We didn't pay any. It was included in our agency fee. Personally, I wouldn't go with an agency that adds on birthmother expenses to their costs -- there are plenty of agencies out there that don't.
Just wondering what the average amount you guys have paid for birth mother expenses?
We didn't pay anything. It's illegal here.
Yeah we're a bit sceptical about it... our agency says its not mandatory but they ask how much you are "willing" to pay. Of course if the Birthmom is asking for certain fees & we refuse then they will move onto another couple who IS willing to pay. But if the Birthmom decides not to place at the last minute that money is non-refundable. So we're thinking, what happens if we had 2 or 3 failed placements and paid out money each time...we'd be down that money which we don't even HAVE to begin with. Seems so unfair!!
We didn't pay any birthmom expenses. She was on medicaid for her medical bills and any incidental expenses came out of our agency fees.
My daughters parent's didn't pay any expenses - I didn't ask for any...however if I had, they would have had to pay those expnese on top of the *cough* 40K plus fees they were already paying - and it would have been non-refundable.
Check out some adoption sites to research what the law is in your state as well as states where you might match. Sometimes it helps to know what is 'allowed' by the states involved.
Some states don't have hard and fast rules...but some do :)
Last update on November 29, 7:06 am by Sachin Gupta.
We paid less than $3K. DS's mom was in a really difficult situation, however. She hadn't initially wanted anything, but there was an emergency situation. She hated asking us, but really, of all the fees we paid (and there were plenty), these didn't bother me at all. We adopted in MO, and all expenses had to be approved by the court, after the birthmother had placed. I'm not sure, if she had decided to parent, how the money situation would have worked.
Our birthmother really dosent want anything and neither does her family. She is only 15 and lives with her mom, dad takes her every other weekend. I did buy her maternity clothes but she let me buy very little, only $80 worth of stuff, we know that dosen't go far. I also took her out to dinner that night. She is a friend of the family and we will be getting together every other Saturday from here on out just so we can talk about things and get to know a little more about her. Its amazing, you know someone so long but then realize you don't know much at all. Also she is on medicade for her hospital bills. We were going to pay for a prescription the other day but it turned out she didnt have a copay. I have no problem providing her with what she needs as far as clothes and things go, her family really does not have the money.