Saying no to a placement

I completely understand staying within your own comfort zones and I think families should always put their current family first (whether its bio kids, adopted kids or a mix of both) when considering taking a new placement. I also don't discount gut feelings - I get them too and try to stay in-tune with what my mind/heart is trying to say to me, as well. That being said, I am a survivor of childhood sexual assault and a very similar situation to what you mentioned. My mother didn't believe me either, but I wasn't brave enough to keep 'moving up the chain of command' so-to-speak. I shut my mouth and endured another 5 steady years of abuse. I never accused anyone but the two perpetrators and never acted out sexually as a child. I did internalize and self injure as a late teen/early 20s, but I was NEVER a danger or threat to anyone else. I think about that now as an adult - how my life could have been different if I had gotten out of that situation early on. If I had people around me that didn't make me feel like I was a liar or damaged or gross or creepy. I am stable, happy and confidant now - almost 25 years after the start of it all - but it took me a loooong time to get there, because I had to endure it so long and had no support system after the fact. Being a survivor/victim of sexual abuse as a child does not automatically mean you are going to perpetrate your own abuse or false allegations. I hope you get a call soon with a child that is the right fit for your family. Good Luck! :)