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Just wanted to update my situation in case it helps someone else out with this issue. I ended up choosing a different agency, one i felt more comfortable with. I didnt ask about adopting from out of state at the first class, because i had such a negative response to it from the first agency, and because i was the only adopting parent in the class, the rest were there for foster care.
But when i talked to my adoption worker, she said *yes* her agency will place kids from out of state, and its because they have something called an interstate compact. She said not all agencies in the area want to deal with that, so they just refuse to to out of state placements, but that her agency doesnt have a problem with it. She said the main problem is that if it doesnt work out, the child has to move back to that state, which is pretty traumatic.
There is also the issue of the fact that i homeschool my son, and want to be able to homeschool any child placed with me (before finalization), she said that in my state (MI) it would be fine, but if the child is from another state we'd have to go by the rules of the other state. So right now i'm going to stick to MI, unless i can't find a child (which i can't imagine given my parameters, male child under 12 any race.)
Katherine