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Well my wait wasn't that long as I am adopting through the foster care system. The licensing process took a little over 2 months and I got blessed on April 5, 2007 with 2 biracial boys (ages 1 & 2 at the time) and we will be finalizing next week on Nov. 16, 2007. But I did wait almost 20 years to even be old enough, and financially/emotionally/mentally stable enough to adopt. In all that time I did a lot of volunteering with foster care/orphan related causes and I learned all I could about parenting, the adoption community, and the different types of adoption. That helped to get me through... I plan to adopt at least 2 more kids....one more from foster care and another from Haiti (as Haiti is very dear to my heart) (But hopefully more!!!) Just wanted to welcome you and encourage you on your adoption journey!

I am single and I adopted from foster/adoption :-) My process took four months (classes-placement) and they are beating down my door to give me another little one. I will probably open the door next year. Just be strong....I think agencies and people want to see a powerful, strong person, don't let them discourage you! I'm turning 40 soon. Single parenting is tough, but wonderful!

Thanks, makarios79, for the reply and encouragement. I looked into our foster care system and was told that at my age and as a single mom, I wouldn't get any children under teenage, and I don't feel like that is where I can help the most -- some people are wonderful in that arena, but I don't think that's me -- not starting there! I was told that there were far more "worthy" homes for the infants and toddlers!

I too started the process last year as a 59 year old single dad 'want to be' and expected every step of the way that some red flag would pop up and it would be 'over'. But I kept pressing on and now I'm the dad to four great teenage boys who light up my life every day. I spent too many years 'married' to a thankless career and woke up and realized if I was ever going to have a family, I needed to move quickly. But I would not allow my self to believe that it could happen to me, male, at my age, etc. However, when the right opportunity opened up things fell in line and voila.. my family became real and I have the daily joys and challanges of a single parent! I love to see the progress in my boys as their self esteem grows from having the support of a committed parent. And as my teenagers 'crash' through the house, I stay mellow and remind myself that they are just spending their inheritance now as I fix a chair here, a broken window there, etc. Teenagers are great, I have some wonderful talks with them and boys will be boys (No soccer in the living room!) but what a great trip, sorry that I waited so long. Go for it and keep your spirits up, when it happens for you it will be awesome. Pete, pop to four great kids.

I am a single foster/adoptive mom & it can be done. I was asked to think about fostering teenagers (there weren't that many babies-so I was told ) & I knew I wanted a baby. After the placement of my son at 3 months old I was called every day to take more babies. I think the agencies have so many teenagers they try to get them placed. If you want to be a parent to an infant don't let anything stop you - you have to work twice as hard as a single parent so going thru the classes / licensing is the first of it. It can be done, it has been done, & there is no reason you can't be a mom too. Good luck & hang in there - if you decide to foster/adopt it is a difficult road but if you want it badly enough it can be acheived.

What helped me get through the wait (which is never easy) was to pick a program that I knew the timeline and knew that I would have a child at the end. For me that meant international adoption. I knew at the end I would have my daughter and nobody would be changing their mind. My process took 11 months (could have been 4 months shorter if I didn't have to fight with the state of Indiana just to get my own birth certificate) and I got to request gender and age of my child. Good luck with this process. Adoption is not easy on the emotions but so worth it in the end. Samantha

Well I agree everyone has to do the type of adoption that is best for them. I don't know how it is where you live, but there are TONS of babies/toddlers here where I live that are placed in foster case and eventually adopted. I know of several "older" people who have adopted infants & toddlers. I personally get calls for babies ALL THE TIME! I can't even tell you the amount of infant placements I have turned down. WOW! Someone actually said that to you...

Hi, To make the wait easier, I got busy, found something to occupy myself with (music lessons and preparing for future recitals). It made the time seem to pass faster but it wasn't so involved that I couldn't stop right away--because, in my case, the baby was already born when I got the call from my agency and placed in my home alittle over a week from the day I got the call. I hope this helps. Don't give up hope and good luck.