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In my looking at potential adoptive parents, I have yet to see a pagan anywhere. By any chance is there any resources that could help me in my search?
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sorry brandy! thank the gods i came back to this thread to get the URL, else i never would have known I'd inadvertently violated the guidelines. no harm intended.
Anyone reading this thread: I am aware of a pagan ministry which, while not an agency and therefore cannot handle the legal aspects of an adoption, DOES match Pagan natural mothers with Pagan adoptive parents! PLEASE PM me or email me at thecoppo@yahoo.com if you would like their contact info! Scorpionflower, AKMommy, I am PMing you with said info!
Blessed Be!
1st- COOL on your youngest child's name- We named our girl Marina Sage. And who also was born in Feb but 2008. 2nd- We tried the discrimination angle but nothing happened. "Agencies have the right to choose their PAPs. Because most generally, PAP approach the agency not vice versa" ---Garbage! we feel but....
most states' adoption laws reflect a preference to place the reliquished child with PAPs whose religious beliefs match the natural mothers, or at least provide for the natural mother's right to seek such a preference....it's not discriminatory per se, and these statutes generally have an "if possible" clause, recognizing that the religious question shouldn't make it impossible to place the child....of course, social workers are humans, with preconceptions and prejudices as all humans do, and they are charged with determining the best interest of the children in their care, which duty the majority take with appropriate seriousness (though there are unethical workers throughout this industry, even in licensed and accredited agencies, more concerned with "making a sale" than with doing what's best for each individual potential triad) so it is wise to be discreet when discussing religion with these agencies and their representatives. words like pagan, witchcraft, wicca, will inevitably conjure up all the negative images we've fought for so long to combat for many of these social workers, unless you're dealing with an individual who personally knows someone of our faith. get a sense of the person you're dealing with before you delve into your own religious background if you're looking to be an adoptive parent; asking questions about the religious backgrounds of the birthparents of the children that have been relinquished for adoption may give you some insight into the social worker's level of tolerance for beliefs outside the mainstream. if and when you are called upon to describe your religious affiliation, it may be wise to avoid the hot-button words in favour of a more descriptive approach, framing it in relation to native american practices, shamanism, and the like. avoid references to magick and spellwork, or anything with occult undertones.remember, however much it may seem discriminatory, this is not the ideal time nor place to make a stand for religious rights. your goal is to pass an agency homestudy in order to provide a home and a loving family for a child in their charge. a natural mother who is conseidering relinquishing her child for adoption is in a much more secure position at this stage, so long as she makes herself VERY aware of her rights. make VERY certain of what your state's laws are regarding consent to adoption, the revocation of consent period, and statutes of limitations to challenging the adoption in court. remember, YOU are this child's ONLY mother right up until that final decree of adoption is issued by the court, and you will STILL be this child's mother after this child has acquired TWO sets of parents. just because the legal relationship is terminated, does not mean that biological and spiritual bond between mother and child has been severed. whether you have a personal relationship with this child or not from this day forward, you will always be connected. you have the right to choose to raise this child yourself at any time up to the expiration of the revocation period, and you have the right only to work with an agency that will respect your religion and your wishes as to the religion of the PAPs. you have the right to insist on an open adoption, with as much or as little contact as you wish--and you should always err on the side of asking for more contact than less; if you change your mind about how much contact you want post-decree, it will be many times easier to have less contact than more.
I am a pagan who is looking to possibly adopt and have created a yahoo group for all people involved in any area of adoption. If anyone would like the info please let me know. We did know of a pagan couple who were going to give up their twin boys to us but changed their minds at the last minute. We had been planning to do a private adoption.
Blessings,
Starr
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I wonder if at this point some of this might merely need to be a word of mouth thing. I have friends who are looking to adopt right now and are having issues because all of the agencies that seem credible are the ones who are strictly christian and who require the adoptive parents who sign with them to be christian. They just can't handle being decietful with their agency, so they're quickly running out of options.
There used to be a website, where they kept a list of prospective pagan parents and expectant mothers and would get them together. I can't find it anymore. It may have morphed into the information page mentioned above. I have heard all sorts of discrimination soried regarding adoption. Too old, too fat, wrong religion...
Hi everyone,
My husband and I are in a similar boat. I'm pagan and we're looking to adopt. It would be nice if there was a pagan adoption agency out there.
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I'm so happy to see this post! If anyone comes up with a group or maybe just a chat please keep me in the loop. We're hoping to do an older child adoption & when asked about religion we just had to say "not currently practicing." It felt really weird but I didn't want to face discrimination. I had already had enough of that when I adopted as a single parent!
:hissy: We've been trying, but have been denied because of our faith... If you still need a family, we're here!!
