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DP and I just finished a week long seminar about money management. On the second to the last day of the seminar, the speaker talked about teaching your children good money management skills. Most of them were fairly obvious (e.g. give your child a piggy bank, allow children to "earn" money etc.) but some of them were rather controversial. One of them was the idea of saving up for your child's college tuition. Many parents felt that since their children were now adults, they should by able to survive on their own. Others felt that it is their "duty" to pay because parenting doesn't end when your children turn 18. I have to admit, it would have been nice if my mother-in-law had paid for DP's Masters degree because we JUST finished paying off her loans that she took out about 15 years ago. As for me, I went to a fancy private school but since I was poor, Black, did well in high school and neither of my parents graduated college, I was given many different scholarships (thank you affirmative action:flower: ). Anyways, do you guys feel its the parents or child's responsibility to pay for college? Have some of you already set aside some money for your children?
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Fe2002
I don't believe there is anyone on this thread that has claimed that they won't help their children through school. What I've read/interpreted from many is that they will help if they can, but if they can't.. well, they can't. My mom filled in her portion of the FAFSA and there was no way, NO WAY she could afford what they said she could afford. I knew it and she knew it. What good would it have done to make her feel guilty about not being able to afford to put me through college when she had done an amazing job of keeping me fed with a roof over my head. I truly don't get why a parent wouldn't at the bare minimum fill out the FAFSA. I know of some that have done that... and that is just plain wrong. I paid my own way through college and it took longer than 4 years. For the most part I worked full time (40 hrs/wk) and took night classes and weekend classes. You can carry a full load (12 credit hrs) by doing this... (Tu/TH classes 6-8p and 8-10p) and Sat (8a-12n and 12n-3p). It's not easy, but it's doable. As I approached the finish line, I quit my job (totally hated the job), lived on student loans and slammed out about 15-18 credit hrs in one summer. Grad school? Same thing... night and wkend classes. Yes, I'm still paying on student loans and will be for sometime... but I'm okay with that.
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karla-k
[QUOTE=aclee]It says in several places DEPENDANT students. [QUOTE] The federal gov't is going to assume that you are dependant if you are under a certain age, like 22 or 23. It is up to you to prove that you are not dependent and only the reasons outlined in PP's post are the proof they will accept.
I think 24 is the magical number when you get to dump your parents for fasfa, depends on what month you were born in and the magic number when the car and health insurances dump 'dependants' of parents policies. Basically if you are smart and you have no school money, and your parents can't help but have income, it could be best to work until you are that age and then apply. But don't work too much if you are counting on aid, or you will still be in the same boat. There is a calulator thing that is a great way to guestimate your furture EFC (Expected Family Contribution) and what kind of costs and Student and Financial Aid you may expect to recieve. And additional help, it all takes a bit of study, and time, best not to wait and assume [url=http://studentaid.ed.gov/PORTALSWebApp/students/english/funding.jsp]Student Aid on the Web[/url] a must read :)
Maybe one day every student will have the opportunity to go to college if they want to, regardless of how much income they and their family has or chooses to contribute. I truly believe free public school shouldn't end until grade 16 - for EVERYONE, regardless of how much they have contributed to our community college fund. At the least, until grade 14. It would be for every citizen's benefit to make that happen. I just hate seeing a person's dreams squashed or stressed until they give up hope - when they find out how much Aid they Don't get from the gov't. Sorry, feeling motivational today LOL The heights by great men reached and kept, were not attained by sudden flight, but they, while their companions slept, were toiling upward in the night.Ӕ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow. Pay it Forward - it doesn't hurt as much as paying it afterward $25 x 52 weeks x 18 years + interest + Student & Financial Aid & Scholarships = you can make it happen, so they can make it happen. or $1000 child tax credit x 18 years + interest + Student & Financial Aid & Scholarships = obtainable. #1 bit of advice I can share is to get in the scholarship and aid line early, they do run out of $, leaving you and yours without.
I haven't read all of the discussion on this (just got back from vacation), but we had a similar conversation at work a few weeks ago. I found that there is a lot of difference in people's opinions in how they were raised and / or their socio-economic background. I grew up never doubting that I would go to college. My parents went, all of their friends went, everyone's kids that were older than me went. Most of our grandparents went. I never knew it was a choice. I thought it was like high school - you just went to college after you graduated from high school. I am raising my kiddos to think the same way. Which I guess means I will be paying for some / most / all of it. I worked after school in high school and summers, and sometimes during the year in college for spending money. I didn't qualify for any need based aid, but I had scholarships because of my high test scores, good grades, etc.
