I am so hurt, I dont know what to do

Well just a little background, At 19 I gave up twin girls for adoption, private sealed adoption, no contact.the bio dad did not want to be tied down with children at such a young age and I could not do it alone ( or at least thats what I was convinced of by his Mom ) I realize I had the fianll say but I did what I thought was going to be best I allowed everyone around me to tell me what to do. I never forgave myself for not having more backbone. To continue on, I located my adopted girls 19 years later (I searched for them not the other way around ) They were adults and had grown up in a good home with decent parents they were okay with us communicating, until the AM found out. then she told me basically to get lost and leave her daughters alone. So the girls and I continued to stay in touch a little never talking on the phone or any face to face meetings, although I did offer to drive to thier town which is about 6 hours from here, they said no they were not ready, Now its three years later and we still have the long distance e-mail going on. One of the girls now has 2 youg daughters and is getting divorced, she e-mailed to let me know about the divorce, when I replied that it would be hard for the kids she came unglued and demanded to know how I knew, well I couldnt very well tell her it was her sis who told me so I told her it was from the public records you know.She asked me for information about the Bio dad and iI helped her to find him, About a month later she contacted me and told me via e-mail that bio dad had come to visit and then she sent pics of him and his family with the girls and the babies. I am so hurt that after 3 years with me trying to develop a relationship with them that they just let him come rushing to them. I feel as though I should have just I dont know I only know it hurts so bad that my heart hurts.