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There is a woman...
24 years ago, this woman made a difficult decision, because of circumstances that remian irrelavent...
After carrying the entity within herself for months on end, the woman decided that once it was to enter this world... seeing it would only make the decision vanish... that she could not follow through with it once it was held in her arms.
Cold, frightened, screaming... the entity immersed, covered in the fluid that provided warmth, nurishment, and comfort to it, now dripping to the floor taking with it, all it had been to the entity.
Wisked away... Confused, and overwhelmed with sensorys and images, so traumatic the entity can only now begin to imagine what took place. 24 years later.
The entity sits now. Unable to sleep. Now realising he resides only 10 mins away from the place she set him forth, seeking whatever means possible to provide an outlet for the feelings brewing deep within its concious.
Searching, hoping, endlessly sifting through a maze of others like himself, wishing that maybe...just maybe... there is a woman, doing the same thing.
There is a woman.
This woman, gave life to a wonderful being. A being full of flaws. A being full of love. A being full of a thirst for knowledge, understanding, and wisdom.
This woman, who so long ago chose to sacrifice her love, so that this being could experience a life that she could not provide... deserves resolution.
This woman, deserves rest. Her outstretched arms long to embrace this being, have done so, in knowing. Knowing that this being would one day feel, and understand there lies an untold connection between them. Knowing that this being would one day seek to find her.
This woman deserves to know that her decision was one that truly fullfilled its intentions, and that this being holds no remorse or anger towards her for doing so.
That this being wants nothing more now than to see her once again, for the first time. To see and feel the complex organism, whos cells produced him. To embrace...This woman.
Mom.
Whatever your reasons. Leave them behind.
Find me.
Help me find you.
With your name, with your face... Only then will the woman become complete to me.
And with that, I can thank her.
A beautiful outreach.......good luck to you......and to your birth mother......the connection impacts both 'entities' forever......
benedicta...vicky
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BesideYouInTime~
Your post is amazing. It really captures so much of the process... so much of the longing to connect. Your thoughts and emotions really resenated with me. Good luck with your search.
PastorStephanie
Thats was beautiful besideintime. My mum could not handle meeting me when I tracked her down back in 1997. As a consequence i never met her and she passed away in Sep this year. Since then i have met her eldest son by marraige who is a beautiful person. But the guilt I feel from the union with swanny coming from her death is terrible. Please continue your journey and i wish you all the success in your quest
Wow...
How intense and how true.
"This woman deserves to know that her decision was one that truly fullfilled its intentions, and that this being holds no remorse or anger towards her for doing so.
That this being wants nothing more now than to see her once again, for the first time. To see and feel the complex organism, whos cells produced him. To embrace...This woman."
I have made the decision to pursue a search. I am 33. I have to admit that I envy friends who take for granted their families and how they "fit in" somehow. It answers so many questions...yet, are we always thankful for these answers? I wonder. I cannot wonder any longer..I must search....
DRL
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besideyouintime
There is a woman...
24 years ago, this woman made a difficult decision, because of circumstances that remian irrelavent...
After carrying the entity within herself for months on end, the woman decided that once it was to enter this world... seeing it would only make the decision vanish... that she could not follow through with it once it was held in her arms.
Cold, frightened, screaming... the entity immersed, covered in the fluid that provided warmth, nurishment, and comfort to it, now dripping to the floor taking with it, all it had been to the entity.
Wisked away... Confused, and overwhelmed with sensorys and images, so traumatic the entity can only now begin to imagine what took place. 24 years later.
The entity sits now. Unable to sleep. Now realising he resides only 10 mins away from the place she set him forth, seeking whatever means possible to provide an outlet for the feelings brewing deep within its concious.
Searching, hoping, endlessly sifting through a maze of others like himself, wishing that maybe...just maybe... there is a woman, doing the same thing.
There is a woman.
This woman, gave life to a wonderful being. A being full of flaws. A being full of love. A being full of a thirst for knowledge, understanding, and wisdom.
This woman, who so long ago chose to sacrifice her love, so that this being could experience a life that she could not provide... deserves resolution.
This woman, deserves rest. Her outstretched arms long to embrace this being, have done so, in knowing. Knowing that this being would one day feel, and understand there lies an untold connection between them. Knowing that this being would one day seek to find her.
This woman deserves to know that her decision was one that truly fullfilled its intentions, and that this being holds no remorse or anger towards her for doing so.
That this being wants nothing more now than to see her once again, for the first time. To see and feel the complex organism, whos cells produced him. To embrace...This woman.
Mom.
Whatever your reasons. Leave them behind.
Find me.
Help me find you.
With your name, with your face... Only then will the woman become complete to me.
And with that, I can thank her.
Hi - I was really touched by what you wrote. I am a birth mom of a 38 yr old daughter. I am trying to make contact with her, but have had no response back from her yet. Any birth mom would be proud to call you hers. I hope she sees your post, and that you can meet her. Good luck with your search.
humbird753 :thanks: