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I have two wonderful daughters from Bulgaria, almost 7 and 5. I really have the bug to add one more, preferrably a girl age 4. While I can feel the desire to bring home one more daughter, the practical side of me flares up. How do I handle 3 violin lessons, 3 piano lessons, homework for 3, 3 kids staying home sick all at different times, etc, etc.
Anyone here with 3 children? Is it much harder than 2? Going from one to two actually was easier for me, as my eldest, clingy daughter now has a playmate and I get free time I never knew when it was just her and I. But, I am fearful that adding #3 will add a lot more work.
Any insight is appreciated!
I have just been placed with a sibling set of 3 kids that I've had at home for 2 months now. I'm not much help in knowing how much more work it will be than having 2 since I went from 0 to 3 but I do know that it is doable. I try really hard to find one on one time with the kids even if it is someone helping me cook dinner while the other two play. Although we do homework at the same time, I will spend time helping each child. Mostly I think it is a matter of finding a routine/schedule that works for everyone. There are days when one kid will need more attention but then I try to balance that out the other days. As for other activities, I just try to get them in all at the same time for example all in the same swim class times etc. Since my kids are 8,6,and 5 this seems to work preaty well.
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I am a single parent of 3 ages 3 and under. They have been with me since April 07.
My oldest is 3.
My middle son is 1 will be 2 in March 08
My youngest son is one as well.
All my boys came to live with me on the same day so I went from 0-3 literally in one day.
I have to say that it is very managable if you have a good support system and a set routine/schedule that you follow everyday.
My support system is ok. I REALLY could use more help though.
It is VERY hard to get somebody to babysit 3 kids without having to pay exhorbitant amounts of money, which I do not have. I really think it stems from the fact that my kids are so young and not all that well behaved.
I thought that I would have more support from people I have helped in the past, but I do not and I pretty much do everything alone. It has amounted to a lot of missed days from work for appointments, sickness etc....but I am BLESSED to have a very flexible job where lots of absences aren't counted against me as long as whatever I am assigned that week to do is accomplished.
I have to say that (AT LEAST FOR ME) when I only have 2 of my kids, there is a noticable difference. My middle son spent the weekend with my mom because it was his turn and the house was a lot less chaotic. I notice this everytime one of my kids is not at home, things just seem to go smoother around the house.
Your kids are older than mine and your older kids are able to do more for themselves and even "help out" with a new child. I pretty much have to do EVERYTHING for my kids and most days I am absolutely drained by the end of the day.
Having said all that, I wouldn't trade my kids or my life for anything in the world. It is more work, but it is SOOOOOOO worth it.
Thank you for all the replies. I am torn, but decided to pray on it. If I was somehow a stay at home mom (lottery here I come!) then I would definitely do it. But, having to work and have 3 seems like so much. Maybe becasue I just dealt with 2 sick kids (of course at different times!) for the last month that adding one more kid to get sick once the other 2 are healthy just seems to put me over the edge!
I have two wonderful daughters from Bulgaria, almost 7 and 5. I really have the bug to add one more, preferrably a girl age 4. While I can feel the desire to bring home one more daughter, the practical side of me flares up. How do I handle 3 violin lessons, 3 piano lessons, homework for 3, 3 kids staying home sick all at different times, etc, etc.
Anyone here with 3 children? Is it much harder than 2? Going from one to two actually was easier for me, as my eldest, clingy daughter now has a playmate and I get free time I never knew when it was just her and I. But, I am fearful that adding #3 will add a lot more work.
Any insight is appreciated!
I am a single mom of 2 Guatemalan boys (3 and 1) and I really want a girl. My fear is finding a country to adopt from. It seems that single's have fewer adn fewer options everyday.
Y
Bulgaria is very open to singles, and the country is moving now. It had "slowed" under the old Minister of Justice. He was fired for deriliction of duty and replaced with a women who lived in the orphanages for several years. She is now moving full speed at getting the kids placed in homes. If you want a link to some information about Bulgaria let me know and I will PM you. The kids are beautiful and healthy.
Kay
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I am waiting to venture into the world of 3 kids. I'm waiting for a referral that should be coming any day for my little so I can have 3 kids under 3. So I can't offer you personal advice on how to handle it, but I can relay the stories from my sister who became a widow while pregnant with number 3.
She says what helps her are the kids being in the same sports, the same musical lessons, and she just sits in for the long haul. Her boys are 9 and soon-to-be 7 1/2 and her daughter is 28-months-old.
Homework is done all together in the kitchen. The boys read to each other and to her while she makes dinner. The oldest helps the youngest with his spelling words under mom's supervision.
The kids go to bed at staggered times based on age so that all of the kids get mommy and me time before going to sleep.
She does have a back up babyistter that runs a daycare out of her home, who is a little looser than the school about allowing sick kids to come. So push comes to shove, my sister works a half-day, leaves her sick child with the sitter, then picks up the sick child post lunch. She hasn't had too many incidents of having the kids all sick at once.
I hope that helps.
What country are you adopting from? Whrere are your other two kids from. My boys are 23 months apart (3 and 1). I adopted them from Guatemala, which is a mess now. I am thinking of starting again next year, so I am keeping track of places that accept singles.
Y
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Sorry, I have not checked this thread in a while. Both my girls are from Bulgaria. They accept singles. The children are beautiful and it is an easy adoption process, at least compared to Russia and Kazakhstan.
Kay