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Well, so much for all of the support I was giving out just the other day. Things were going so well. I told my dad and he was super suportive and my fiance was coming around. Then, I told my mom last night. She is really upset and wants me to not have this baby. I don't feel like I can face her right now and I don't know what to do. She keeps calling me and reminding me that I'm on a timeline and is telling me to cancel plans to study for a huge test I have coming up because she wants to talk to me. She is really angry right now. I feel like it's really unfair becaue I am an adult and need to make this decision on my own. I told her becaue I felt that she would be supportive and could maybe give me some advice. All she wants to know is "how could I even consider bringing a baby into the world right now!" Thanks for listening.
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[font=Verdana][font=Verdana]Dear jessy_lee,[/font] [font=Verdana]Your Mom is in shock. Let her vent. I was in her shoes a year ago with my daughters unplanned pregnancy. I was totally numb for two days. I cringe to think about what my daughter might have written about me. I soon got over it and started to get excited about the baby.[/font] [font=Verdana]It was hard. I had to let go of my plan for my daughterҒs life and learn to let her live her own life and to make her own plan. With her son, she has blossomed and matured into a daughter to be proud of. It will take her longer to graduate from college (she starts back tomorrow!) but she will graduate. Reassure your Mom that are determined to finish school. She is worried about your future.[/font] [font=Verdana]Your Mom will come around and let go of her timeline. It is really hard for parents to see their kids get derailed. Sometimes we just start patting ourselves on the back on our success at raising our children when life smacks us in the face.[/font] [font=Verdana]Happy GMa[/font] [/font]
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Hang tough - mamat06 & happygmom are right, I think that your mom needs some time to cool over and settle down.
Hmmm, how can you consider bringing a baby into this world? Think maybe I might be tempted to say "How can I not?" There is never a guarantee that when wants to get pregnant and be a parent that they can or will be able to, so, I think that is a consideration that should weigh heavily on a woman when she discovers that she IS pregnant.
Timing may not be perfect, but, I know way too many women who relinquished babies, and then never had another child. Secondary infertility in women who relinquish is high - it is actually even high in the general population. We just never know when we may get a chance again.
So, I think, if we ever want to mother a child, we take the opportunity when it comes to us and relish it and embrace the chance we are given. Motherhood is a wondrous miracle - and I sometimes think we do not value it enough - think it will wait - till we are ready. Babies aren't dispensable, the baby we give away/adopt out could be the only one we ever have. Even if we have other children, each is unique and irreplaceable and we feel the loss no matter how many more we might have.
Would your mother want you NOT to have this baby knowing it could be the only chance you may give her to be a grandmother? I don't think so. Just something to think about.
I bet she will come around.