Rebecca & Ryan

I grew up in eastern Iowa, which is where most of my family still lives. My parents were both teachers. My mom taught high school Spanish for many years, and my dad taught auto-mechanics at a community college. My parents were very loving and supportive of me, even though I was very different from them in some ways, and I see them as models for how I want to parent. My father died suddenly when I was 23, and still I miss him a lot. My mom is retired and lives in Iowa with her fiancé Mike. We are very close with them. I also have a sister named Lauren, who lives in Des Moines with her husband Chad and two amazing kids Carter and Avery. Carter is 10, is very outgoing, and loves Pokemon, soccer, and tennis. Avery just turned 8, and she is very funny and sassy, and loves all things Barbie. My family are all very excited about our decision to adopt, especially Carter and Avery, who can’t wait to meet their little cousin!

I am very close with my sister and my parents. My sister lives in Washington, DC with her husband and two-year-old son, and they are expecting a baby girl. I adore my nephew, and I'm so excited for my niece to be born. Ryan and I see my sister and her family at least 6 or 7 times a year, and I text or talk to my sister almost every day. Some of my favorite childhood memories are of playing with my own cousins, and I’m so pleased that our future child will have cousins around his or her age. I am also very close with my mom and dad, who have always been a source of love, support, and advice in my life. They are patient and loving grandparents, and they take care of my nephew while my sister and her husband are at work. When Ryan and I told my parents we wanted to adopt a child, they were absolutely thrilled.

We are both pretty active and energetic people, and we like to try new things. We like hanging out with our friends and inviting people over to our house for game nights and barbeques–we’ve perfected our recipe for making pizza on the grill. We also like exploring upstate New York: during the summers we like to go camping and hiking in the nearby Adirondacks, and during the colder parts of the year we like going to different towns and checking out new thrift stores, bookstores, breweries, and restaurants. We also like to travel, especially to see friends and family. Christmas and Thanksgiving are important times when we see our families, celebrate, and give thanks. Every summer we spend a week at a lake with Becca’s family, swimming, playing games, and enjoying our time together. We also have friends in lots of different places, and sometimes we get a chance to visit them and their families in Texas and in Florida. Our favorite place we ever visited together was Yellowstone National Park, because we saw so much cool wildlife! Most of all we just like spending time together. We can’t wait to share our hobbies and adventures with a child, and to encourage them in their own interests!

The first thing I love about Ryan is how thoughtful and intelligent he is. When I met Ryan, he was in graduate school, studying to become a history professor. He chose a job that would push him to think deeply about our country’s past, and how that past affects our future–and to teach young people to see and think about the world in new ways. I was impressed by what a dedicated researcher and writer he was. When I talk to Ryan about things that are important–like work, or current events, or our lives together–he considers problems deeply. And he’s open to changing his mind. I also love Ryan’s sense of fun and adventure. He actively seeks out new experiences, whether it’s finding a new used bookstore or visiting a new country. He loves to travel more than anyone I’ve ever met. Before I met Ryan, I had never gone camping or on a road trip. Now I love to do both of those things! Ryan is a loyal and deeply dedicated person. When I got cancer, Ryan was living across the country due to his job, but he flew across the country and visited me almost every weekend. I know it was an exhausting commute for him, but he wanted us to be together. Ryan’s loyalty shows in his friendships, too. He has lifelong friends from childhood and college, and even though they live far away, they are still close. Based on Ryan’s devotion to me, his family, and his friends, I know that he will be a wonderful father.

There are so many things I love about Becca, but I’ll just name a few. First, she is funny. I laugh more with Becca than with anyone I’ve ever met. I especially love the silly songs and voices she makes up for our pets, which get me rolling with laughter. Second, she is smart, so smart! She’s level-headed and organized (which is why she’s such a great lawyer), but also genuinely curious about the world. I love talking with her about all kinds of topics and ideas. Third, she is kind. She especially shows empathy for animals. She’s changed the way I see the world: for example, just the other day I found myself trapping a big gross spider in our house and releasing it into our yard unharmed. That’s pure Becca! The way she cares about all creatures big and small inspires me to be more caring and thoughtful. Becca is also wonderful with children (and I’m not just saying that for this booklet!). She is everyone’s favorite aunt, and whenever we pull up to my sister’s house our niece and nephew come sprinting to her side of the car in excitement. She genuinely loves spending time with babies and children, sitting on the floor and playing with them for hours, and talking to them about their lives. I know she will be a spectacular mother, one who dedicates herself to her child while also allowing them to become who they are, and one who mothers with humor, thoughtfulness, and grace.

We live in a small village in central New York state, with a population of just a few thousand people. The village has a tight-knit community and we know many of our neighbors. Three blocks with restaurants, coffee shops, stores, and a movie theater make up the downtown. Our house is a short walk from the downtown area, and we walk to our favorite coffee shop every week. We also enjoy going to public events on the town green, like concerts, tag sales, and the weekly farmer's market. The village is a great place for kids to grow up in. The excellent local school, which includes all grades from kindergarten through high school, is located just a five-minute walk from our house. Because the village is small and houses are located close to businesses, kids can start walking downtown to get ice cream or meet up with friends at a pretty young age. There are many community events for kids, like the Fourth of July parade, the Christmas tree lighting festival, and family movie showings at the theater. We are excited to share events like these with our future child!