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Do you do Santa with your kids, or do you think it is lying to their kids? I read a good debate about all of this the other day. What are your thoughts?
I agree with Michelle. I have heard the argument that if kids realized you "lied" about Santa, then they may think you "lied" about God, so it is a bad thing. But then I look at my family, friends, co-workers, and we all grew up believing in Santa, and it did not affect our belief in God.
The magic of Christmas is a wonderful thing, and I would never take that away from my kids.
Kay
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I have to say, I told my oldest when he was little, but not because I felt like he wouldn't believe in God or we were lying. I told the little fellow because he was terrified of Santa and would not sleep. He was afraid he would come into his house that night and I couldn't get him to sleep any other way. However, now that he is 6, he is at least pretending to believe. All of his friends believe and he wants to, too.
I have no clue if my 3 year old does. All I know is he ran up to him in the mall and said, "you're not real." ;) He says he does want Santa to come to the house. We do buy Santa gifts, too. So, I don't make a huge deal out of it, but I try not to ruin it, either.
We are a "Santa" family. There is such a small window of time where kids believe, that I don't really think it hurts anything (at least not in my family - every family is different). I was 5 when my friend told me there was no Santa - I hope my kids (who are 4 and 6) at least have another year or two of believing, but if they do ask, I will tell them the truth.
While they are young, I use Santa to my advantage. Each year I send my boys a letter from Santa, and in it, he stresses the importance of good behavior, expresses that the reason for the season is Jesus' birth (our religious beliefs), and the importance of doing good deeds and giving to those less fortunate. (It's not has "heavy" as it sounds - haha).
The biggest obstacle I found is explaining why they receive gifts when there are children who don't (such as those on our churches "giving tree").
bajj
Do you do Santa with your kids, or do you think it is lying to their kids? I read a good debate about all of this the other day. What are your thoughts?
We don't encourage the belief in Santa, but we encourage the exercise of imagination that happens because he's a part of the celebration of Christmas. We went and met Santa this year because Bug was looking for him. Before that, it would have been our decision to encourage it and we didn't want to do that. But we do encourage her imagination and my goodness, is hers working overtime this year. For us, it's also encouraging to know that in the end, after we've talked about Santa etc., the book she wants to read when it's time for a story is all about the FIRST Christmas. She knows the reason why WE celebrate, and is learning the carols, Scriptures, Christian symbols of the Advent/Christmas season and that is what ultimately matters.
I won't even go into the whole discussion on whether or not it is lying. It's not that black and white. We live in a society where the majority of people encourage their kids to believe in Santa, and do it in very elaborate ways. I think it would be a greater, more unloving thing to take that away from them (because my very articulate daughter would tell all her preschool friends the "truth"). That is not my decision. My choice is to encourage the true meaning of Christmas and let the rest just be a part of the fun and imagination side of things.
We are a "Santa family" as well. I loved believing in Santa as a child and want my girls to experience that fantasy and magic. As someone said earlier, there's such a small window of time for believing, and I don't want to take it away any sooner than I have to.
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We are a "Santa family" as well. I honestly don't think it's going to hinder their faith when they realize that the jolly man giving gifts is none other than daddy, with mommy's help ofcourse!
That being said, my daughter knows that the birth of Jesus Christ is WHY we celebrate Christmas. My son is only 3 but, he too, will understand this as he gets older.
I agree with the sentiment that they are only little for such a short time. In my mind, there is no harm in childhood fantasy.
We were at Wal-Mart last weekend to see Santa. The kids were waiting to get their pictures made with him. My dd asked me if I thought he was the real Santa or a fake one. I replied...well, what do you think? She said, oh he's fake. I want to go to the North Pole to see the real one, but I'd have to wear like 3 coats, it's so cold up there! I just laughed and said, yeah, you're right he's a fake one, but don't say that too loud, you wouldn't want the little kids to know!
We're a split family. :evilgrin:
I believed in Santa as a kid and loved that fantasy while it lasted. Of course it was kind of a bummer to have to figure it out and face facts that no, the Easter Bunny wasn't real, neither was the Tooth Fairy, etc., but...it wasn't a BIG Deal to me.
Dh, on the other hand, felt horribly betrayed and lied to. So it was a BIG DEAL to him that his parents said there was a Santa, when there really wasn't. He still gets exercised about it when we discuss the Santa/No Santa issue. :D
We talked to our kids about the historical man known as St. Nicholas. We tell the kids that there was this guy called St. Nicholas who did nice stuff for people. We talk about how this became woven into our culture and how the whole Santa idea came out of that. So, yes, there was a St. Nick, but no, there is no one still alive like that now, and when he was alive he wasn't like the big jolly fellow in the movies.
