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Originally Posted By Kate
If the birthmother or family's visits in an open adoption become excessively frequent and disruptive, can the legal parents of the child move away???
Originally Posted By yes
Please do not forget that you are the parents now, if you want to move......move! I hope you can get away from this troublemaker!
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Originally Posted By donna
you can move away but if you agreed on visits and then theres really not much you can do. plus if its legal on paper then moving cant stop visits
Originally Posted By Lizzy
Contact the agency. As she said, if it's in paper, than there may be a problem. If not, then let the agency know that you do not want conatct at this time until the mother seeks help. She sounds like she has some mental problems!
Originally Posted By danyale franklin
right now i am unemployed which contributes greatly to this decision.moving may be possible
Originally Posted By PLEASE MOVE!
This birthmom sounds very unstable and she may do harm to you or your faily, especially your baby!
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Originally Posted By Andy
Sure you can, but it should not come that far, you need to be open about it, let them know if you feel that it is too much. Our bmom has to come during the week now, cause we only see dady on the weekend, so we can not have bmom here on those day's, she understands, she lives only 20-30 min away, and she wanted a lot of contact. It's been ~2.5 month we have not seen or heared from her - most of the time they get on with their lives, work, other children they may have but it is compforting for her to know that she can come - and she knows that they are doing just fine.
Originally Posted By (Shannon) Tyler'sBmom8-31-2000
I am a little unsettled about some of the responses I see here to the original question! First of all there is no mention as to how much the bfamily is actually visiting. Secondly it wasn't mentioned if she has ever been told that you think it's too much or if you've kept it to yourself. Third, there is no mention of mental instability in the original post. Please everyone before you are so quick to judge and "assume" the bmom is unstable or "may do harm to your family" please get some of the basic facts. We birthmoms cannot read minds and we NEED aparents to tell us when we are doing something that makes them uncomfortable. IF a bparent truly is a danger then by all means stop the contact but if it's a simple misunderstanding or your own personal fears/worries that need to be worked out that's not something we should be at blame for. I'm sorry if this offends anyone. But all members of the triad need to remember to approach this with all the info and a clear head. Many hugs to you. I have no idea of all the circumstances so I am not going to give you advice about whether to move or not.
Shannon