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Hello everyone,
I am 42 and blessed to be a new mother of a 3 month old. I always considered myself "young" looking but if one more person asks me is that "your grandbaby" I just may crock. Can anyone relate?
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I couldn't agree more, I feel very blessed with the children I have, both younger and older. I have 6 grown children, 31 to 23, and 4 younger children, 9 to 15 months(just waiting for a court date for finalization). We also have a 5 month old fd, which may go to adoption, and my soon to be adopted son has a sibling due soon which we will take placement of, if they come into care. I am 51 and my husband is 50 and we are very happy with our lives and have gotten used to being called grandma and grandpa. There are some people in my life who think we are nuts and continue to remind us that we are not getting any younger, but I have learned how to not let them offend me or take away my joy.
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I am 46, and we are adopting our 16th child this monday (12th adopted).
He is only ONE year old. He joins children that are 3, 6, 8, 14 at home. I get asked that question alot. I simply say "NOPE". I do not feel that I need to explain anything to anyone :)
Self-assured and comfortable in the role I have chosen, I owe no one an explaination and no one can make me "feel" any certain way by asking me the question!
But, I used to have the opposite problem since I adopted 10,11,12 and 14 yr olds at the age of 23. I was asked, are these your siblings?
LOL kinda liked it better that way though LOL :love:
I'm an older amom. Okay so I'm much older. I'm for ever being mistaken for my kids grandma, but this is my favorite:
My 10 year old son's scout master and member of our church said to me and I quote: "Um I know your kids are adopted but what do I call you? Mom? Grandma? What?"
My response was, "You may call me Mrs. *******".
And he does.
Saj, that's just pathetically funny! :evilgrin: We've not been mistaken for the grandpa and grandma...yet. :D Dd(17), though, is really miffed when people ask her if her sibs are her kids. I think it's funny, but she fails (totally) to see the humor in it. Her sibs are 11, 8, 5 and 4. :evilgrin:
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SAJ, you'll appreciate a little note about our family. I have two biological daughters who both have biracial children. My DH is black, I am CC. He and I have 4 adopted black and biracial children who compare in ages to our grandchildren. When we're all out together, I really wonder who they think the mom is, who the "husband" is, who I am. I'm pretty certain they assume I'm grandma, but because my DH is black, they likely think he's the daddy/husband. We're so passed caring - I just find our family very "interesting" and would likely consider us boring in any other combination.
I am new to this particular forum but glad to have found it. I am 41 and DH is 44. We have bio children ages 20, 17 and 15. We are fostering (hopefully adopting- TPR in progress) a 2 year old FS. While we havent been called grandma or grandpa yet our children are often asked if FS is "theirs". they are horrified by the question. Our 17 BD refuses to carry him in public places with other teenagers present because she doesnt want anyone to think she is the mom.
Also, last year we had a placement of 4 siblings under the age of 6. Went to visit MIL in hospital and left BS and BD in lobby with little ones for a few minutes with the little ones and when we came back BD was crying because she said an "old" lady called her a sl-t and told her she should be ashamed of herself for having so many children at her age. Amazing that anyone would say that---even if they WERE hers. Oh well. We love our family just the way it is. Like my hubby says starting all over will either keep us young or age us very very quickly :)
Well I'm much older than the orginal poster - I'm a 50 yo single amom of a 3 yo daughter born in guatemala. So I get asked that question a lot - but usually by people my age who have grandchildren the same age as my daughter, so they're only trying to be friendly. So I just say, no she's my daughter and give a big smile. (I guess it helps that during the adoption wait I had plenty of time to realize that people were going to think I was the grandmom. Partly because I have a sister 16 years younger than me, so lots of people thought my mom was her grandmom and sometimes that I was the mom. So, I've had lots of practice.)
Joskids,
I just now got back to this thread. What a marvelously interesting family you have. Sounds like so much fun.
One thing we have noticed since becoming a transracial family is that there are lots of other families out there similar to ours. Especially when going to places like Disney and other family oriented vacationing places.
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I left our 13 yr old FD in a lobby area with her two FBrothers, ages 2 1/2 and 4 at the time, for a minute while I walked the other kids to their gymnastics class.A couple of teenage boys approached her and asked if the boys were hers. Luckily she thought it was funny and a compliment that she must look older.I'm not old enough yet to be mistaken for the grandma, but I have been asked if I'm running a day care.Jess
I don't get that, I guess because we don't have any kiddos yet and are still in our 30's.
However this reminded me of when I was younger. I was 11 or 12 when my brother was born, so he was a few years old when I started dating. My then boyfriend, now my DH, and I used to take him places. I can't even describe the looks we would get from people assuming we, a couple of teens, were his parents! Even some comments. I guess things might have changed some since then, but I feel bad for younger parents, or even those that just LOOK younger! I had a hard time being nice then, but had to because if I wasn't my bro would totally have tattled on me if I said the things I thought, lol.
We are in our forties and it is mostly kids that think we are grandparents... my only concern is that I become less able to lift babies as I get older. I have torn my shoulder joints to the point of needing surgery and I just pray that the Lord will continue to enable me to adopt the little sweethearts because I truly believe that I am supposed to tend to the fatherless in this way.
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Momma24RN - We have just started the dia journey (me 42, husband 43) and have a BD who is 18 and senior in high school. She has so many students in her school that are eparents or already parents that I worried she would be offended by comments once we are blessed with a child. She very firmly told me that she would look at those people who make the comments and tell them no, she is very proud to be the big sister. I personally can't wait to hear those comments - I'll welcome them because they will so be worth it:)
timleenettesue
I am 41 and my husband is 43. When we were first placed with our little man (I was 38) someone did ask me that. I was very upset.:hissy: But before I turned 40 I became a grandma to the best grandson in the world (imo). And now I have a daughter that is younger than my grandson. We really confuse people when we all go somewhere together. Our oldest is 20 and our youngest is almost 11 months. :grouphug: