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I am very close to gettting my license to foster. I am EXTREMELY nervous and excited at the same time....:eek:
I thought it would be fun to hear about everyone's first foster placement...or, if you are still in the licensing process, what are your feelings on getting licensed and waiting for that first placement?:woohoo:
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Our very first placement was a 14 yr old girl. I got her straight out of a psych facility. Kinship placement--she'd been my student. She was beautiful and smart.
She was also incredibly manipulative.
She stayed with us for about 5 weeks before she falsely accused my oldest son of molesting her in retaliation for my removing her computer privileges for making an inappropriate post on my space. This happened the day after she "cut" her wrists, very superficial scratches that the p-doc said were not severe enough to warrant another hospitalization.
No one would take her--she had too many incidences of false accusations of sexual misconduct. I had to keep her and send my son to stay with his sister. The day after the accusation, it was decided that it would be safest (and the only option) to send her back to her mom who was living in a mission.
Her mom called me 5 days after taking her back to ask me if I wanted to keep in touch. I told her I wished her well and hung up.
Her mom started harassing my daughter who works at a rather ubiquitous store. S had to ask the store manager to help her out.
That was 3 years ago.
The girl recently had a baby.
Probably not the story you were hoping for!
I'm not counting a respite but my first *own* foster placement. I can clearly remember everything about it! I had actually just met the foster parents of my respite placement & dropped her back off. I was on the road going to meet my hubby who had already taken the truck in to get worked on when my cell phone rang. It was the one and only caseworker I knew. The same one that licensed me & repeatedly told me they NEVER got babies.. She called offering me a 2yr old boy that needed moved from another foster home &/or a newborn girl who was 1 day old & still in the hospital (seperate placements). I said YES immediately to the newborn & told her I'd talk to hubby about the 2yr old. We went shopping and bought all those little newborn things that we no longer had and then had to go home and wait an ENTIRE day before being able to pick my new daughter up at the hospital the next evening. I went to pick her up alone while dh stayed home and fed our kiddos supper. I remember walking into DCS and meeting the CW for the first time. Being shocked to meet the biomom as well and how young & skinny she was. I couldn't believe she had just had a baby 2days ago (hello, meth. ). The CW and I headed to the hospital & I was still shaking with excitement that I was going to be walking out with an itty bitty! They put us in one of the rooms while they got discharge papers ready. I got to hold her and count her little toes and fingers. Change her diaper and dress her in the going home outfit I'd bought her.. That was 4 1/2yrs ago and I can remember it like it was yesterday. Just like the birth of my biological children. Although we never got into foster care to adopt- 17months later that little newborn was adopted into our family. The first of many to join the family.
My 1st placement is my forever son!
It was 2/5/08, and I was eating lunch, around 11 (I'm a teacher- we eat early!). My cell phone rings and my friend says "is that your phone? It could be JustBabies" (the agency I trained through). Sure enough, it was! I was asked if I would accept placement of a 10 day old baby boy. OF COURSE I said yes- never, ever did I expect to get a NEWBORN! They said he would arrive at 3, he finally arrived about 6:30. I picked my class up from recess and attempted to teach some (I still wasn't positive he would come, but then they called and asked if I wanted a placement check, so I knew it WAS happening!). I left work early and stopped by Babies-R- Us and picked up some newborn stuff...
It was surreal- I'm eating lunch like any other day and less than 7 hours later I have a newborn at my house- who stayed at my house, and needed to eat every 4 hours, and who, BTW, was BEAUTIFUL! My colleagues who shared that phone call with me all feel a special connection to my little son.
My baby came straight from the hospital- he still had his id bracelet on and his umbilical cord attached. It was/is such an amazing experience!
This started the most amazing experience of my life; so amazing, in fact, I'm gearing up to start accepting placements again. My little man needs a sibling(s)!
I was licensed and received my first call on the same day. Since she was already in an emergency placement I had 3 days notice to prepare for her arrival.
She was 21 months when she arrived. As all the caseworkers left my house I remember thinking "Seriously you're leaving her with me. I don't know how to be a parent, I've only ever had a cat." She was was so cute but scared. She only understood Spanish and I only spoke English.
We had the honeymoon period, we had the unbelievable tantrum and outrageous behavior period and now six month later we are have a real life. I love her and she loves me.
Right now I am preparing her to be RU with her mom. I am sad for me, happy for the two of them and really nervous but hopeful for her well being in the future.
Being her fostermom has been a fantastic experience. I don't know if I'll do it again in the future but I'll cherish the past six months forever.
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UTbrie
I am very close to gettting my license to foster. I am EXTREMELY nervous and excited at the same time....:eek:
I thought it would be fun to hear about everyone's first foster placement...or, if you are still in the licensing process, what are your feelings on getting licensed and waiting for that first placement?:woohoo:
Our 1st placement was a 2 1/2 yr old, blonde haired, blue eyed angel with a little dimple chin. Almost identical to Shirley Temple. The moment I laid eyes on her, I fell in love and I knew she would break my heart. We totally enjoyed every minute of the 1 1/2 years we spent with her. She is turning 8 :eek: next month and we still keep in touch. She is in gifted classes and just skipped the second grade because she was too far ahead of all the other kids to be accomodated in the second grade classroom! We are soooo proud of her and proud of her dad who worked his butt off to get her back. Including kicking the crap out of his Meth addiction, working 60 hrs a week and then going to parenting classes, counseling, and NA meetings on top of that. As much as I wanted to be her mommy, I know in my heart she belongs with her daddy (and sibs). Hope you have as good a 1st experience as we did!:cheer:
I should also be honest and tell you that she definately had some emotional issues and was very hard headed! We loved her determined spirit, but could have done without the tantrums and pooping on the floor (on purpose). I forgot about that until just now! lol You should have seen my face when she threw her poop at me:eek:
We were licensed 12/17/08 and received our first placement on 12/27/08. They were an emergency placement of two little boys. At the time they were 22 months and 32 months (brothers). For the first month we didn't know how long they would be with us. In March we took their 4 year old brother and just this month we took their 8 year old sister. We are soon to be placed with their 20 month old sister. We went from no kids to will be 5 kids in 9 months! The case plan was concurrent/RU. Due to psychologists recommendations, physician recommendations, FCRB, parent aide, CPS the case plan was changed to severance and adoption. The TPR trial has begun and will extend into AT LEAST the end of October. (It's a pretty intense case) I know as foster parents we are supposed to support RU. I did for at least 6 months. We had a great relationship with the bios. They just aren't willing to change. They don't think they have done anything wrong. If TPR goes through I will hurt for them because they DO love their children but I pray everyday TPR goes through. These kiddos have been exposed to some terrible things and had lived a rough life with their parents. With this case it is LITERALLY a matter of life or death. SO although we are supposed to support RU no matter how hard it would be on us....sometimes you just CAN'T.
I'm still new to all this... I got licensed in January and got my first placement 3 days later! I was placed with a beautiful 2 day old baby boy, straight from the hospital! He's still with me and is now almost 7 months old. His goal is RU, but who know what will happen? Being his mom has been one of the most amazing experiences in my life! I'm so glad God intended for me to be a fostermom. I love it.
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My first fc was a 4 mo girl with what cps thought was chicken pox. Lo and behold it was actually impetigo and scabies. She looked so pathetic when I picked her up. I remember going to the store to get her some diapers and calling my mom and telling her that 'we' would be a few minutes late (I had been invited to dinner) as 'we' had to get diapers. I swore her to secrecy until I could get to their house. What an uproar!!! A good kind of uproar though. My family couldn't believe that I had a baby. I took the next day off of work to interview sitters and then had the weekend until I had to go back to work.
'Bug' was with me for exactly 2 months before being placed in her adoptive home. That was a Sunday and I cried and cried. I had Bible study that night and sat curled up into a ball and having my entire study group pray for me.
Since then I have had over 100 kiddos come and all but 3 of them have left (the ones I am currently fostering).
We received our first placement three weeks after we were licensed. We foster through a private agency which does permanency planning which basically means that the kids are high risk for TPR and if that happens, we agree to adopt...the goal is to prevent numerous placements or foster care drift. We had requested a placement of a little girl under 3. (We have two bio boys and one girl--so we thought we might even things out.) We got the call that there was a three week old little girl who had been exposed to drugs prenatally. She had been born with a heart defect and with webbed fingers and toes. We paused for just a minute because with three bio kids we wondered if we could handle a medically fragile infant, and then we said yes, of course we would take her. We went to the hospital and had to show our driver's licenses and then they just gave her to us. It seemed so strange after all the paperework and background checks and all the red tape. We got her home and immediately she had a follow up appointment with a pediatrician and then a cardiologist. She was fine! Her heart had healed itself and her toes and fingers weren't webbed. We were told by the social worker that there was no way she would be reunited and that there were no relatives. But within a week, her paternal grandfather had come forward. We had three wonderful and exhausting months with this little sweetheart. Her mother followed her plan and since the baby was no longer medically fragile, the judge said there was no reason she should still be in foster care. We were heartbroken, but also felt that she should be with her family. Her mother had been court ordered to attend all doctors appointments with me so we spent a lot of time together and she was very nurturing with "our" baby and we managed to build a good relationship although it was awkward at times. She was reunited with her mom, who now lives with the paternal grandfather. It was very, very, hard to say goodbye to this little one whom we all love. We have babysat her a few times and she is still doing well. We are now waiting for our next placement, nervously, but with excitement.
