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dear everyone,
i'm not really sure where to post this exactly, but i am hoping someone will spare their time in helping me with this.
my birthday is coming up, june 15th! and i want to get... the information file? from when i was adopted. i don't even know what its called, or how to go about getting it? do i go to the agency, call them.... or what?
what do i ask for?
i basically want any information i can get. and i was also wondering if i could get the name of my birthfather? would that even be listed? would i have to pay?
i basically need all this explained to me, and how adoption documents/records really work, because i have NO idea.
all i really need is his name etc, because birthmom refuses to tell me because its too painful for her.
please someone explain to me how this works, how i should go about getting any information at all, and basically explain it to me the best you can.
i know it will probably be alot to explain, but it would really mean alot to me so that i am not going into this blindfolded!!
I can give you a little bit to start
First I would check out PA Adoption Medical History Registry, it is a voluntary program but that medical information can be sooo important. You can find out more about it at:
[url]http://www.adoptpakids.org/paemedicalhist.asp[/url]
You can also find the forms at any Court of Common Pleas in PA
Second - have you asked your adoptive parents what information they have?
Thirdly- Yes you can contact your agency, I have heard of some agnecies charging fees, but it varies.
I see you have contact with your birthmom and she indicates the info is too painful to share, so hopefully another birthmom here might have some suggestions
Diane
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Dear Diane,
thanks for the advice. i have talked with my birthmom for a short time, and i did ask about my birthfather. she told me it was very painful and she couldnt talk about it at the time. she told me she would write me a letter in a week. That was in March, and i still havent heard from her. i know it is because she hasnt told her husband about me. soo shes kind of stuck right now.
also, i was born in west jersey... but my aparents were/are from pa. so i think i need to ask my parents about the agency too.
also, i have asked my aparents what information they know, mostly my amom because she talked to my birthmom lots of times and even met her. she told me that birthmom wasnt sure and described three men to her two dark featured and one blonde hair, green eyes. and i have blonde hair and green eyes. but thats really all she knew about him.
also, my birthmom posted an ad in a magazine? or newspaper i forget and my aparents responded to it. my birthmom wanted VERY little, as little as possible to do with the agency, but had to for the legal part.
so that brings me to square one about my birthfather, which i have zero information about.
oh and also, i know that the man she thinks is my birthfather...
was getting married to his fiance. so does he even know about me?
thanks for helping!!
Bridgette,
You really didn't provide a lot of information in your question. I'm in your shoes as I know who my bmom is, but have no clue as to my dad. I have lots of questions. You also sounded a bit desperate.. may I ask why? No matter who your b parents are.. you are who you are.. and that's a wonderful thing.
I'm not here often but would love to talk with you. please contact me at teuthida at excite dot com. I have so many questions.