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My husband and I brought our son home from the hospital at 3 days old. His mother is my half sister who decided that she was not going to keep and raise him. Our adoption was finalized when he was 5 months old at the time she claimed she could not name the father because it could have been multiple people. When he was 10 months old we received court papers stating someone had petitioned for a paternity test. I later learned that my sister was behind this and that she got this kid to come forward as the father because she did not like the fact that I confronted her about her drug use, promiscuous lifestyle and lacking concern for her children (she has 3 other children who are in my mothers care). Well this kid came forward and petitioned the courts and was granted a paternity test. Flash forward seven months and he was proven to be the father and our adoption was overturned. We expressed our concerns about this guys living situation (he lives with a mother who has drug and mental health issues and also a criminal record and is on probation). He has told us that he didn't want to take him but wanted to be a part of his life he said he was young and not stable to raise a child. Well now he has changed his mind and is contesting the new adoption. Has anyone had to deal with this situation? Will the courts just take our child and place him with unstable strangers? We are completely heart broken and worried.
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I would hire an attorney who specializes in dependency law. More than likely the judge will grant you a hearing, and any petition or motions you might have. The attorney can file motions concerning the move, and whats the best interest of the child. The biosҒ can be bank robbers, but as long as they are following court orders such as probation, CPS or social services doesnt care. FathersҒ rights are very strong, especially in California where I live. But, if both bios have past history with CPS or social services, and that can work in your favor; the court can appoint you an attorney if you cannot afford one. Any statements the father makes needs to be brought in front of the judge, and questioned. DonҒt rely on CPS to do it. What is the Best interest for the child? The court will not just remove the child because the father changed his mind, but he could be offered services by social services. Good luck...
Attended Foster Care Orientation 11/19/2010
Application submitted 11/21/2010
State foster home application accepted 3/1/2011
Medical Physicals 2/2011
County Interviews 3/2011
Classes start & finished 4/14/2011-6/23/2011
First Aide classes 6/30/2011
Passed Home Inspection (State) 11/02/2011
Live scans; county and state: started 4/26/2011 finally ended 9/2011
Due to Riverside County misplacing or not transmitting prints
First half of our Home study completed 12/22/2011
Second half of our Home study completed 01/ 05/2012
FINALLY APPROVED and officially on waiting list 05/08/2012 due to
under staffing at Riverside County.
First placement: 6/10/2012 until 8/01/2012; we miss them so much.
Second match 12/02/12: sibling set boy and a girl; a family aunt was targeted one day after being matched.
Third match 02/15/13: little boy; again within an hour of being matched a family member came forward.
Fourth match 03/02/13: Emom chose us to adopter her child after birth; two weeks before due date Emom vanishes. Riverside County does nothing, and places us back on waiting list.
Fifth match 06/5/13: We go concurrent, a newborn baby girl; picked her up directly from the hospital.
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It sounds like somehow the father's rights were not legally terminated. Generally, whether a father is known or not, the courts terminate rights on any known or unknown father precisely because of the situation you dealing with now.The short answer is yes, the judge could remove him from your care and place him with his father. Since father's rights were not terminated, he retains the right to parent. Some states will say that he waited too long to come forward and deny the petition; others will say fathers have the rights to raise their children. Different states have different laws on this, and you will want to consult with an attorney (get a Quad-A attorney) as they will best know the ins and outs of the laws in your state.
Can you reach out to him without it being through your sister?
I think your sister is obviously being vindictive and pushing a lot of this and basically instructing him behind the scenes. If you can contact him when he's alone, you might be able to work something out that works for everyone before it has to turn into a battle in the courts again.
Would you be open to him having supervised visitation, for instance? He might be being cajoled to going for sole custody by your sister but personally just want to have some involvement with his child.
Or if you offered picture updates and emails, that might satisfy him. Sometimes first parents just don't want the mystery of not knowing anything about their child. Not even knowing if their child is dead or alive. Giving him something and finding some compromise might make him call off his legal pursuits and give you a position of power to negotiate from that's better than with all the middle men of courts and lawyers.
I feel like when he told you he just wanted to be involved it was the truth and he was being honest but then your sister found out and is pushing him to do this.
You need to remove your sister from it and deal with HIM and him alone. His [potential] rights and role as a father is separate from your sister's rights (and issues).