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I am new "here", but not to the adoption world. We have a 3 yr old DD that we got at birth through a domestic open adoption.. We have been officially waiting for #2 for 5 months with the same domestic agency in Alberta.
I am starting to go a little stir crazy during the wait. We only waited 6 months for our DD. So I have "little" experience waiting and even less being patient. No one really understands how I feel except those who have BTDT or are going through it . Just looking for some support, any ideas for coping or words or advice. Or if others are waiting and want to chat.
Pooh:)
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Darn! :( Would have liked to attend. I know that they have something similar here in Calgary but don't know when or where. Communication is not always that clear from ACS...
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First of all...if you cannot use your agency I think it is incredibly wrong that they frown on you going to another agency. I realize you wouldn't, but this does not sit well with me, not one bit.
I was invited to an adoption fair a few years ago, since we were not at all interested in older child adoption we didn't go. I think it was AO who put it on....perhaps call around to the different agencies and see if they know anything about another one?
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Nice to hear from you. What kind of wait did CFS give you? Are you waiting for a baby? older child? Is this your first child?
Sorry to hear your agency won't let you adopt thru them, but of course the money issue always comes into play.
We are waiting with AO for over 5 months now for #2, Were in Calgary as well.
:)
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Leigh131313
First of all...if you cannot use your agency I think it is incredibly wrong that they frown on you going to another agency. I realize you wouldn't, but this does not sit well with me, not one bit.
Truth be told, I wasn't too pleased either. It actually made getting our home assessment done quite difficult too because the private agencies are contracted by ACS to do most of the home assessments for them, so I had to wait until a private contractor was available, and from what I have seen, they aren't nearly as efficient at getting assessments done as the private agencies (both ours and the other agencies). :grr:
Leigh131313
I was invited to an adoption fair a few years ago, since we were not at all interested in older child adoption we didn't go. I think it was AO who put it on....perhaps call around to the different agencies and see if they know anything about another one?
I know ACS does Adoption Fairs, just not sure when the next one is. I have a contact at the Calgary Adoptive Parent Society and I am going to see if she knows anything. :)
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Poohbear2003
What kind of wait did CFS give you? Are you waiting for a baby? older child? Is this your first child?
CFS didn't give us any idea at all. :( I guess it will really depend on when our home assessment is actually FINISHED. :mad:
Poohbear2003
We are waiting with AO for over 5 months now for #2, Were in Calgary as well.
I don't work at AO - I am at the "other" agency, however it was VERY quiet this spring/summer for all the private agencies, Alberta wide. It has been a bit NUTS since the beginning of September. If we have really picked up, AO probably has too, so hopefully that will help!! I know one problem we have had with a few files lately is that we don't have enough copies of their "Dear Birthmother" letters and photos and so we can not show their file to another birth mother, so if you only have one or two at the agency, you might want to make some more!
Carrie
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Hopefully, (or maybe wishful thinking) we will all have our new children by Christmas.
Keeping fingers crossed for everyone.
:)
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Oh, don't cross them for me!! Our homestudy isn't even aproved yet. Cross them extra for someone else :) lol
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We are going for #2 through FCS. My first DD was adopted 2 years ago.(CAme home almost 2 years, officially adopted last October. She is now 11 years old.)
Our home study is completed. Now we wait. I am going nuts waiting. Tonight I am being impatient with waiting.
JEwel
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JewelMarie
We are going for #2 through FCS. My first DD was adopted 2 years ago.(CAme home almost 2 years, officially adopted last October. She is now 11 years old.)
Our home study is completed. Now we wait. I am going nuts waiting. Tonight I am being impatient with waiting.
JEwel
Welcome. I know some days are worse than others while you wait. What kind of wait do you expect? Wishing you all the best
Pooh
DD 3 adopted at birth
Waiting for #2 via doemstic agency
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Welcome Welcome!
I for one am having a hard week. Not because of waiting..i'm still ok with that (thankfully)
But, it seems EVERYONE is announcing they are pregnant this week. I'm not jealous....I'm not sure WHAT I feel...but I am definitely having a reaction...
that and it seems the topic of labor and delivery is a constant these days....and I am really sick to death of it.
and I dont care about post partum (sp?) depression or breast feeding....and I'm done talking about it.
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Leigh131313
Welcome Welcome!
I for one am having a hard week. Not because of waiting..i'm still ok with that (thankfully)
But, it seems EVERYONE is announcing they are pregnant this week. I'm not jealous....I'm not sure WHAT I feel...but I am definitely having a reaction...
that and it seems the topic of labor and delivery is a constant these days....and I am really sick to death of it.
and I dont care about post partum (sp?) depression or breast feeding....and I'm done talking about it.
Sigh... Leigh, why do you have to live all the way down there?? I left two playdates early in the last couple weeks because that is all they could talk about... their pregnancies, deliveries, and on and on. I don't really begrudge them the experience at all but really, it wasn't like it happened yesterday or anything. Couldn't we, at least part of the time, talk about something else considering they know that I don't have anything to share. I did say that at one point when one of the gals turned to me and said "you're being awfully quiet" and I just said (I am surprised I didn't start crying) that I didn't have anything to add as I had never had that experience. Ah well... (((hugs)))) to you ... I've experienced this too...
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Leigh131313
Welcome Welcome!
I for one am having a hard week. Not because of waiting..i'm still ok with that (thankfully)
But, it seems EVERYONE is announcing they are pregnant this week. I'm not jealous....I'm not sure WHAT I feel...but I am definitely having a reaction...
that and it seems the topic of labor and delivery is a constant these days....and I am really sick to death of it.
and I dont care about post partum (sp?) depression or breast feeding....and I'm done talking about it.
Sorry you are feeling bad. I can understand how you feel. Emma is in preschool and I think I am the only parent with one child and I feel yucky since it is not by choice. So many women were PG when it first started and since had their babies and it hurts. So many people were Pg when we were waiting for "Emma" and it broke my heart everytime I heard it. I had depression for quite a few days after yet another PG announcement. It isn't as bad this time, but I think it helps already having one child.
I hate when people always go back to talk about pregnancy, labor and delivery. And their kids are OLDER!!!! Really??? Is that the most important part? I cannot imagine so. Having the child is what matters, yet so many people alway talk about their pregancies and thats when i get uncomfortable and of course draw back from any conversation. Hugs to you. I know I have been there.
Pooh
DD 3 yrs adopted at birth
waiting for #2 for almost 6 months
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Thanks for the welcome.
We are going for an older child, hopefully around five or six.
I totally understand about walking out on conversations about pregnancy. On Wednesday my co-workers were sitting there discussing pregnancy and I just came out and said, "well some of us are not so lucky with biology so we have to grow our families through adoption." Then I said, "thank God we can adopt children needing homes" I walked away.
That day my mouth had no control. lol
Anyway, it is hard waiting and hear people talk about pregnancy like it is the world. I am sure they mean well but it is hard for the mom waiting for their child.
Jewel
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