweet! How are things going with your DS???? Hope you're weathering all the taifuns ok? Cheryl

Well, what a week! Joey's only had two #2 mistakes, and we are thrilled! Both of them were at home, so his sensae is estatic. :D We are trying not to make too big a deal out of this success, just in case. We really don't want him to feel a huge let-down if he goes back. Especially with it being only for the past four days (50% success rate). But, we are just praising his bowel movements in the toilet. Yesterday, he wore Power Ranger underwear..........the same pair ALL DAY! I'm a proud mommy! Looks like we are going to be visited by yet another typhoon this weekend. It's pretty much a scientific fact; If my husband and son have a three day weekend, there will be a typhoon. Oh well, provides for lots of fun family time. Just no beach time, which we all love. I could have used a hand this morning, Cheryl. Today is obinto day for my son. So, I was up at 5:00am to have it all ready (as well as him ready) to leave for school by 8:30am. It's not that I don't enjoy making his obinto, I really do, it's just such a lot of work. Especially since he eats it in 10 minutes, and it's all over. His anticipation this morning was great, he just kept asking me to please let him see it before school. I am often tepted to show it to him, just so I can see the look on his face. You know those tiny, little eggs they sell at Jusco? Well, I bought those, and after boiling four of them, I was able to successfully turn two into baby chicks hatching. The white was the "shell," and the yolk was the yellow chick. They turned out adoreable! I really would have liked to have seen his response to those. How great that you are able to get those necessary ingredients! Lucky you. So you are planning on going to Thailand for the holidays? Is that something you do every year? Do you have family there? We miss the snow (well, okay not we, just me), so we were thinking of going to Tokyo this year for Christmas, but since Joey doesn't get off from school, we don't think we will go. I don't want him too far behind. We might go during the New Year's break, instead. Now that I am done with the obinto, it's time to think about dinner. Gotta run!

Congratualations! I am glad that things seem to be getting much better... keeping our fingers crossed for you! D.

Glad to hear things are going better!!! He must feel proud of himself too, and that will serve to reinforce -- would it be even more special to him if sensai also said something supportive? Obinto -- yummy -- I confess I have NEVER IN MY LIFE even begun to try... They are so gorgeous though - almost too gorgeous to eat! Even the simple ones you buy on the train... I'm VERY impressed!! You qualify as super Mom for sure! Cheryl

It's good to celebrate the successes. It can take a long time and you have to use the" you'll do better next time" for the accidents. Keep in mind too when you get those warning stripes on his pants, smell gas, or other signs you might tell him that means he should sit for a minute and try. Even if he is not successful he will learn to associate the feeling with going. For my son there were sometimes a few warning signs like this before he finally went. Also for constipation I sometimes gave him a little bit of senokot (only a few drops) or metamucil cookies and it made things easier but this is only when I noticed he was never really going. I hope you make progress -having dealt with lots of dirty pants-I sympathize.

Wow, thank you all so much for joining me in cheering my Joey on as he struggles through this milestone. This morning he had a teensy-weensy (Joey's words) mistake, and HE brought up the fact that his underwear needed changed. So, I made a big production of looking through the (empty) dryer, his clothset, and drawers to find just the right pair of underwear. Meanwhile, he was sitting on the potty telling me where to look. (While I was in his clothset, he is hollaring, "No honey, it's not in there! Sweetheart, look in the drawer!" It's so cute to hear him use the same terms of endearment on me that I use on him.) Once I finally "found" the right drawer, I had to go through describing all of the underwear to him so he could choose which ones he wanted to wear. Upon returning to his bathroom with a fresh pair of undies, I discovered that my stalling tactics worked. He had a bowel movement, and he was just beaming as I praised his success. Atta boy Joey! I also wrote that he had a positive potty experience in his daily parent-teacher comment book. So, his sensai will know about it, and hopefully, praise him, too. Thanks, Cheryl, for confirming my idea. It will mean a lot to Joey if she is encouraging his success at home. He adores her. Ma, I will definitely keep your constipation advice in mind. I don't want him to have a long-term success, only to have it shattered by consitipation. It would break my heart to see him go through that. Well, this is a three-day weekend for both my husband as well as my son. So, we will all be home together. Of course, the beach will be out of the question because of (yet again) another typhoon. So we are planning on having our "Dr. Phil" training session on Sunday. When I mentioned your idea D., to my husband, he was all for it. At the time, he was washing out a messy pair of underwear, so he probably would have been all for using duct tape, too, but they say timing is everything. ;) I feel like the timing is good because he has been doing so well this week. I'll be back on Tuesday, and I'll share how it went. I hope you all have a wonderful weekend, and again, thanks so much to everyone for cheering Joey on. It really does mean a lot. Joey's "sweetheart", Venessia~

I am so happy that Joey is doing so well. I am also happy that you have not had to clean yucky underwear out. I know he is just so proud of himself. Tell him I am proud of him and he is such a big smart boy. Poopy in the potty is hard to do for little boys...but not for him because he is big! Good luck! I hope he keeps it up!

Thank you Eli's Mommy, for all your encouragement! I am elated to announce that he has successfully done his pooping in the potty for the past nine days in a row! HORRAY JOEY! :D He is so proud of himself, that he even told my neighbor this morning about it on our way to the car. Fortunately, our neighbor is a very nice lady who seems to have no qualms talking about such topics with a three year old boy. She even asked him if he flushed it and washed his hands. Sweet lady, eh? There were times when I really believed that there must be something wrong with my son's body, or with me as a mom. It was a very discouraging, long potty training experience. There were moments when my frustration would seem to be bigger than Joey's own disappointment. But, in the end, when he was ready, Joey stopped going in his underwear. He is now potty trained, and though there will probably be a few mistakes to come, I know he can do it. Both physically and emotionally, he can do this. It's just his decision, not mine, to go in the potty. I hope that somebody else can benifit from our experience, and maybe not have as much stress as we did. I am an educated woman who desperately loves this little boy, so at times I felt like my frustration was irrational. In fact, that is what led me to post here in the first place. But, when we want so badly for our children to succeed in something, especially something we know they can do, our passion often gets control of our logic. So, I guess, all I can say is to be as patient as possible. Encourage the successes, but try not to make such a big deal out of the mistakes you will surely face along the way. When he (or she) is ready, it will all fall into place. Thanks to everybody, each and every one of you, who made a comment, suggestion, or offered support. It seems silly to others who have not faced this, but potty success is, in fact, a big milestone that we parents can get quite caught up in. At least this mommy did!

YAAAAAAAAH JOEY! That is so great. Nine days in a row! I am smiling from ear to ear. I know it must be a great feeling for everyone in your family. I look farward to that sharing that feeling with my son. May the days of poop free underwear continue!!!

I am so glad that Joey is feeling proud of his success! I haven't been checking the boards for the past week, and I was wondering how Joey was doing. Now you can move on to the next milestone! D.