We do enjoy the fantasy about Santa, just like we do enjoy fairy tales and stories. The kids like Miracle on 34th Street just like I do. (The old one, with Natalie Wood. :D ) The enjoyed 'The Santa Claus' with Tim Allen. It's still a fantasy, much like the concept of 'The Borrowers'. I mean, who doesn't want to have fairies living in the garden, or Borrowers under the floorboards? Santa at the North Pole, with Rudolph and the little toy making elves....
We are a Santa family. Last year was our first Christmas with our older daughter and she wasn't much of a believer at 10. But my oldest son is a big time believer. When he was 4 he and I flew to North Pole (North Pole, Alaska) with my sister in law and niece. She worked for alaska airlines so we could fly free. We went to Sant's "house" ( a store, what a gimmick) and saw him, then after dinner Santa came to the hotel. There were a whole lot of kids there. We sat in a lodge type room with a giant fireplace, and Santa read Polar Express to the kids. He is almost 12 now, and still believes. DD is starting to question it, and I just ask her what she thinks. Soon enough they will figure it all out.
There is no such person as Santa I suppose, but there is a spirit of Santa.
Not only do we do santa with our kids, Santa LIVES with us! Castle will tell you that her daddy is hoho! I'll attach a picture of Castle and her "hoho" made a couple of weekends ago.
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We do the Santa thing, but when they ask....I tell them the truth and try to explain what I feel Santa represents. The spirit of giving etc. My dd is almost 10 and this year she asked me if he was real. I said the spirit of Santa is real and she did figure it out. Very upset to know that he's not real and moped around for a couple of days. Now though she's back into the excitement of things and understands that the focus isn't on a fat jolly man flying reindeer at night but the joy of giving and all the other things that help represent the true meaning of Christmas.
We have some work to do in this area though. While we've taught the kids about Jesus and what Christmas really celebrates, we haven't quite gotten the message across to our youngest. When my dd was talking about doing the bday cake for Jesus, my youngest said "I thought Christmas was about presents for ME!":o
Awww, crick, that's unfortunately typical of little ones. I have been trying to teach mine it's better to give than to receive. We have been going to nursing homes and singing, taking homemade objects, etc. They do enjoy it, but oh they want their gifts, too!
We'll be doing the Santa thing too. I don't think it takes anything away. I think it adds to it, as long as you do it right. Growing up my parents made a big deal about Santa, but they also made a big deal about Christ and what Christmas really means. I intend to do the same with my dd.
We also live with Santa. In fact, DH is playing Santa tonight for a local elementary school. We're bringing Eve in early so we can get pictures before the madness begins.
crick
We have some work to do in this area though. While we've taught the kids about Jesus and what Christmas really celebrates, we haven't quite gotten the message across to our youngest. When my dd was talking about doing the bday cake for Jesus, my youngest said "I thought Christmas was about presents for ME!":o
This is so tough at any age, isn't it? Our church is having some fun with this this year. Or should I say "I'm having fun" emphasizing the "waiting" of Advent. We do a kids' sermon type thing in the morning worship and the first Sunday of Advent I intro'd a gift bag (and it is huge!!!) and all the kids were oohing and ahhhing and I really worked it up to get them thinking about whether or not it is for them... and then I told them they had to wait because that was what this time is about, waiting expectantly for the Christ Child to come. I don't know how this will end, but I'm thinking it will end not with a gift for them, but for someone like them... I'm thinking of donating money on behalf of our kids' ministry to buy an animal for a family in Africa... it's all to make a point I guess, but it sure has got them thinking and talking about waiting and getting presents and the possibility that it won't be for them! And interesting to hear the kids talking among themselves about it all. Anyway... thought I'd share that...
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We also do Santa, but the emphasis is definitely on Jesus and why we celebrate. DS is in preschool this year and while it's at a Christian church, they leave the children to their own family beliefs. He is learning about all holiday celebrations.
Much to my pleasant surprise, this week they did a page with a candy cane on it and glued pipe cleaners to make it striped. When the "hooked end" is up it said "Candy Cane", and when it looked like a j "J is for Jesus". The kids chose which way to hang it, he hung it as a J.
He won't visit Santa, and that's fine. We neither force Santa nor condemn him. However, our niece is not being "exposed" to Santa. she's 2 1/2 so we'll see what happens, if she "tells". My biggest hope is that when he learns (and DH when she's older) the truth, he learns it from us, gently!