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I left my ex husband in 1997 after 8 years of abuse. He tormented me and my children until one day I loaded them on a bus and fled to Colorado. I had to rebuild our lives and it was hard. We really did not hear much from him or his family, except to try and talk me into returning to him. I gave in and allowed the kids to visit one summer under my grandmother's watchful eyes, he did not take care of them. In 1999 I was re married to a great guy who has been taking care of us since. When my ex found out that I was remarried he began paying 69 per month to retain parental rights, but he has done nothing else. He has sent them 3 boxes in the last 7 years to the children, he does not call on birthdays, Christmas or any other times. He claims that we have moved and he could not contact us but it is just another lie. Now that I have entered into the Film industry I am getting calls and emails from him and his famly accusing me of not letting him contact the children. He sent an email to our son telling them to basically run away to him because we wont let them see him. The children laughed, because they know that he has not done anything for them, he just wants them now because he thinks he can get money out of it. He has been arrested twice for beating me as well as had counselors advise me to leave for my own protection. He has had a violent pass including attacking his mother and sister, and trying to rape his own aunt. However his family is well known in their community and tries to keep their dirty little secrets. The children are 16,12, and 10. He is now using them as pawns. What can we do to have my husband adopt the children and get this guy out of their lives?
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Is he still paying the $69 a month and is there a court order in family law courts. Also do you still share joint custody or do you have full custody?
I have custody and yes he has been made to 69 per month, even though he works for the post office and has done so for over 6 years.
So a family court granted you sole legal and physical custody of the children? Also you said he pays the money yet has not seen them in the past year right? Also is there a court order that orders him visitation? If so what are the arrangements.
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There has never been arrangements. In the divorce he did not show so I was given custody. The support was set for more however because I was on DSS in Colorado I started getting checks from him from colorado child support registry.
You could file under the California 8604 code. If he hasn't had contact since 1999 it's abandonment. And since he has a violent history, the court is going to look at that harder than his paying $69.00 per month. That is a pittance for 3 children.
Your children are also old enough to make their desires known and this will help. If the kids want to be adopted he is going to have a hard time claiming that servering his parental right is not in their best interest.
Hope this helps.