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Ok I'll try to make this as short as possible..My ex husband has had NO contact with my son in 4 1/2 years..I remarried 4 years ago to a great man and he has taken on this child as his own..My son even goes by my husband last name..Really it is the only dad he has ever known in his life..My husband is wanting to adopt my son but really we dont know what to do..We have talked about it and my son has asked us to please let dad adopt me..But,I have been really nice all these years and allowed my ex mother and law and family see him..I've let them come get him whenever they wanted and there was this understanding about the "biological donor". Well, my son is bipolar and is under care of a therapist and I have been told not to address this issue yet that mentally he may not be able to handle the "biological" thing yet..My son had been at his grandmothers most the summer and didnt think anything..Well, she called me to let me know he saw his "biological donor" b/c she felt he needed to then she took him out of the state to spend the night with him..Now all this time I have NO CLUE this has happened..I wanted him to come home so I ended up going to get him b/c she wouldnt bring him back..I have advised them NOT to call anymore b/c they are always wanting to start in and I have NO legal obligation to them..Well, they wont stop calling..They think it is ok for the "bio" to walk right back into his life like nothing ever happened when he abondand him when he was four..I'm lost and dont know what to do this is really bugging me..I've tryed being nice and it's not working..PLEASE HELP!!!
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First of all, contact an attorney and get the ball rolling to get this child adopted! Then, change your phone number and mark all mail "return to sender", and if they show up, call the police. It may tick them off, but at this stage of the game, it's best for your child. This lady had NO business taking YOUR child out of state.
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Ok..Now My ex has filed a contempt charge against me for his visitaion rights..I thought this was funny b/c I have hear/saw him in over 4 years..But now he is getting remarried in a few months and now i guess he wants to play daddy...lol
One of my Attorneys has told me to get the visitaion case out of the way and then we will do the adoption part of this and hopefully get this over with..
PLEASE GIVE ME SOME ADVISE!!!
I don't know if I have any answers, seems like if he has not exercised his right to see the child in four years then he is SOL. My brother was able to adopt his step sons because the sperm donor never paid chld support. So it was either pay five years of back child support or sign over parental rights. You did not not say if the "donor" just hadn't seen him but still paid support or if he did nothing at all. I would get any documentation from his therapist as to his opinion and if visits are a must I would ask they be supervised. Your child's grandparent had no right to take the child out of state without your permission and I would contact an attorney to see if there is any legal ramifications for that. Good luck and keep us posted.Carolyn