riverside county adoption

Hello! We are waiting with Riverside County as well. We attended orientation in August of 2010, began PRIDE training in Jan 2011 and were officially waiting as of September 2011, It took 9 months for my finger prints to clear! So all in all it took over 1 year from orientation to full approval. We have had one failed match w/a 14mo old (our age is 0-12mo so it was a little over) on Dec 23 of 2011 due to the fact that we were matched very shortly after my mom was diagnosed with cancer and we were in such a state of turmoil that we could not accept. It has been an EXTREMELY long road. I try and email the SW every few weeks just to make myself feel better, knowing that she knows we're still here. Last week she said that we had been put up with a few babies but other couples with our same criteria who had been waiting longer had been chosen. However, she said that it was a good sign that we were "in the mix" of families being potentially matched, as that means we are getting close. She said she thinks that it is only a matter of time. I really hope that is the case. It has been 6 months since we finished have been "waiting" so we are very close to being at the two year mark in this process. Our SW is great and I don't that that she'd tell me that we are "getting close" if it wasn't true, as she isn't the type to "blow sunshine". She definitely tells it as it is! I just wish the phone would finally ring.

If you've been "put in the mix" I'd expect a phone call before too much longer. I've heard SW's say that you're close and they typically mean it! The wait can be long, but is so worth it! And when you look back, it won't seem like long at all. Hang in there!

We have been doing transitional visits with our soon to be adopted kids :) We hope to have them move in with us in a couple weeks at the latest.The TPR hearing is in June. Family and Parental visits have already ended.We took the older one with us camping this weekend, and it was just awesome! We will be having dinner with them on Wed, and than taking both for an overnighter on Sat/Sunday, culminating in an Easter Egg hunt and dinner at my husbands Grandmothers house :)So far so good....Tam

I am happy to hear that it is going well! That is exciting.

Baby girl was placed with us last Monday. Parents have not returned SW calls in last 2 weeks to set up new visitation schedule. Bio mom just posted on FB that she is homeless. Maternal grandma just posted on FB asking for help "from anyone" to stop the adoption. (she's not eligible to adopt). I'm so terrified of losing this baby. Pretty much all close relatives have records including child abuse/neglect charges. In fact, grandpa is in jail currently for child battery. But what happens if a second cousin or great aunt comes from out of state? Statute says in CA only grandparents, aunts and uncles have preferential placement. how are the current judges in riverside and which way are they swaying? More services/no tpr, etc..?

Im guessing that if they have already ended services, and stopped visits (or the parents have stopped coming), then it is headed to the 2-6 hearing (Termination of Parental Rights). Once they set the date, you can breath a tiny bit easier. It just means that they have exhausted all options of placements with relatives, and are moved on to permanency. Have you been selected as her Preadoptive Placement?Good Luck and God Bless!Tam

My partner and I are in Riverside County as well. We had the first portion of our homestudy done 2 weeks ago and I hope to have it finialized by the end of this month. Im starting to get so excited but I do realize its probably going to be a hurry up and wait type of thing. Im so happy to read about the successful placements some of you have had!

Well bios had a hearing today to term services. They got a 1 month extension in which they must submit to a drug test and then the next hearing is June 5. Bio mom said at the hearing that she is moving out of state w/ a family member who was also found to be unfit to care for baby. It just keeps getting stranger and stranger. I'm guessing if mom leaves the state it's good for us? She didn't ask how baby was doing or where she was and didn't even request to see her before moving. it seems like she is just going through the motions. Visits will now be set for dad who SW does not expect to show. This process is crazy to go through when the parents want to fight enough to hold it up but are not really dedicated.!

I've been in your shoes and it can be frustrating with the extensions and hearings and all the behind the scenes grief. Just hold strong. But, I must say that after having gone through this process I have a better understanding of what the bio parents are going through too. While bio mom and dad might not necessarily want to parent, it is difficult to have a baby TAKEN away from you and have you deemed unfit. It is emotional to carry a baby for 9 months and then lose your child - even if you cannot care for her. In addition, I have no idea what kind of background or circumstances the bio parents come from but it doesn't sound like they have a good support system or role models. Maybe they don't even know what good parents look like? Therefore, every time I went to court and was frustrated as heck because the judge gave an extension or the bio parents were downright RUDE to me, I had to remember what they were going through and that they were forever linked to my child. I TRIED to offer just a small happy memory of something the baby was doing. Don't get my wrong, I wasn't always successful at keeping my emotions in check. However, at the end of the process I was the parent and my child belongs to me now. And I can honestly look in the mirror and know that I TRIED my best to be understanding to the bio parents. Sorry for the long rant. I do feel your pain when the bio parents are downright nasty but I don't think they know how to deal with the situation either. Its hard for everyone. Good luck!

