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HI!
I have just accepted the honor of Forum Host for this particular forum!
I am an adoptive mom to 4! Two adoptions, first was singular, next was a triple! One boy and his twin sisters.
I would like to see if there are folks out there who have siblings that they adopted, or anyone who is thinking about it? Or perhaps you are an adoptee who was adopted with your siblings.
Please pop in and let me get to know ya!
jenbear78
Also we are Christians, and I homeschool so I am wondering what oposition we might come across due to these things? My son is in first grade this year and I homeschooled him for kindergarten he went to a private school this year and was the top in his class for reading and does great in all things, so I feel that I have the ability to be a good teacher. I know foster kids would have to go to public school and I have been in our public schools and just feel it would be better if they weren't in that environment, so would it be better if I try and only foster kids that are under the school age? The adoption way IF we were chosen we could make our own decisions for the kids, but again, we might not be chosen right away. Thanks for any and all your answers or advice.
Usually, you cannot homeschool until the adoption is final. That is about 6 months after placement. We also homeschool. I have all four of mine at home and would prefer to homeschool any adoptive placement but I doubt I would be allowed to.
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We were matched through our county. It was a bit unusal because they were rushing. They had two siblings who had been placed in separate foster homes who were crying every day to be reunited. The four and a half year old couldn't speak and the 6 yr old was almost impossible to understand. They told us we'd have 15 minutes to hear about their case and then we'd meet them. Then we'd have to decide instantly if we'd take them home that day and it would be a commitment to adopt. We said okay and the rest is history.
We are Christians and homeschool all of our kids now. But until we officially adopted them, those two had to go to public school. They even made us put the 4 yr old in pre-K because he "needed the speech therapy" even though the school could only provide him with 60 minutes of speech therapy per month. Which meant less than 4 minutes per day for him, for a child who couldn't speak at all.
However, we always do what we call "after schooling" with our foster kids. We've taught some to read and others we've caught up on their basic math skills. The teachers just keep going whether the kids know the material or not, so there are a lot of holes in their education.
Oh, and we have four kid rooms with two beds in each, some are bunkbeds and some are separate. One room also had a toddler bed beside the bunk beds, where my almost 1 yr old sleeps.
Jess
Love the details thanks, you mean you were matched by your county because you were going adoption only through fostercare is that right? Thanks so much, Jen
Love the details thanks, you mean you were matched by your county because you were going adoption only through fostercare is that right? Thanks so much, Jen
Love the details thanks, you mean you were matched by your county because you were going adoption only through fostercare is that right? Thanks so much, Jen
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We are hopefully adopting a sibling group out of foster care in Texas this year. Of course we are waiting for the right match.
Here's to more action on the Sibling Group Forum!
Sorry, scrapsathome, I went back and reviewed the listings and saw you said already that your were foster to adopt and recommended that way. Thanks. I am afraid of all the extra things you need to do. Am I just being a baby? Is it pretty simple...example, the locked medicine cabinet, escape plans, all the tests, the fire retardant, and all the other items needed. Any help on this?
We keep a fire extinguisher downstairs within reach. We posted escape plans on the wall upstairs and downstairs (simple map of each floor's layout with exits marked) and the CW said she'd never seen anyone who actually had that done. Our "locked medicine cabinet" is a little filing cabinet next to the couch. The top drawer holds video games, the bottom holds medicine. It's nice having a lockable cabinet. My 3 yr old likes to break DVDs and CDs. Don't you still have to follow basic safety rules even if you just go straight adoption?
We keep the sharp knives in the wooden block on top of our fridge. We don't "have" to do the baby proofing now that we aren't accepting foster babies, but we do it anyway because we currently have a baby who is just now mobile.
Honestly, the rules aren't any different from what any good parent would do to be safe. Fire drills aren't a big deal either. They don't specify how you have to do it. We don't have kids climbing out windows. We have them point to the exits from every room. And we practice what to do if you wake up with smoke in your room. They know to meet at the neighbor's house. Once again, all stuff you'd want to cover regularly with your kids.
Jess
Do you need gates at the top of stairs? We moved in our house when my son was 1 month old and I just taught him how to crawl down backwards until it was safe for him to walk (learned that at a daycare I worked at). Yes, you are right a lot of things should just be done anyways, but I just skipped some of them and taught my kids what to and not to do so I would have to go back now and do all those baby proofing things. I don't have anything covering my outlets at the moment and the knives are in the drawer. I am glad to hear that the cabinet could be any locking cabinet. I thought it had to be a special expensive medicine cabinet. Any other helpful ideas on how "easy" it may be to foster. I don't know why I feel more tense about all the items to on the list.
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We put our meds on a very high shelf (approx 7 feet high) in the closet. They said, "No." They said a toddler cabinet lock was fine. I showed them my under the sink cabinet lock. They said that was fine. Well, that was silly my 1 yo opened that a week later. I bought a little box at Walmart. It has a simple key like a diary might have. They said that was fine. It isn't very big. It is probably big enough for 4x6 index cards. I think they come in bigger sizes. We have one down stairs and one upstairs. It holds the basics. The rest of the miscellaneous meds we have in a locked closet.
Our knives are on the counter in a wood block. We did not have the stairs gated. We made fire escape plans and posted them. I thought that was pretty silly since we didn't plan to take in kids old enough to read it. After the inspection, we took the signs down. We had to buy certain fire extinguishers to make them happy.
It was all very irritating but not that difficult.
I would've assumed they would be checking still every so often to make sure you have them still posted???
My wife and I want to adopt siblings - like the 5 children in Kentucky that we saw on adoption.com. My wife and I are in very good health even though she is 55 and I am 52. i know there is an age maximum of about 40. But we are both retired teachers - and we continue to work part-time in a second career where we have free reign when we want to work. Would a state - like Kentucky - work with us regarding our ages since we would consider siblings.....like the 5 I mentioned? Thank you!
Ours is a very different situation. We have 7 children of our own, who are all quickly growing (3 are grown and in the process of becoming independent).
All of a sudden, out of nowhere, without ever really considering it, (we haven't gone through the foster system) we became guardians to a sibling group of 3 little ones: 5 mos, 2 and 3 yrs.
CPS has asked us, depending on how things go, if we would be willing to file for full custody. My initial response was "yes". But all of the waiting and uncertainty (CPS informs us of NOTHING) is wearing on us. If it had gone from the mother handing us her children to KNOWING that we were going to have the children permanently, I think it would be OK. How do you handle not knowing what the future holds?
CPS could come today and give the kids back to their mother. And our attachment is made stronger every day. My stomach turns when I think about it.
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The waiting is so hard. I don't know how you do it once they are in your house! We are waiting to see if we will be considered for a sibling group and it's driving me crazy.
I hope for the best for you and the children.
I adopted a sibling group a couple years ago, I'm new to this forum. At the time of their adoption (3.5 years ago) they were 8, 6, 5, 3, 2, and 1.