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I was born when my bparents were young, they were 16 and 17. They ended up giving me to adoption. Yes, they partially figured it'd be best for me. But they both say that if their parents had been more supportive, they wouldn't've done it. I love my family, but I just reunited with both of my bparents this year. Ever since, I feel I am now closer to them than to my parents. I miss my b's more than my parents (I live away from home) and keep wishing I'd been raised by them, even though I'd possibly not be as well off. These feelings really surge recently whenever I visit home to see my parents and brother. After all my parents have done for me I know it's selfish to still long for a life with my biologicals but I can't seem to shake it off. Is this a common reaction to meeting them, something that will go away? The way I see it, there's nothing that beats being raised by natural parents. That's probably not true if your b's are alcoholics or incapable of raising you. But in my case, there was a chance it could have worked out fine, and I wish they'd taken that chance. Selfish thinking I know, bothers me.
Ramned,
It is something that is natural to wish for and it is important to recognise that it is okay to have conflicted feelings. Adoption is what causes these feelings that conflict with each other. It is finding peace that you have these feelings and that owning up to them does not take away from either family or your feelings about them. It just is what it is...and they do find their place inside of you and aren't as raw over time.
Kind regards,
Dickons
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Dickons
Ramned,
It is something that is natural to wish for and it is important to recognise that it is okay to have conflicted feelings. Adoption is what causes these feelings that conflict with each other. It is finding peace that you have these feelings and that owning up to them does not take away from either family or your feelings about them. It just is what it is...and they do find their place inside of you and aren't as raw over time.
Kind regards,
Dickons
That is true Dickons, I am trying to find that peace now. Like you Ramned, I have only just reunited with relatives and knowing what lovely kind people they are has given rise to very similar feelings.