Open Adoption awareness

Yes, that is a great letter. Perhaps DO work on an open adoption article and submit it to them as freelance material. Don't just send it once either. Send it once a month (persistence does pay off). Maia

Ess922,I love your letter! I hope they print it! Great Job!Nic

What a great letter. Seriously. Keep sending it. Brenda has a point about persistence. :D And NicNic, you have now planted a seed in my head regarding a birthmother and adoptive mother writing a letter/article together. Does anyone actually have a copy of this article on hand (or is it on the net?)... because I've got wheels in motion, folks. ;)

You all got my couriousity going about American Baby so I took a look at their website. I found a few "articles" about adoption, one being a general overview of open adoption, American Baby listed the source for the information in this article as the National Adoption Clearinghouse. Thought you all might be interested to read it, I was taken aback by some things. Unfortunately many of the things I'd call out as incorrect are common to most parenting magazines when it comes to open adoption. American Baby Open Adoption article... "Open adoption means that birth parents and adoptive parents have some knowledge about one another. The birth parents know something about the adoptive parents and may even help choose them. Adoptive parents and their children know medical and genetic information about the birth family and other information that might help in dealing with the emotional issues that often accompany adoption. There is no universally accepted definition of open adoption. While informal open adoptions have occurred for centuries, whereby grandparents, aunts and uncles, or godparents raised children not born to them but whose parents were known to them, the concept of formal open adoption is quite new -- less than 20 years old. Open adoption can take many forms. In some cases, a birth mother may leaf through a book containing photographs and descriptions of prospective adopters and choose a couple or person she feels would give her baby a good home. She may never meet the adopters, and this may be her only contact with them. At the other extreme, a birth mother may meet the adoptive parents, visit their home, and have ongoing contact throughout the child's life. Adoption social workers also disagree about the degree of openness that is desirable in adoption. Some agencies encourage the birth mother to play a prominent role in the child's life. Others limit the amount of personal information (i.e., telephone numbers and addresses) exchanged between the prospective adoptive parents and the birth mother. There are also agencies that allow the birth mother and the adoptive parents to decide how much and what kind of future contact they will have with each other."

Ha, Sugar Baby's,I got curious yesterday too, to see if I could find the most recent inflammatory article, so I 'researched' at work. My blood pressure spiked so I had to close the window and walk away. While they have a whole section dedicated to adoption, they sure don't have any updated information. As in, any information about the difference between semi-open and open adoptions. Any information for expectant Mother's considering adoption at ALL! (I remember that hurt me (mentally) when I was considering placement and received the magazine. Sigh.)I guess we still have a lot of work to do, don't we?

"She gave up her baby" VS: "She gave her baby a family." Yes, I believe the latter is an improvement, but it also reminds me of a drawing I saw on the CUB website of a birthmother and her newborn. It is captioned, "Who cares about keeping THIS family together?" While I was in the process of relinquishment, I felt/heard/saw that no one cared about keeping my (me and birthdaughter) family together. I was raised to believe that accepting government aid is shameful. And "Christians" (and agency) told me that relinquishing means I love the baby, and single parenting is shameful and robs/harms the child. I did not have a support system (if I chose to parent), among the only community (I had ever known) of "Christians." For me, adoption was a decision born of fear, inexperience, and intimidation. And I believe many of those "Christians" had premarital sex too. edited to add: I do not believe that accepting aid is shameful.

That is from The National Adoption Information Clearinghouse's old fact sheet on open adoption. They have updated the fact sheets this past year on a number of topics including "Openness in Adoption" and "The Impact of Adoption on Birthparents", both of which I worked on. They are both much better now.

Brenda, I'm glad to hear it, and wish that American Baby would update their info since so many see their publication.

Brenda,I was surprised when it was noted that the information was from the NAIC because I frequent their website when I'm hunting down specific information. I do think American Baby needs to be notified of this fact, that they are pretty much putting out false and outdated information.

I realize this thread has been dead for a month or so, but I just found it today. Jenna, I don't know if you ever found the article or not, so I thought I'd post a link. FYI... it really is a HORRIBLE story.

Maybe not horrible. Considering the amom wanted a closed adoption, at least she's trying. But I was still offended.

I am SO glad this woman is NOT my daughters Aparent...

Ugg indeed. Wanting to send back his birthday gift unopened? Begrudgingly sending out a twice a year package? I hope she has no plans to adopt again! Especially if she thinks that is an open adoption. I knew I shouldn't have read it. Peggy

Did anyone see the episode of Dr. Phil last month about adoption? What did you think? I just saw the last 20 minutes of it and was shocked by the stalking birthmother and the nasty aparents who adopted a little boy from India (I think). The aparents of the little boy said that they didn't love him and told this toddler that they wished they could send him back. How awful! I was happy to see Dr. Phil do what he does best and laid into the aparents about loving that little boy and it helped them, but had I been a pbirthparent that would've put the brakes on quickly for me.

I did see that episode and was furious at that family.. I liked what Dr. Phil told them.. but int he back of my mind what I really wanted him to do was let them know that if they could not find thier way to loving him , that they should place him for adoption with a family that WILL give him the love he needs.. I am sad to think about him growing up with a familuy that feels that way about him.