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I'm not sure if I am posting this in the correct catagory, if not I'm sorry in advanced.
I have a question about the adoption process. The agency I have been working with (for about 2 months) has not found any couples interested in being a match, so far they contacted and asked 2 couples and both said no. I'm having multiples, and I fear that although I have done everything the agency asked of me; a lot of people think it is a scam because of the multiple babies. I don't blame them, but on the other hand should I look into another agency? Should I give it more time? I thought it would go more smoothly than this. Is it like this for everyone? I'm not trying to solicit anyone, I just dont know what to do. Thank you for any advise.:thanks:
I have no answers but a thread awhile ago was discussing the fact that a particular agency charged adoptive parents a substantial amount over the standard fee to adopt twins...have you asked the agency if they charge adoptive parents more to adopt multiples and how much that is? If yes, it may be one of the reasons.
Kind regards,
Dickons
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I'm sure you've had ultrasounds that show you are having more than one? That should be in your file at the agency so people wanting to match can be assured it's not a scam?
The agency should have asked people ahead of time if they want to be considered for twins. We are waiting to be matched still, but when we started with our agency they asked us if we would be interested in multiples, disabled children, sibling groups, etc. We specifically stated that we would take multiples in case any matches happened. Maybe the agency does not any any couple that have specified that?
Have you talked with the agency and addressed your concerns? I think you need to do what you feel is best for you and if they are not meeting your needs, maybe you could look into other agencies or even adoption lawyers.
Thank you for all your answers. I've have spoke with the agency about this, and my caseworker has been just blowing it off saying how the right couple just hasnt came along. What they do not realize is that I'm in the middle of getting a divorce, I already have 2 kids, adjusting to being single again, and being pregnant with multiples, I dont need anymore added stress! My husband and I have fertility problems, and had to use IVF for all our successes. (Unfortunately there were some unsuccessful ones too.) This pregnancy was suppose to bring us all closes, but it just didnt happen that way. Anyway, the agency has ultrasounds, I did all the required paperwork, the have all the contact information for me and my doctor. I dont know what else to do. Maybe its the backlash of the Octo-Mom, does everyone hate multiples now or what? Thank God, I'm not having 8.... that is just insane.
I would definately find another agency if you are not happy with your current one and if they keep brushing you off. You need to feel secure and safe in the knowledge that the agency has yours and your childrens best interests at heart. From what you posted, it doesn't sound like the case. I know quite a few agencies that if they do not have any couples the birth family likes, they will go to other agencies. It does sound like you are really stressed out and I'm sorry that you have to go through this. There are plenty of waiting families out there that would love to have multiples.
The other option you have is to pick your own couple online and have that couple get a lawyer for both you and them and arrange the adoption outside of an agency. You could also just contact an adoption lawyer and they could probably help you find a family as well.
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