Schedule

I think babies self regulate themselves pretty well. It wasn't until my baby was 6 - 8 weeks old that we got on a good schedule....I would just try to keep the same routine for a while, and see if you notice any scheduling happening naturally (like C always started getting tired 2 hours after he woke...and then 2 hours after lunch) we also helped a little by trying to keep him feeding every 3 hours or so. I wasn't FORCEFUL with it (if he was really hungry, we'd feed him) but we didn't rush the bottle with the first fuss KWIM? It's REALLY hard and I think the hardest time for me was between 4 - 8 weeks. You still aren't getting sleep...the "honeymoon" is over...and your baby is usually not responding well yet (smiling, cooing, etc). ****hugs*****

The best book I found was Secrets of the Baby Whisperer. She talks about getting the baby on a "routine" (which is responsive to your needs and the baby's) rather than a schedule (which is rigid). It sounds like semantics, but I really don't think it is. The basic gist of it is: feed your baby when he wakes up, then play for a while before going back to sleep. Eat, play, sleep works well to help the LO learn to fall asleep well. (Or at least it worked really well for me until DS was about 7 months. . . then all h*ll broke loose!) She does not believe in crying it out. The bottom line is, I don't know if her system is better than anyone else's, but it helped me develop confidence and a sense of control over my life. I LOVED that book, and recommend it to all my friends!

I agree w/ Char & Vogi---there's a lot of difference between a schedule and a routine. H was pretty easy about most of this, but now that I look back, I can see that we instinctively did things that probably contributed to that: I made all the day's bottles at once, so I could feed him right away and not let him work himself up crying. We played music for him a lot--- classical or lullaby helped him go back to sleep after the nighttime feedings, which we tried to do w/ only a soft nightlight. For daytime feedings, I brought him into a room w/ lots of windows & sunlight----I may be crazy, but I think that helped him establish his body clock. Try to make things easy on yourself, too---you being calm and in control is a HUGE influence on baby. I stashed diapers, changing pads & wipes in decorative containers in all the rooms where I was likely to be w/ him for easy changes w/out running up & down the stairs all the time. H took bottles cold, so we put nighttime ones in a dorm sized fridge upstairs. I did NOT try to keep the house superquiet during naps, so he learned to sleep through the dogs barking, the doorbell, the vacuum, etc. I felt like the more quickly I attended to his needs at that stage, the more time for snuggling and bonding, the more secure he felt, and thus, the better he slept (and the better we slept!)

I think one month is too early and would cause a lot of frustration in the trying. But that's just me. IF (and some kids do!!!) your child is ready to have a schedule (speaking of sleeping, eating is different) they'll put themselves on it. If you keep track, you'll see them falling asleep at the same time, etc. OTOH, if your child is like mine, it was about 4 months until I started seeing the need and possibility. I just started laying him down (did better with second child than first, who never laid down ~ LOL! ~ until she was a year old!!! That's a joke, but you get the picture) about two hours after he woke up the last time. So if he woke up at 7am, he'd be down for his morning nap by 9am or so, and on and on. Definitely worked for him as he was still taking three naps at 13 months and sleeping through the night by seven months, which was pretty good at our house. My first child, well, her schedule screwups were all my fault. I wanted her to be on one but couldn't bring myself to give her the chance as I wanted her with me all the time. She slept lots while I was wearing her or in her bassinet wherever I was, I would just lay her down AFTER she was asleep. And it made it harder when at 9 months we had to face the facts that she wasn't sleeping and we were exhausted and she needed a schedule or we did at least. It was a lot harder then. ETA: My favorite book on sleep is [URL="http://www.amazon.com/Healthy-Sleep-Habits-Happy-Child/dp/0345486455/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/105-7383507-8853217?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1193321206&sr=8-1"]Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child [/URL]by Marc Weissbluth. I've read and re-read and made Hubby read it. Truly a lifesaver...

Great posts and advice from other posters!I think as long as you are not to rigid with the schedule and lean more toward a routine, your daughter is not to young to start getting on board. Eat, wake/play time, then down to sleep on their own worked best for us. I tried not to 'nurse him to sleep' which gave him a fuller feed and helped DS learned to sooth himself very young, which has really helped his sleep habits.Another great book (sounds very much like the one Char mentioned) is Becoming Babywise. We had DS on a routine by about 4 or 6 weeks and sleeping 8 hours by 8 weeks, 12 by 12 weeks. And as Char said, worked great until about 7 or 8 months when all heck broke lose! There is a Becoming Babywise II for 6 to 18 months. Wish I would have gotten that one too! LOLGood Luck, and Congrats!