Hi All, I thought I would introduce myself. My husband and I are in the process of the Riverside County Foster to Adopt program. We attended the orientation in January of 2011. We started our PRIDE classes in August and finally finished them in February of 2012. Per our SW, our home study has been finished since the end of March, and she is just waiting for final approval from her supervisor to be put in the matching book. Our SW told us that once we are in the book that it will be at least 9-12 months before we are even considered for matching. What a process this has been. I feel like everything just goes so slowly. Has anyone else felt this way about this county? Does anyone else feel like they take forever to move things along? Anyway, I'm very excited to be a part of the forums. Thanks for listening! TTownGal

It does indeed seem like it takes forever!We went to orientation 01/29/2010Sent in application package 02/01/2010Finished our classes 6/26/2010Homestudy completed 08/28/2010APPROVED and waiting 11/17/2010 First Placement 04/13/2011Second and hopefully last placement (transition begins 3/25/2012)It took over a year from Orientation to the first placement, and another year to the second placement. It is totally worth the wait! Hang in there:)

I don't mean to sound like I'm not empathetic, I am. In fact, both my husband and social worker claim that I have been too empathetic toward them. I would offer contact (minimal) but as of now the social worker is recommending no contact after she is officially adopted, as he does not feel that it would be safe for our family. He also doesn't want me to have any type of interaction with the bios if they show up for supervised visits. I feel terrible that they are losing thier child but I also know, as does the social worker, that she will be back in the system in no time if they take her home. I guess my empathy is starting to dwindle as I hear things such as the mother says that she is leaving the state and the father is suddenly saying that she is not his. Supposedly there is a paternal relative that wants to adopt her but this has been going on for months and no one has stepped forward. I don't know that she will considering that the father is now trying to deny paternity. There is definately no support system, and I find that very sad. it is very clearly a case of neither parent knowing how to parent appropriately. It is a generational issue. I know that if I were even living a lifestyle where there was a chance my child would be removed, tons of my family members would step up to straighten me out. I know that if my child were ever removed, those same relatives would be lining up to care for her. Not allow her to sit in foster care for 3/4 of her life. It really is sad, how you learn the way that so many people live thier lives. It makes me want to foster, although I know my husband would never go for straight foster as long as our son is little. Maybe it is something I will do when he is older. anyway, sorry for this long rant! :arrow:

Hello! Here is my timeline, just to give you an idea. Orientation August 2010 Fingerprinted Nov 2010 Start Pride classes Jan 2011 Finish Pride April 2011 Homestudy done July 2011 August 2011 my fingerprints FINALLY cleared after 3 tries and 9 months of waiting. August 2011 state approval Final approval Sept. 2011 First match Dec 23, 2011..We couldnt take it as the my mother had just been diagnosed with cancer (we were acutally at the hospital when SW called) We didnt know what my role would be and thought it would be unfair to the child if I was unable to give her the time and attention she needed. Second match April 12th, full disclosure on April 19 and home with us on April 23 after 2 visits. So I guess it was only 3 months from finalization to first match and then another 3 months to 2nd match. But yes, it is a very loooong process, and it doesnt end when you get placed, the stress and worry just gets worse!:hissy: Well unless you are lucky and manage an open and shut case! I think it depends on your criteria and I also think it depends on your contact with the SW. I emailed her occassionally to give her little updates on our family and things like that. It might have had nothing to do with it, but I liked knowing that I was putting myself in her thoughts at least occassionally. Good luck and I hope it happens quickly for you! I know how excruciating the wait can be, and wondering all the time if that phone is going to ring. Just remember, if you have a BLOCKED call coming through, PICK IT UP!

Hi TTownGal, Welcome to Rivrside County... I pray your journey would be a smooth one.... As you can tell from my siggy it's been along one for us not to mention emotional but I have to say it was worth the ride and so we sit and wait some more....:popcorn:

Congratulations!! We are fost/adopt and in December were certified in neighboring LA County. We had our ffd ("former foster daughter") aka lil' pumpkin (12months) and first placement after turning down several others. Unfortunately, despite the cw's statements and us being very cautious, she was moved to an aunt just yesterday after being with us for 3 months. The experience is heart wrenching, crushing and painful, and, for obvious reasons, I encourage you to avoid at all costs. My advice to you is:1) Ask questions, then ask again, and then ask more questions. Don't assume anything about the child welfare system in California! Even when you get answers, at best, believe 75% of what they tell you and discard the rest.2) Don't just plan for worst case scenario, live the worst case scenario because it really may happen. Everyone thinks 'oh but it won't happen to me....' until it does. Hope for the best case but love your child every minute of every day, because as they say, 'tomorrow is promised to no one'. 3) Use these forums for advice, to vent, research, etc. They are a VALUABLE resource!!! I could not have made it this far without the people on these pages. Knowing that you are not alone is a critical part of your support system. 4) Last, be excited about your future child and remind yourself why you started this journey. Those reminders will help you through the uncertainty and stress. Good luck from one bruised, battered but hopeful and smiling fost/adopt parent.