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[URL="http://my.adoption.com/Pained"]Pained[/URL] 
vbmenu_register("postmenu_34129685", true); Junior MemberJoin Date: Jan 2011Posts: 1 Total Points: 131.40[URL="http://forums.adoption.com/vbplaza.php?do=donate&userid=243866"]Donate[/URL]father had children in previous marriage sorry i don't know how to start new thread..i have just discovered i have 2 half sisters who are local and knew about me and my 2 sisters but we never knew about them or my dad's previous marriage. they were raised by there grand parents as their mother was an alcoholic and died 6 years ago. we cannot meet them as my mothers family still do not know about this. my parents were upset at us finding out and have been understanding.My middle sister is coping fine but she has a family and career to keep her busy. My oldest sister, we have not told as do not think she would cope. we found out by accident as one of the girls daughters face booked us. my father has had some contact with them over the years only. I know no one is to blame and i eel for both my parents and the girls. I haven't really spoken to my father about it because it is still too painful. I have cried for 7 days solid and do not feel i can ever be the same person again. i feel all of my memories are not tainted --every good memory i have, i can't help think, oh when that happened, i wonder if my dad was thinking about his other daughter and i wonder what she was doing then. My life and my world has been turned upside down.I am angry at the grandaughter who messaged us because her mother and aunt had not told us in 40 years so what gave her the right? I am a bit angry at one of the girls (my fathers daughter) for showing up at family functions when we were there and putting my parents under a lot of stress.My father made it clear he wanted no contact and she could never be a part of the family. she befriended my aunts and started showing up. I feel she should have respected his wishes. He paid her maintenance and made sure she would have a good upbringing with her grand parents. he was very young at the time and it was her mother who divorced him.Anyway, i just wonder if anyone has any advice whatsover as to whether or not this pain will ever subside and will my relationship with my father(whom i used to be very close to ) will ever be the same?i feel like a light has gone out in me and will never return. family secrets are poisoness and i wish my parents had told us sooner but they somehow felt they couldn't...
vbmenu_register("postmenu_34129685", true); Junior MemberJoin Date: Jan 2011Posts: 1 Total Points: 131.40[URL="http://forums.adoption.com/vbplaza.php?do=donate&userid=243866"]Donate[/URL]father had children in previous marriage sorry i don't know how to start new thread..i have just discovered i have 2 half sisters who are local and knew about me and my 2 sisters but we never knew about them or my dad's previous marriage. they were raised by there grand parents as their mother was an alcoholic and died 6 years ago. we cannot meet them as my mothers family still do not know about this. my parents were upset at us finding out and have been understanding.My middle sister is coping fine but she has a family and career to keep her busy. My oldest sister, we have not told as do not think she would cope. we found out by accident as one of the girls daughters face booked us. my father has had some contact with them over the years only. I know no one is to blame and i eel for both my parents and the girls. I haven't really spoken to my father about it because it is still too painful. I have cried for 7 days solid and do not feel i can ever be the same person again. i feel all of my memories are not tainted --every good memory i have, i can't help think, oh when that happened, i wonder if my dad was thinking about his other daughter and i wonder what she was doing then. My life and my world has been turned upside down.I am angry at the grandaughter who messaged us because her mother and aunt had not told us in 40 years so what gave her the right? I am a bit angry at one of the girls (my fathers daughter) for showing up at family functions when we were there and putting my parents under a lot of stress.My father made it clear he wanted no contact and she could never be a part of the family. she befriended my aunts and started showing up. I feel she should have respected his wishes. He paid her maintenance and made sure she would have a good upbringing with her grand parents. he was very young at the time and it was her mother who divorced him.Anyway, i just wonder if anyone has any advice whatsover as to whether or not this pain will ever subside and will my relationship with my father(whom i used to be very close to ) will ever be the same?i feel like a light has gone out in me and will never return. family secrets are poisoness and i wish my parents had told us sooner but they somehow felt they couldn't...
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