First, sorry such a long reply, I kept remembering things! I would say at your son's age, maybe just watch and see if he has any kind of routine yet, then try to to introduce a little more at a time. Before eight weeks, our baby could not stay awake after eating. A couple friends said I should keep her awake after eating and they gave me ideas, but she was really unhappy, and I felt silly forcing her to stay awake when she needed to sleep just because it should fit the schedule. So I didn't do that. Then she turned eight weeks old, and mostly stayed awake after eating just because she did. With our baby, who is now 15 months, I thought I was supposed to do a schedule with her as a newborn. Many friends who had babies before us talked about scheduling, and I thought that was what I needed to do. I even asked the doctor at the hospital what kind of schedule to put her on. :rolleyes: I started keeping a log day 3, keeping track of when she ate, slept, wake time. I did keep the log for laughs (well, NOW I can laugh, at the time it was not funny). That log never showed any kind of consistency, no matter what I tried. After a few weeks of that, no more. I called some friends and asked what to do, because she was inconsistent on sleeping and eating. Some said schedule. Some said routine. Some said let the baby do what she needs to do and when. Then one friend said her first child never was on a schedule, the second child put herself on a schedule after 8 weeks, and her third child watned a rigid schedule since the day he was born. So I let the scheduling idea go for us, and it was much better, although we had a morning routine and evening routine we followed. At eight months our baby did get into a predictable schedule. I really think that what works best is what fits both you and your baby. Some babies like a structured schedule, others do not. I am convinced that no matter what I tried, and I think I tried everything, to get ours on a schedule, it was just not her. I did read both the Babywise book and the Baby Whisperer book hoping it would help, but she was just not a structured baby during the day. We were both happier when we went with the flow. I know other people have liked those books, and was helpful for them, so you could try. I have also heard that the Healthy Sleep Habits book is also good. The two best advice books for me was the American Academy of Pediatrics which said something along the lines of "you know your baby, respond to their needs, and no book can tell you exactly when or how long your baby should sleep." In What to Expect the First Year, at five months and still an unpredictable napper, that chapter said some babies take three long naps at that age, others may take five 20 minute cat naps. After this long response, I guess my gist is, if you like structure, slowly ease it in, and your baby may respond to it. But I recommend not forcing it. You are both adjusting to new life--it can be hard. Best wishes to you, and finding something that is helpful to you and your baby!

I remember keeping a log--just to verify that I wasn't crazy--there was no pattern whatsoever! We were very lucky though, that M always slept pretty well at night. Somewhere around 5 months I read somewhere that babies typically have a sleepy window about 2 hours after waking--and once I found that gem to be true, everything else fell into place. I'd say 1 month is awfully young to try for a schedule, but a pattern/routine of the day is important. Your baby will tell you what he needs!

I had to laugh at the idea of a baby putting themselves on a schedule! :D (And are you SURE your baby did their own schedule, or did they just pick up on the household routine more quickly than other babies??) I've not had any who did that. I envy those who do. I've also not met a child who didn't benefit from some structure. This isn't just my kids, but my foster kids, my friends' kids, etc. Kids are happier and more secure with predictability. I didn't always have a schedule for the kids, but we've always had a routine. Now that I have more kids and more demands on my time we have more of a Consistent Routine; that is, a routine with some times that don't change. :DNap and bed times are always within 15 minutes of the same time. (Sanity is important, not only for the child but for the parent.) If we get off this by too much we have problems as it tweaks the next thing in the routine with a kind of negative domino effect. I have a chronic health condition that demands that my meal times are roughly the same time each day, so meal times are very consistent. Having a routine for yourself helps the baby develop one, too. Having said that, I still don't always get a shower and into real clothes before 2 p.m.!! :evilgrin:I also liked the book "On Becoming Babywise". I found it helpful to know what to look for in order to know that the baby had eaten enough, that they were gaining weight along the right track, etc. I also was relieved to be able to know that if the baby was crying I had a better idea of WHY. With a routine I knew when they'd likely be hungry, when they were tired, etc. It wasn't all this huge unmapped wilderness with no compass. I liked this book for another suggestion they have about the importance of training a baby to be able to play independently in their little space for a short stretch. I'm not saying unsupervised play for hours, but rather that 5-15 minutes, depending on age, that gives you time to go to the bathroom or make a business call - all with line of sight supervision, of course. (And yes, it has been years since I've gone into the bathroom and closed the door.)I have older toddlers (a 2 yo and a 3 yo) who have very consistent routines. This helps so very much! I usually know why they are being crabby or nasty, just by looking at the clock. Additionally, I have special needs kids and I've seen the gigantic benefit having consistent and predictable days has made for them.