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Do we need to be members of a synagogue (we attend High Holiday services there) to ask the Rabbi for assistance or advice in this process? Is that wrong or improper? We want to join the synagogue but we are in the process on looking to buy a house and obviously preparing to adopt, so finances are tight... didn't know if anyone had any experience with this.
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My beautiful baby girl was adopted at birth (US domestic infant adoption). Her birth parents are not Jewish. When she was around 6 months old, our rabbi held a beautiful conversion ceremony for her and a group of other adopted babies. I am not sure if all of the parents were members or not. We are actually not members of the temple. Our son went to preschool at the temple. Our daughter now goes for infant care. So that is how we knew about him. It didn't matter if your baby was caucasion (ours is) or born out of the country, etc. All that matterd was the adoptive parents (really the parents) wanted their baby converted to Judaism. Interestingly enough, conversions are only done for baby girls. A mikva is performed. Since we live in S. Florida, we met at the beach. The babies were dunked in the water by one parent. A bunch of prayers were said..then they were officially welcomed into the Jewish life. FYI..boys do not get converted. They normally get a bris. They are considered Jewish at that time. A few weeks after the "dunking" ceremony, we received a lovely certificate from the temple. It was inscribed with our daughter's hebrew name. It officially welcomed her into the land of Judaism. She is now considered a Jew in every aspect. Now here are some humorous things about our daughter. She is this gorgeous blonde hair/blue eyed princess. We all have brown hair & brown eyes. She LOVES matzo balls, gefilte fish, blintzes, bagels with creme cheese & lox... um hummontosh cookies, knish's... LOL! and many many more. She LOVES to eat! She is of course this tiny little girl (her bmom is only 5 ft) with an adorable round tummy. Anyway- good luck & best wishes with your future plans! Julie
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Rena - As we are not members of the synagogue, do you think the best thing would be to call and try and set up an appoointment? The Rabbi is fairly young - probably mid to late thirties or so himself and seems wonderful which is why I thought perhaps he might be of some help. I have left vm messages for JFS in our area several times and have not gotten return calls. Thanks for your help... Rebecca
A correction.
Girls require only immersion (tavilah) in a mikvah.
Boys require BOTH circumcision (milah) and immersion (tavilah). Tavilah is done after the circumcision site heals.
Both boys and girls may be named in a synagogue ceremony, though most boys don't have namings because the Hebrew name is given during the brit milah or hatafat dam brit ceremony.
You don't need to be a member of a synagogue to call the rabbi and ask for a referral to a mohel -- the person who does the brit milah. Brit milah is not done in a synagogue. If a baby is newborn, the brit milah is usually done at home on the eighth day of his/her life. If a baby is older, brit milah needs to be done in a hospital.
You can use a mohel who is also a physician, so that both the circumcision and the ceremony are done in the operating room. You can then have a celebration at a later date. Or you can have a non-ritual circumcision in the operating room, and then have a mohel do a ceremony called hatafat dam brit at home, when you can also celebrate with a party.
You also don't have to be a member of a synagogue to call a rabbi and ask if he/she will arrange a conversion at a mikvah. The conversion will require the presence of three rabbis or other observant Jews. It will also require a mikvah -- either a natural body of "living water" or a manmade ritual bath under Orthodox or Conservative supervision.
As to a naming, most synagogue naming ceremonies are done for members of the congregation. If you are not a member of a congregation, and want to do a naming, you can do a beautiful home ceremony. You can invite a rabbi to officiate, or you can do one without a rabbi. And you can invite all your relatives and friends.
There is a good book on the market -- I can't promote commercial products on this site -- that helps you create meaningful ceremonies for brit milahs and namings. It also helps you choose a name for your baby, explain brit milah and such to non-Jewish family members, design Jewish birth or adoption announcements, etc.
Sharon
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