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Yes...I was just wondering the same thing. I'm just getting started looking to adopt, and already I'm being told by some folks to just throw in the towel and give up now, because no way I'll find an agency that'll work with me. Why? I'm a Christo-Pagan, specifically I'm a Welsh Faerie Faith-Vodun-Mormon blend. In theory, being a Mormon I should have no trouble with LDS adoptions right? wrong! Because of my job as a professional Hoodoo Rootworker (aka witch doctor aka a professional witch) I'm out of the loop, and besides it's not "Salt Lake City, Utah" Mormonism, but a Pagan type of Mormonism, and therefor "not Mormon enough" for their tastes. Any place I go, any agency, even if they don't ask my religion, they are going to ask my job. And it's: "Hoodoo Rootworker? What is it you do exactly?" I do psychic readings, card readings, faerie channleing, voodoo dolls, rootwork, spell castings, prayer requests, candle vigels, other Hoodoo Conjur Arts, as well as Enochian and Alchemical magic.Than they go: "Oh you're a pagan witch! No, I wasn't asking about your religion, I was asking about your career." That IS my career. That IS what I do for money. That IS my job. If you had asked about my religion I would have told you that I am a legally ordained minister, and am a High Priestess and the head and founder of a coven, I didn't just start a new church, I founded a whole new religious denomination. It is a blending of American Mormonism and Welsh & Scottish Faerie Faith. I am termed by other witches as a "walker between the worlds" one who communicates with the Faeries and the spirits on behalf of the living, I am by religion a Hedge Witch, for I walk with one foot on either side of the hedge between our world and the Realm of the Fae. Which lead one woman to say to me: "What are YOU going to do with a baby? You are into Satan worship and baby sacrifices are you?"*sigh*You'd be surprised how many people think the only reason a pagan would want to adopt a baby is so that they can sacrifice it to Satan! The thing is Paganism is not than just a religion for me. It's a lifestyle. I am by race a "Gypsy" and magic arts and witchcraft have been passed down through my family for centuries. And THAT is were I'm REALLY running into adoption naysayers. "What makes you think a birth mother would want a caravan dwelling gypsy fortune teller, and a black magic witch besides, to adopt her baby!" So I've got lots against me here:#1 pagan by religion and the high priestess of a coven#2 pagan by career - come sit at my table, have a cup of tea, let me read your cards, can't see me in person, no problem, here's my psychic hotline call me anytime, need supplies here's my Etsy shop, if I don't have it let me know and I'll find it for you. No, I'm sorry, I don't have a "regular" job, because this IS my full time job#3 pagan by culture, I am a Scottish Traveller, I was born and raised in a car, traveled my whole childhood in a group of about 200 cars, truck, trailers, motorhomes, and my grandmother was a professional witch from Scotland and picked me to take over the trade for her#4 I live in a pink motorhome which clearly advertises the fact that I am a Gypsy and a Hoodoo fortune teller painted right on the side of it - there is no denying my Paganism once you meet me face to face at my home (on wheels), seeing how my "house" doubles as a moving billboard advertising what I do for a living.#5 I'm not some sweet fluffy bunny Wicca, I deal in hard core black magic - voodoo dolls, jujus, wanga, hexes, grigris, veve, faerie faith, and familiar spirits; I didn't learn this stuff from the likes of Silver Ravenwolf, I'm a Scottish Highland Witch Doctor of Pict decent who learned it from my grandmother, who learned it from her grandmother, and so on, a fact that we can trace through a 400 year written record in an ancient 50lb iron clad, leather bound family Grimiore, passed down since the 1400sSo, I'm being branded even harder to "match" than the standard "white witch wiccan type" Pagan, because well, ask any one in town about "The Sea Witch of Old Orchard Beach", you'll get some doozies of a story about me, I don't know where half the rumors came from, but fact remain the locals are terrified out of their minds and make me out to be like the wicked witch out of a fairy tale. People are scared of me. I'm harmless, but try telling them that.It's bad enough being pagan to begin with, but than to be one of a small minority of paganism that even other pagans run away from? All pagans get branded Satanic, but those of us on the "dark side" of Paganism, get branded outright demonic!Yes. I am finding the adoptive agency prejudices against pagans steep.
I am currently looking for a pagan adoptive family or single parent for twin boys I will be giving birth to June 5th. I am currently residing in Ohio and am looking for an open adoption, which doesn't need to be in the same state. I started this process late and would prefer to do this independently rather than through an adoption agency. I've been in contact with many agencies and it just doesn't feel quite right. I will be bringing the boys home with me until I can find a family that connects. If anyone has discovered anything further since these posts, I'd be so very grateful if you'd please email me at mystiquecraven@gmail.com Blessed Be)O(