Baptising after finalization

We didn't have to have it finalized, didn't have to show any paperwork. I'm not sure I agree with this either...but it does show how seriously they take baptism (which is good). Thank goodness because we don't finalize until 6 months after placement (which will HOPEFULLY be next Friday).

We have to be finalized to baptize, too. Our older son was 8 mos old the day he was baptized. We are finalizing next Thursday for our second son, who is 7.5 mos old now and I already called to get the baptism date....they don't have anything available until the end of September. *Sigh* But at least we have a date. In the meantime, the receptionist said they will need a copy of his adoption decree beforehand. Natalie - Congrats on your finalization, too! --Renee

My situation is that my finalization attorney had originally told us that finalization would happen at the end of July...he swore to it. He had told us that way back in May. With that in mind...we set a baptism date of September 16th. We filled out all the papers and stuff, and got everything notarized as instructed...but he has made excuse after excuse about why we were not getting a finalization date. He then told us we had a choice of 8/10 or 8/24...we choose the 10th. He then denied saying that. I am supposed to call back today to find out for sure. Anyway...the catholic church told me that they will not do the baptism until finalization and/or birth certificate in hand. Now I don't know what to do.

Gosh, I'm feeling thankful now. I never expected any problems at all - just wanted to have him baptized as soon as possible. We were even able to rush things once we felt ready to set a date because my parents were heading out of town for 2 months, so they got us in during Advent even...We didn't have to show anything - not even the placement papers. I think it was a fairly unusual thing for our small parish, and it seems many of the decisions about this are diocese-specific. A was baptized when he was 2 months old, and we finalized in the next month.

He told me "rules are rules" and that he was worried that the baby would be taken away after he had baptized her. I assured him that the bp's rights were long ago signed away and that we have had her since she was 2 days old (she is now 7.5 months). I told him that the attorney offered to write a letter saying that our petition has been filed with the court...so he said "have the attorney earn his money and right the letter...and I will make my decision". The attorney did write the letter...but it is kind of vague. I guess the only thing I can do is pray that the 24th of August really does happen.

Some priests are just old and cranky, and it may be just the priest. Don't forget you always have baptism by desire, so your child is covered regardless. It's just nice to actually receive the sacrament in a church. The priest might be hesitant to baptize a child before the adoption is finalizes because in baptism you promise to raise that child according to the teachings of the church, so the priest may be looking at it as if something happens and the child is removed from your home, then you're not able to fulfill the promise you made to raise the child Catholic. I also know of a child who wants to make his first communion, but his parents are divorced and his mom doesn't want him to make it. The child keeps asking his grandmother, who works for one of the churchs, to sign up for the classes to receive the sacrament, but the diocese has turned him down because the mom isn't on board with it. She's not even Catholic, so I don't fully understand why she even gets a say in it, but she is the parent with primary custody, so what she says goes according to the diocese.

Wow, I never had a problem getting my son baptized within a few months of his birth. I was never asked or questioned about finalizing his adoption.

The white attire symbolizes that a change (spiritual) is about to take place in his/her life. It may be a white or antique white simple dress if it is a girl and if boy he may wear blue trausers with a white shirt.

I am so glad that I read this thread. I was wondering how baptism worked the other day. Glad to have advance knowledge.

We just met with the priest and had to actually provide a copy of the final adoption before our son can be baptized. We wanted so much to have him baptized as soon as possible, however this could not happen they wanted the adoption paperwork. So now this weekend actually we are out looking for his little outfit..and then we can set up the date. We so look forward to this happening...finally!!

Saddened that today was supposed to be our finalization date...but again that was cancelled due to the lawyer not having the right papers from the adoption agency. sigh. I called the priest and spoke to him at length. He told me to have the lawyer get him another letter stating that the papers are filed with the court. The lawyer sent it....and after much discussion, the priest told me that he will do the baptism for us on the 16th even if it is not finalized yet. He said we can get him the birth certificate after the baptism. Well, at least that is one thing I don't have to worry about anymore.Now....on to another date for finalization.

All - it seems each Parish and, in some cases, each Diocese has it's rules. As far as we were able to discern (with the help of a long time priest friend "in the know") there is no Canon Law forbidding Baptism prior to finalization of your adoption. What it takes is communication with your (a) parish pastor; (b) parish Baptism coordinator;(c) home study agency; (d) your attorney; and (d) if necessary, the Archdiocese itself. We starting speaking with out pastor and Baptrism coordinator as soon as we returned home with DD. Our home study agency SW told us they would support our request with a letter to the Pastor explaining where we are in the process and that we are rightfully in custody of DD. Our lawyer helped as well giving us the ifnormation we needed to clearly explain our legal position. Speaking personally to our Pastor and the Baptism coordinator and telling them ours and DD's story along with the fact that they see us at Mass every week and always stop to ask how DD is progressing sealed the deal. We are still many months from final and DD was Baptized yesterday surrounded by over 100 family and friends in a celebration of Baptism the likes of which I've never witnessed. Our priest friend (I've known him over 30 years!) gave us an incredibly personal Ritual and included two special prayers we requested; one a blessing for DD's b-mom and one a blessing on us not only as parents, but specifically as APs. I'm happy to provide the two prayers to any who are interested. Long story short, it is possible to have your baby Baptized prior to finalization but it takes a lot of homework and a lot of communication. Feel free to PM me for our "recipe" for success. Peace!

I've gotta tell you guys . . . we've never waited. We've baptized our children (4) at two different churches and both priests were wonderful, know that our children are adopted (because we used them for references) and NEVER even suggested that we had to wait. If I was in a parish with a priest who gave us a hard time about it, I'd find another parish. Seriously, I can't respect a priest who would hold back on baptizing a child. That's just not the way God works.

We didn't wait until the finalization to baptize either of our boys (who both happened to be born in December...2 years apart) - we waited until after the first placement hearing because that's how our agency told us that it worked (we went through Catholic Services of Macomb in Michigan). However, both of our boys were 5 months old at their baptism because we had to wait until the end of Lent. Our church never even questioned where we were in the adoption proceedings.

We are not Catholic so it never occurred to me to baptize before finalization. This upset my dear Catholic friend no end, and when it finally did happen, at age 7 months, she was right there on the front row, even tho it meant she had to go to church twice that day.