Can a white person adopt a black child and still be racist??

You have no idea. They had actually dated for 7 yrs on and off and by that I mean (NO KIDDING) dumped her 50 times!! I stopped counting after that. He kept telling her he just couldnt see him marrying a AA woman. So sad because she has 2 teenage boys and what example is she setting for them?? I only found out they got married this past October a month ago from someone who randomly told me. Needless to say I was blown away!! I guess she finally got what she wanted :grr:

supamodel: OMG!! There are no words!! This was years ago. It wasn't an adoption but a CC racist woman raisng a biracial granddaughter. It was on Montel and they were finding fathers. The daughter asked how the mother could leave her; the grandmother and other family called her names. It was so sad.

I find it hard to believe people with attitudes like this would make it through the home study & be approved to adopt a child of another ethnic group. I would think social workers would pick up on it.

If it's not obvious, I can see social workers not picking up on it. They don't want to see obvious signs and racists can be subtle about it.

Our social worker was awesome. She asked questions like "when your child grows up, if he/she wanted to date your friend's kids or your neighbors- kids, how would they react? How would you?" I think it's important to get folks to thinking about teenagers, not just infants. However since my hubby and I are an interracial couple, we obviously had btdt personally so we knew what challenges our child might face and how we'd support him/her. Even though we're interracial, she still had a lot of questions about our friends-the people who are regularly in our home. She liked that we have a lot of diversity in our close friends and live in a neighborhood that is very diverse. I think the only question that stumped us was, when we said we were open to any race, how we'd manage if we were matched with a CC baby. We'd honestly never really thought about that. . .

Those poor boys! :grr: And what a prize THAT guy is. Wow. As for SW's, ours was fantastic. Really put us through our paces on adopting outside our race. EVERY social worker should be so diligent. Just as there are SW's who do a great job like ours, there are those who couldn't care less about their job, and don't really press their clients on racial issues.

[QUOTE=SupaModel]I had a friend who is AA and she was dating (recently married) this CC guy who told her that he wanted to have a baby with her BUT didnt want a black baby so he asked if she would carry a CC egg with his sperm!!! I am NOT kidding!!! She actually married this freak. Needless to say we arent friends anymore.[/QUOTE :eek: WHAT?!

Supa, well it's easy to see why you aren't friends anymore...is she a masochist or what? It's hard to fathom why in the world any woman would subject herself to such a loathsome creature. Do you think she'll actually do what he wants and carry a CC egg?? I think I'll add her to my list of people I pray for...she needs all the help she can get.

His "son" has never been formally adopted nor does he hold US citizenship. [url=http://www.pressherald.com/news/jamaican-joined-lepage-household-as-teen_2011-01-16.html]Jamaican joined LePage household as teen | The Portland Press Herald / Maine Sunday Telegram[/url] Kind regards,Dickons

I wouldn't say he sound rasist,I don't care to celebrate MLK jr. Day.I also don't care much about NAACP,but I also don't hate them.Of course if I adopted a child I would want him to know about MLK jr. and history,but I wouldn't call this man racist.

I think so, absolutely. Why else are light-colored children more adoptable, on the whole, by white people? I think some white adoptive parents feel that since their child will be white culturally (or such is their intent), that the child is "white with a suntan," if that makes any sense. What do we mean by "black"? Skin culture or culture? Answering that is complex and many-faceted. I think many white people are the equivalent of tone-deaf to many considerations of racial and cultural differences. In that sense, they are prejudiced, from believing that there is only one culture (their own). If that makes sense.

Fantastic points. Our agency would not let us choose the box for bi-racial, if we were not also checking the AA box. It never occurred to me at the time that people would do that, and that a rule would have to be made for those that did. DH and I are taking a class at church called "Building a Better World", it's all about learning the intricate day-to-day prejudices and outright racism that people of color face, and how we can all work together to stop it. The church I attend is VERY open-minded and heavily into social justice programs, yet I am shocked at the number of people (all white) who HAVE NO IDEA that they take part in white privilege. It's astounding, really. Culturally, whites (yes, I am white) just assume the rest of the world should assimilate.

jcm: Why wouldnt they let you choose bi-racial as a category? There can be alot of mixes that do not include AA and still be bi-racial? Weird. When we were getting licensed, they asked us what we are open to. We said we would love to have any race but our preference would be bi-racial since Dh and I are not of the same culture/race and we heard these children have a hard time finding homes. The social worker asked if we were open to CC because we didnt mention it. We said of course. So, she puts us in for all these bi-racial children and our matched is two CC kids.

Yes, you can be racist and adopt a child of color. Haven't you heard the expression "raising the child white." Apparently something is wrong with being "raised black" whatever that is... This thing works all kinds of ways... We used to have a member on this forum who was married to someone of another race and said she would not be having a biological child with him because she didn't want to have a child by someone of another race. Why did she marry him? That had me scratching my head...

If I were in charge of the adoption process, I would institute a rule that you can either check "same race" or "any race", period. I suppose you could have an exception for a very specific reason, say if your great grandfather was Vietnamese but you were white and you specifically wanted a Vietnamese child, but in general I'd say no. And maybe I don't even think that exception is a good idea. Living here in CR, you get to know what people really think. There is no concept of political correctness. The people who want to adopt Vietnamese children are often quite racist against other races and that translates as serious insensitivity, even toward those the do "like". (We have a large Vietnamese minority for complex reasons.) My friend who is a very nice person but admits she is prejudiced against Roma, adopted a Vietnamese child. When I offered to teach her to make Vietnamese spring rolls, since some of my relatives are Vietnamese and I can actually do it right, she was shocked. She didn't get why she or her daughter should know anything about Vietnamese culture. I love this friend. I just think she probably should have had to take a lot of cultural sensitivity classes before adopting a child of any other race but her own. I think if you are too hung up to check "any race" then you probably have no business adopting a child from outside of your own race and culture. But if I made that as a standard of who I will be friends with, we would be completely socially isolated over here.