Does this mean he's gay????

Kat - I'm definitely not saying that his babysitter made him gay at all! I was just saying the whole "God made me this way" comment could have come from that...especially since they never went to church and were not very religious.

LOL-this is just little boy stuff. He likely hears his sister say certain boys are hot and just copies it. They don't get to "gross" until around 4th grade.

Thanks for your responses! I worry also because he was abused by his mom & I hope that isn't playing into this. He is in therapy & I guess I can bring it up with the therapist...but I didn't want to overreact if it was just little boy stuff. I actually just talked to my husband because I was concerned that he would have a problem with it. Basically, because he is having difficulty bonding with him due to behavior issues as is. My husband assured me that he isn't concerned and we will cross that bridge when we get to it...if we get to it. That makes me feel better.

Thanks for your responses! I worry also because he was abused by his mom & I hope that isn't playing into this. He is in therapy & I guess I can bring it up with the therapist...but I didn't want to overreact if it was just little boy stuff. I actually just talked to my husband because I was concerned that he would have a problem with it. Basically, because he is having difficulty bonding with him due to behavior issues as is. My husband assured me that he isn't concerned and we will cross that bridge when we get to it...if we get to it. That makes me feel better.

I agree - at this point (any point actually) just love him and let him feel free to be whoever he is.

Just little boys stuff. Believe me, he probably has no idea what it really means. He might have heard an older kid use that expression and decided he would too. EZ

I MUST AGREE....I must ask only one thing...What is the issue...Do you not LOVE him regardless of which sexual behavior he was blessed with?????????? I always told my son(29 yrs.old) I do not care whom he decides he wants to become or whom he becomes it with....AS long as he is happy! A mother can always look into their childs eyes(biological or otherwise) and tell if their child is happy. Sexual behavior, color, and material , made no difference to me...I only want to see in his eyes he is happy. I wish you much luck...just love him...no matter what...isn't that what WE all want?:love:

I doubt he has any notion of the implications you're projecting on what he's said. It seems more likely he's just mimicking some stuff he's heard. On the other hand, if he really did understand what he was saying when he said "God made me this way," then I'd have to say he's got a pretty good point. I don't think it means anything, but it's a good time for you to consider this: Would it matter if he is gay? You've been given an opportunity to consider how you'd handle this news if it's ever delivered in earnest.

Cetalley - I guess I was just wondering if this is little boy stuff or not. There isn't really an issue...except that I was worried that it could have a negative effect on my husband & his relationship since the bonding/attachment is a challenge for my husband already. After talking to my husband about it, I do feel better knowing that it wouldn't.

I am gay, so maybe I can lend a little perspective for you, Crissy.First of all, boys who have "feminine" qualities aren't necessarily gay. It probably means nothing, actually---kids don't yet know all the social rules about gender roles, so they just play with whatever seems interesting, no matter if it's "feminine" or "masculine." When my son was two, he used to tromp around in my high heels. It didn't mean anything about his gender--he was just playing at being a grownup.But even if your son was doing a lot of pretending to be a girl, and so on, it doesn't mean he's gay. Most gay people are very clear about whether they are male or female. (I'm about the girliest girl around!). That's because gender identity and sexual orientation are different things: the majority of gay people are very clear about their genders, they just like to date people who are the same gender. People with gender identity issues, on the other hand, can be gay or straight, but they feel like their physical body and their 'real' gender don't match. So it's two separate things. Gender dysphoria, where somebody is one sex but feels like they are really the other, is very rare. Unless you have a lot of reasons to think your son has this problem, I wouldn't worry too much about it.There is one thing you should think very hard about, though. Are you ready to love this kid for who he is, however he turns out? If you can't love him whether he's gay, straight, smart, dumb, sane, crazy, green, purple or polka-dotted, you should really re-think your adoption. You can't just "bond" to him if he's your dream child, and reject him if he isn't. No kid turns out exactly as we plan---you gotta love them anyway.

Boulderbabe, there is NO WAY he will be my "dream child" and I'm okay with that. As I stated, this is a new situation & we are still trying to figure out whether or not we are the right family for this little boy. I will be totally honest with myself when it comes time to make that decision. I think the question should be "will I care about & parent this child to the best of my ability no matter how he turns out." The answer to that is "absolutely." I don't know if I will "love" him someday...I certainly hope so!! My very best friend is gay & I love her & her girlfriend to death! However, I have also seen the negative affect this has had in many aspects of her life. Most of all, people turning their backs on her & treating her differently - including many in her immediate family (She was married to a man previously). My concern would simply be that I want the best for my children. Being gay still is not accepted by many & it makes life that much harder. I wouldn't want to see my child go through the hurt. Although, of course, I would want my child to be happy & be honest with themselves, no matter what that means.

Meh, I think straight people overestimate how hard it is to be gay. It used to be terrible. Today, it's not such a big deal. As an adult, you gravitate to social circles where people really don't care much about it. At my job or among my friends, it's about as meaningful as being left-handed or brunette. People know, but it's not really very significant.The biggest hurts to gay people often come from their families, and particularly their parents. So being the kind of mom who will love her son for just who he is will help your son, no matter how he turns out! Sounds like you're on the right path. Good luck!

Thanks Boulderbabe!

I concur...at 7 years old...he probably just doesn't know what "hot" means... Even if he does...I can remember when I was a little girl, that I used to tell my mom all the time that I LOVED Olivia Newton-John (yeah, dating myself here haha), and that I had every intention of marrying her. When my mom told me that I could not marry her because I was a woman, I told her that I would become a man and marry her. Well, I am STRAIGHT as an arrow, and have been married to my husband for a month shy of 14 years, and have been completely happy. I think little kids get the ideas of "love" and "LOVE" mixed up. I know that's what it was for me. They don't understand the concept of love being anything other than that fluttery feeling in their little hearts when they see their friends at school or getting a new cat or dog...and so they use the vocabulary of the time to express this love.

He is too younger so i don't think if he is gay. I think he doesn't understand the meaning of "HOT". [URL="http://advice4parenting.com/"] Parenting Tips[/URL]