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Hi Everyone!
My name is Joe - and i'm an alch.. oh wait, wrong board... just kidding.
My name IS Joe, and my partner and I have recently begun the (apparently long) process of adoption! We met with an extremely nice lady the other day from DYFS. She took our application, answered a lot of questions, asked us a lot of questions - took a look around the house - and was actually very encouraging. She almost jumped out of her seat when we said we would love to adopt "older" (0-8) children, and would love a sibling group. Apparently this is not the norm? It rally makes me sad that a child that is 5 years old is considered "un-adoptable."
Anyway, we'd love any advice anyone has to offer. We're looking to be as ahead of the game as we can be. We've begun organizing the house, getting things in order. We have 2 dogs, so we have all of their paperwork ready, our physicals are scheduled soon, we're moving things out of reach (meds, cleaning products, etc..) and a few other things. I know - we're jumping ahead here, but why not!
I could go on and on - but I don't think anyone wants to read a novel right now. Feel free to say hi and please - any words of wisdom, advice - throw our way!
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Hi Joe!
Welcome to the crazy world of fostering and adoption. Are you planning on fostering to adopt or just straight adopt? Have you scheduled your PRIDE classes yet?
My husband and I are from Monmouth County and we've been licensed one year and have had three placements. We are foster to adopt and straight adopt. We have had mostly positive experiences working with DYFS. We have found most workers to be pleasant and easy to work with. Please feel free to ask any questions/vent if you need to and best of luck to you and your partner as you begin the process. - Kate
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Joe - Nice to meet you! My partner and I (we are both women) were licensed this spring and got a sibling group placed with us in June - One sibling went home, the other one won't be going home for a while or may become adoptable (and his little brother may come back into foster care at some point for all we know). Welcome to a life of lots of unknowns. Fostering and foster-adoption is NOT an easy way to adopt, but it's a great way to impact children's lives. I am thrilled to hear you are open to older kids. Our foster son is 9 and he's amazing,though he has some very intense emotional and behavioral issues, which you should expect will be there for any child you foster or adopt even if DYFS tries to tell you they don't have issues. What county are you in? We're in Bergen Co. I can talk more openly via e-mail or private message, so shoot me a PM if you want more info. I am happy to talk to you in great detail about what to expect :)BTW, DYFS will indeed be kissing the ground you walk on if you're legitimately interested in (and truly prepared for) sibling sets and/or kids over the age of 5.
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Sure! You're right, FS is foster son. TPR=termination of parental rights (when judge terminates biological parents' rights to child, freeing child for adoption). ID'd surrender is an identified surrender in which the bio parents surrender their rights to their child directly to the party identified, usually the family that has been caring for the child.
Hey!Welcome! It's a bumpy ride but you guys can really make a difference in a child's (or children's) life.I adopted a 15 year old out of DYFS so if you have any questions that I can help you with, feel free to PM. Not sure where you are from but there are a bunch of us out here in the wilds of Jersey.Best of luck and congratulations on your decision.
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Glad to meet you. Sounds like you have good hearts.This is an awesome message board and saved my butt (and sanity) quite a few times.Sometimes, especially when dealing with DYFS, you will question your sanity. But that is normal;) Expect the unexpected - and a lot of questions - and phone calls - and visits from social workers, and you will be fine.Sounds like you have a great sense of humor and we sure all appreciate that.A little black humor makes the day go by faster:)