Advertisements
My husband and I are considering adopting a daughter from foster care. We haven't even begun this process but are wanting an "older" child. We have two boys ages 6 and 12. The 12 year old is dead set against having a little sister that is not a baby. We definitely would not adopt a child older than him, but he feels it would be weird for a stranger to come into the home that is not a baby. I know this would be a major adjustment for everyone, but I don't want him to resent the child. Did anyone else have this problem and what advice can you give if any?
Like
Share
To be honest - time solves everything. Even if he is upset at first, I doubt he'll stay that way for long. Especially if you can explain why you are adopting and how much you love him and always will, etc. Try to find out where his resentment comes from and then calm his fears. Hope that helps!
Advertisements
My husband and I have just begun the adoption process. Waiting on our home study now. We also have a birth child. She is four and for as long as I can remember, has begged us for an older brother (without any prior knowledge of adoption!) I guess she knew we were supposed to adopt before we did :)I'm sure your son will come around to the idea. My daughter really really wants a brother but is not quite as open to the idea of a sister. About once a week my daughter and I sit down on the couch and scroll through the seemingly endless adoption photolisting Maybe it would help for him to feel like he is more involved in the decision making and has some sort of control or opinion on the "stranger" coming into his home. Make it a family ordeal! Good luck!
Last update on November 17, 11:06 am by Sachin Gupta.