November is National Adoption Awareness Month!!

Is it bad that I hate November. First, my relatives came and took my son November 20 and then I just cannot celebrate National Adoption Month. That may sound selfish, but how do I celebrate something I never wanted???? Bring on December!

Hi Josh's Mom... I think it's quite understandable that you hate November. As for celebrating adoption month... why should you? Recognize however, that unless we learn to let go of the past, the emotions like hate continue to eat us away. (I'm REALLY tired of being a watering pot in October!) However, doing things like encouraging your local library to feature books on adoption (from all sides) could help raise awareness of ALL the issues and sides.

... I never thought about approaching our local library and asking them to carry more books on adoption, or to feature some of them during national adoption month. Thanks for the idea... it will certainly be easier to carry out than the last task I assigned myself (card to amom). It would be nice if there were a list of books -- as in, the list being on one or two pages rather than spread throughout the website in various posts and threads. Does such exist here? Thanks, Kathy... Susan :flowergift:

Susan....we actually don't have a compiled list of books, but what a great suggestion and I will get to work on that!!:) Thanks for thinking of it! Josh'smom - I'm sorry November is such a rough month for you! Please know that our focus on November is really directed at the waiting children in foster care. So many kids age out each year not having a family and all the other things that go along with it is something we hope to educate on. Kathy made a great point...with the books and overall education on adoption. There are a lot of suggestions on the calendar that can be used for your own thoughts too. For instance, there's one day where we suggest writing to your state senator regarding your concerns on adoption. Maybe how first moms are treated, not treated etc. can be something you write about. Or an adoptee can write and say "we need our medical information outright!" etc. I do understand though that it might seem like a slap in the face having this on a birth family forum, but please know that isn't our intention at all. It is more about awareness and hopes to find kids without homes a family and all that comes with the foster care system etc. :)

I don't know of such a list... I'll start a thread and maybe someone will tell us... or we'll create one in one place!

My own father aged out of the foster care system when he turned 18 in 1943. He wasn't allowed to finish high school, because he was 18 and there were no more funds to provide for him. He was just 18, a senior in high school, when he joined the military and went to fight a war. He was the oldest of six children, and both of his parents died by the time he was 14. They separated all the kids... some went to family members, but there wasn't enough family for all the kids. My dad and his sister were sent to the juvenile detention facililty. They were assigned separate floors: girls and boys. He spent a year in that facility, living one floor apart from his baby sister, and he never got to see her during that year's time. When he and my mom got married, he got a congratulatory telegram from his foster parents. I met them once when I was younger, but the contact and connection was not really family-like. I know my dad wanted to have a family, and he tried to keep connections with his foster family, but I think they saw themselves as having "done their job" (no disrespect intended)... I don't think they thought they were in it for the long haul. It was very sad, and I'll never forget the disappointment in my father's face when they weren't all excited when he brought his family (proud dad to four children with beautiful wife) to meet them. He never brought us back to visit them again. And, we were totally well-behaved children, so I know it wasn't us -- there just wasn't a long-term connection, on the foster parents' side anyway. I hope that all the kids in foster care eventually find a family who will be there for the long haul. This needs to be a priority in our country. Thanks for letting me vent... In memory of my dad, Bernie: 1925-1987 Peace, Susan :flowergift:

Venting is good!

Thanks for sharing that Susan....((HUGS)) Your dad sounds like he was one heck of a man!:)

Kathy - I agree a list of books would be nice. It would really be nice to portray all sides. Crick - I am so with you. I feel for those kids. It makes me angier when I read in the newspaper, "pregnant - we would love to provide a stable home for your baby - call Mark and Gina" or whatever. Our local Children's Museum has a wall of the kids in the system. Everytime I go to the Museum, I want to take them all home with me. Granted, many of these kids have some challenge or another, but UGH it tears at the heart. I wish the focus for people would be getting these children homes. I think that is why I have little respect for my relatives. They were so focused on taking advantage of a situation that would provide them with a baby, they did harm not good. I would have respect for them had they left me alone and focused on making a home for a child left in a state home or foster care. Sorry for the length!!! Wow - I think I am going to the Children's museum at lunch to see if there are any changes to their pictures.

We're trying to create a list of books on adoption. To add your favorite books to the list, [URL="http://forums.adoption.com/birth-family-healing-recovery-success/315669-input-needed-recommend-books-adoption.html"]go here[/URL] Josh's Mom, I agree, but I also think that it takes special people to raise foster children, not everyone who wants to adopt should try to raise foster kids.