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[url=http://www.fastweb.com/college-search/articles/2025-whos-getting-into-college?page=1]Who's Getting Into College - Fastweb[/url] great article about money and how colleges are choosing to take $ to stay alive, very interesting. The college money scene is changing due to our economy. endowments are down they are choosing out of state students - more money foreign students - don't qualify for state aid students and parents who can pay The big national question is: What do you do to make great education accessible to talented students whose families are not wealthy?Ӕ he said. As a country, we have moved in the opposite direction. We wonӒt see the full damage for a generation,... fastweb is a very helpful website for scholarships
First time replying to a thread without reading it all... :rolleyes: I know the subject leads to lots of passionate opinions. My father, a self made milllionaire, felt because he put himself through college (while not paying child support or seeing us more than once a year, but i digress), his children should do that same I made it - second time through (flunked out first time; made through masters in my late 20s). My 3 siblings did not. While I did witness kids having a good time on their parent's dime, I don't think parents contributing tuition is the sole cause of young adults not taking school seriously. I did it the hard way - living in an uninsulated 10x40 trailer with my DH, morton's pot pies & ramen noodles. No health care- living with bronchitis and ear infections because I couldn't afford to get help. Crying at night, not knowing how we pay for oil. I didn't go to a fancy school, just a state university. I applied for every pell grant, scholarship I could find. But wading through that process is tough when you are on your own I swore I wouldn't inflict that on another person. Not only did it cause me to grow up (harden) faster than might have otherwise been necessary, it didn't help our (my siblings' and my) chances for success. If anything, it made the odds of finishing school smaller. The slightest bump is amplified when you don't have a cushion. I believe the spoiled kids in college ARE spoiled kids - period. The problem is bigger than who paid or their school
Fastweb is indeed a great resource for scholarships (our college counselor at my high school took about 30 minutes walking us through that website and encouraging us to use it when I was a sophomore or junior).Anyway, wcurry...I think you are spot on. My dad came from the most rural part of Kentucky with $12 in his pocket and no connections to anyone in the city. He, fortunately, had the GI Bill from being in the Air Force to cover his tuition, but he had to work full time and attend class in order to survive. He ended up not finishing college (he got close, but couldn't pass up a job because he needed the money) and still regrets not finishing. My dad is the only one from his side of the family who even had ANY college.He never wanted me to be under that much stress through school if I didn't have to be. My parents have always told me, even in high school, that they don't expect me to work if I'm in school full-time (I can if I want to, but they'll pay for school expenses). They want me to be able to concentrate on school.Trust me, I'm no partier. I don't care for that. My parents have been paying for whatever my scholarship doesn't cover (which pretty much means books). They also pay for my cousin's school expenses since his dad can't afford it. They are essentially handing my cousin and I our college educations. BUT, because my cousin and I put a lot of stock in our education, are dedicated to getting degrees and learning, and are focused on doing well for ourselves, I don't think my parents see any problem with it.You don't always have to pay for something yourself in order to value it...you also don't have to value it if you pay for it yourself (my other cousin is a case in point for that one...she still owes a community college money for classes that she flunked out of because she wasn't focused).
TwinkleKS
I grew up never doubting that I would go to college. My parents went, all of their friends went, everyone's kids that were older than me went. Most of our grandparents went. I never knew it was a choice. I thought it was like high school - you just went to college after you graduated from high school. I am raising my kiddos to think the same way. Which I guess means I will be paying for some / most / all of it.
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I just reread my reply and I hope no one thinks that I'm trying to guilt people into paying for their kids' college education...I'm not, I'm just giving another side...my side.Just wanted to throw that out there.Also:This is how it's always been for me too. I mean, my parents would have supported me if I had chosen not to go...but, in general, it's just always kind of been known that college comes after high school lol...
sbaglio
Where I come from, there is no such thing as high school graduation - it is just a step to the next level.
eagleswings216
You are right that this is not ALWAYS the case, but for most people, especially late teens or early 20's who have had everything just handed to them, they don't value something until they have to start working for it. It sounds like you weren't raised that way, and neither was I, but I live in an area with 5 colleges within an hour, and we see it ALL the time, especially at the largest state college. Many of the students are very entitled and think everything should be done for them. It's really a shame.
Sarah...hpfreak, Don't feel like you're guilt tripping :) I think your post proves a point, that sometimes one has to evaluate a child on a case by case basis and see what would be best for them....some kids may do well with education being paid for, others may not (although I guess that would be tricky if you have more than one kid...more thought on that needed lol) I'm not a tightwad.....through paying for college I DO appreciate what I worked for and have become way better with money....my parents didn't have money when I was growing up....they really only ended up having one kid; me, because they were very strapped for money....however, the money that they did have, they spent it all on me....you wouldn't think I came from a poor home...very sacrificial....but my personality was the type where I had to work hard for my stuff before I appreciated it.
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hpfreak080
Dannie! Thank you for your eloquence! If only I could have expressed my thoughts like that, I could have saved myself a lot of keystrokes lol Anyway, yes, that's what I mean...