millie58

Some adoptees don't have a need to know their biological parents.

As a single parent, I'll be honest: while there's no one to contradict you regarding parenting, disciplining, etc., it would be nice to have someone to bounce ideas off of; someone who could take over once in a while; and as a mom to boys, yes they need a male in their lives. Mine had Big Brothers. all were ok but the youngest who decided he didn't want one a few years ago but needs one now.

The difference would come from the fact that an adopted child (especially a fost/adopted child) will have experienced trauma and the parents have to know how to deal with that.

In NY, it only cost if you use your own attorney. The homestudy and fingerprinting were done before I was licensed. For the adoption, I was given a list of names and the county pays their fee.

I did it for ethnicity reasons (I'm not an adoptee) but I found a first cousin who no one knew about. Good luck!

Yes but the ignorance is mind-blowing.

In NY, they do a background check and a fingerprint check. I also had to list past addresses back to 1977 and give 3 references that weren't relatives. This is in addition to passing the homestudy.

Actually, when you go to court, the adoption is a done deal. The home study proves you have a stable home for any kids you foster/adopt. In court, the judge just tell the prospective parents that the adoptive child is now like a biological child. He/she bangs the gavel and it's done.

No experience but in NY, they look at the criminal past and child abuse history. Your husband may want to tell your worker about the abuse so he/she's aware but since he's clean, it shouldn't be a problem.