Our first placement came within days of being licensed. We picked up a two day old baby girl from the hospital. She was so precious! We had her for roughly 3 weeks. Even though it was such a short period of time, we were smitten. She went to a kinship placement that we'd never met and we haven't heard anything about her since :( I still think about her all the time though.
Our second and third placement (a sibling group - one year old girl and a 10 month old boy) came a few weeks after our first baby left. It was almost exactly a year ago today. The night before my baby started kindergarten. It was such an emotional evening. After all the kids went to bed I cried for hours. They were with us for a few months.
A year later, we are in the process of adopting our forth and fifth placements. Funny. Tomorrow my baby is starting 1st grade and we have a one year old and an eleven month old. LOL
Our first placement, a newborn we picked up from the hospital, was with us for 25 hours.
We had been licensed for just a few days last July when we received a call about a baby born testing positive for amphetamines. Mom had a precipitous labor and no prenatal care, which are red flags for healthcare folks, so I suppose this is why she was tested. Mom apparently swore up and down she'd never used any drugs and they'd allowed her to breastfeed in the hospital. (They even sent breast milk home with us but I wouldn't agree to use it until MD OK'd it). We picked her up at 4pm the next day. It was so strange to walk in to a hospital nursery and come out with a baby!! She was a cute little Asian baby that looked a lot like Winston Churchill. The next day at around 4pm we got a call that parents had been to court and Judge had returned baby to parents. Of course they wanted her ASAP, so we packed her up right away and brought her to the processing center for RU. All the way over, we were so nervous. We thought perhaps the parents would be rude to us or at least very angry about what they'd been through. They were actually a nice young couple. We have never heard anything further about her.
Good luck on your journey. Foster parenting is very rewarding, but I've found it to be incredibly difficult in ways I never expected.
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The same day we were certified we got a call for a newborn baby boy 2 days old. I went to the hospital to pick him up. What an amazing experience that was! The next day the worker called and said he was being moved to be with his 5 other sibs in another foster home. My DH and I cried that night! We were so close to being parents...all for a night and a half.
2 weeks later we received another placement of a 4 month old baby girl. She stayed with us for 6 months and 1 day and we missed her so much when she left. She was truly a little shirley temple when she smiled at you. The biggest blue eyes you've ever seen! What's kind of funny...the little FS we have now, looks just like her, except he's a boy!! :)
Best to you!
I was at work and got a phone call saying they had recieved our paperwork to be licensed and they had a sibling group of 4 did we want them? After saying but we are only license for 3 and her repeating several times its ok she finally said I have the power to over ride that do you want them? I said I have to ask dh we only agreed to 3. I called him he immediately said ok I called her back and she said sorry they are already placed. Aghh! The next day they called me back and said we have their 3 cousins that were all living in the same house we thought mom was clean but she is using again too do you want them? A Boy 1 1/2, a boy 2 1/2 and a girl almost 4. Of course this time I immediately said yes. They said we will have you licensed by 2 and them at your house by 3. We want them pulled from here before mom gets back from work. I had to call and wake dh up..he works nights..and send him and my son to buy 3 carseats at walmart. They were clueless and had someone help them that works there. She was very excited to see us come in that next weekend as he had told her all about what was going on. See still fawns over the kids every weekend when we go and buy our groceries. Dh was frantically trying to put the crib together when they showed up with the kids..lol That was 15 months ago and we are on round 2 of TPR. If it goes through this time we will be adopting them. Our entire family is so in love with these kids I can't imagine our life without them. The cousins got returned to their mom and dad last Dec. and I've heard are doing very well. By the way we started out as foster only but about 4 months into it my dh said these are my kids and no way I'm sending them to anyone else lets take the adoption class and change our status. Even if we don't get to keep these I want to keep some one of these days.
I can't believe how so many of you have gotten newborns. Super jealous of that!!