Babysitting Questions

Thanks for this advice. The story has proven to scare the crap out of me, but I was all ready on edge about this so it's not really your fault. ;) I'm tempted to install a lock on our bedroom door but then I think, in my "totally" rational mind, "What if there's a fire and she needs to get in to put it out?!" (Fire hazards; locked doors, painted shut windows, etc are always in the forefront of my mind with a firefighter for a Husband!) Anyway, I digress. References, yes. Definitely. But I didn't think to "check out the family." I will add that kind of questioning into an interview. I obviously can't demand that x-babysitter's Husband get a background check, too, but I can ask questions. I just hope something can work out. I told my employer that I'm going to need at least three months to figure all of this out (that's the advice my Mom gave me) and now I'm realizing that she wasn't exaggerating. :(

Actually, your firefighter husband would recommend that she just get out of the house and leave the putting out to the professionals, right? It never hurts to do a credit check and drive by their house when you're trying to check someone out. If they owe everyone in the world money and are defaulting right and left, it can tell you a lot.

Awesome idea. That's why I'm nervous to go with a college student (though when I posted that on a different parenting forum, whew, I got lit up by some college student Moms who WERE responsible. heh. Obviously I realize not ALL college students are irresponsible!) ./.. anyway, even with that, I worry that the student will still break the contract not really understanding that I could take them to court and sue them over the issue. I sure didn't realize that broken contracts were a sue-able offense back in my college days. So much to consider. :(

LOL, yes. ;) And I didn't think about a credit check. It DOES tell you a lot. *writes down more information on ever growing file about child care* I need all of this advice and information. But the more I get... the more I want to cry.

Jenna, How far away are you from the nearest "big city" now? I know that many placement agencies work with people in a pretty wide radius - you might check with licensed nannying agencies in the nearest big town (even if it is an hour + away) and see if they have people who live close to your area. A good agency will understand your concerns about a decent nanny, and will do the background checks AND drug testing as well as being insured and bonded. Other than that, I think your idea to check at the local college for an elementary ed student is good! That is how our church hires workers for the nursery (in which I have a vested interest since Emma is in there each week). The plus is that not only is she screened and trained and interested in kids, but she also is CPR/First Aid trained to boot. Good luck - you are in an unenviable position. :grouphug:

MrsSmith, I didn't know that the placement agencies could have such a wide range. I was just doing some research here and our city doesn't have one but I'm sure Columbus would!!!! That's good to know. I'll do some research on THAT now. Keep the advice coming, folks. It's helping to calm my nerves...a little. Little.

don't forget to have them take a red cross class and be certified in infant and toddler cpr. make them update it each year (we paid so she didn't have to). we hired a nanny that other folks at the college were using. I suggest you contact a college day care center nearby, for students or for folks working there who might know of other nannies/day care workers. our nanny was an artist and nanny who enjoyed the part time aspect of it all. don't be afraid to put a lock on your bedroom door or whatever to keep folks out. we also made specific plans for what she could and couldn't do (no running around doing errands with dd, for example). we also didn't require her to do work around the house-her primary focus was dd (and then the cats, lol). we paid a living wage, which was important to me, and we didn't pay off the books. she was taking care of the most precious thing to me, my daughter, and i wanted to pay her for that-I had very high expectations. I'll try and find a website that helped me and post it later.

here's a website that had a lot of good info including a nanny agreement for folks to use. gave me some things to think about. [url]http://www.nanny.org/families.htm[/url]

Lisa, thanks for the website and the advice. I love how you found an artist/nanny who liked the part time aspect. Can I put that in an ad? Family seeks a part-time artist, part-time Nanny to watch child 1-2 days per week and simultaneously draw him on a daily basis. JK. ;) Ooh, this website is nice. Anyway, yes, we're not looking for housekeeping or cleaning or any of that. I just want someone to care for the kid (we dont' even have pets!). Obviously, as they would be in our home during dinner, they could feel free to eat whatever they want (though our food selection is often times quite boring!!!!). And yes, I'm willing to pay a little more to assure that Nicholas is well cared for. Keep it all coming!

Guh, Columbus doesn't even have a placement agency listed on the INA link. :( Apparently I can have quality child care if I live north or south in the state - not in the middle. :(

Hey Jenna, I don't know how far you are from Columbus, but I would call down to OSU and see if you can find a college student through the College of Human Ecology who would be willing to nanny for you. (That's the college that does the early childhood development major.) I have a friend at church who uses a nanny who is also a college student. I can ask her tomorrow where she found N and get back to you as well. Jenny (a fellow central Ohioian. :) )

Jenna, Is it possible that Josh works with someone who has small child(ren) and a spouse who might be willing to keep babe for the one day a week? I agree that finding a college student or especially a senior is a great idea. Do you have a YMCA or something close by that has swim classes for older women; you could place a personal flyer there? Sixty year old, retired mothers and grandmothers would be a perfect choice, and they would agree that the reading for your babe is a priority. In fact, I agree, aside from laughing, holding and snuggling, I would say reading should be an integral part of everyday for all babes. Started with mine at birth. Hope you find a solution that you feel good about.

When we brought our children home from Russia, I wanted to hire a nanny 2 days a week that would help my son keep his native language. We found a woman through a referral who "sat" on different days of the week for different people. I called all her current clients, including the ones who referred her to us, and got wonderful recommendations. She worked for us 2 days a week, 7 hours a day for 8 months. It was wonderful. Our children loved her and she was very attached to them. I found that they really weren't getting anything extra out of their time with her. She usually had my oldest watching videos and spent her time taking care of the baby. We ended up putting our children in daycare after 8 months because our hours changed and she couldnt be more flexible, and because I wanted them to be exposed to a more scholastic enviornment. But at that point I was looking for a 9-5 solution so it was easier for me. My niece also worked as a nanny for some time while in college. She worked for a professor and his wife a few days a week, a few hours a day. It was a great set up for them all and she worked with them for 4 years. She mentioned that this was pretty common at her school. Maybe calling the college and asking if any of the staff can recommend someone to you since you are new to the area would help. She did take the Red Cross infant CPR/ first aid class through her school. She was not bonded and not with an agency, so if that is part of your criteria, the college route probably wouldnt work. Another girlfriend found her nanny of 8 years through her church. She mentioned it to a few people there and found someone in the congregration that was doing this actively and available. Good luck! Christina

If you end up looking into him going into someone else's home, try your local school. The school's in our area keep a list of mom's who do home daycare. We found when calling it that some of the listings were out of date, but that it came up with good options. Isn't finding someone to care for your child terrifying? We were looking in December, and luckily my best friend's mom (who I've known since I was 14) agreed to take Shawntay after school three days a week until my husband returns home in April. No long term commitment, though, so I'm on the lookout again next month, sigh. Good luck! Allana

IM sure you have thought of this, but what about one of the other firefighters wives or girlfriends? My sister babysits in her home for a co worker of her husbands. Its working out great for them. Just a thought. Good luck hon, first times always so hard.