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First of all Hello, this my first post! and i have a great story to tell..
So im 27, all ways known that I was an adopted, but never really thought about searching for my BM but know I would do it at sometime..this is because i all ways thought it was a long lengthy process that would take years!! but alas with the help of my adoptive dad! ( just to keep things clear) we headed off to Edinburgh ( live in Scotland and all the files i.e original birth certificates and court process papers are stored there-i live in Glasgow)
and all it took was 9 on the Train and that was me an hour later i had all the information! names, address ages so on so forth!.....
Now im not one for taking my time and with the info i had this was no exception, of course i looked up facebook and the likes but could not find anyone so look up google maps for the address and saw that the house had a name plate on it! so next day! i drove round just on the intention of "looking" which is ok of course your going to be curious! alas the name on the door was not my name! so i knocked on the next door! an old lady appeared " and proclaimed "My god you look like John" OFT i brushed this aside for the moment to ask if she know what happened to the persons who lived next door (being my BM) and would you know she said this "who they still live in there! "she stays with her Husband and 3 daughters now!" and you know this old woman know exactly who I was! ( Worst kept secret of the street ill let you know) wow what do i do now! i did not want to knock on her door or scare her so the best i could think of was to leave my name and number with my date of birth! and left! teary eyed of course ( this was too easy,id said this from the set off to get my records..its all too easy its being handed to me on a plate)
SO i drove off to a local shopping Mall was a great sunny day ! 10 mins later! a Txt came in and this was it said
"Hi Andy its....., I am shaking because you have been on my mind today, you all ways are when the sun is shining. i just missed you by 5 mins i never moved house i needed to make it easy for you to find me..plz txt back"
and with that my roller coaster ride really started never have i felt this type of love and bond for a woman that iv never met it was so debilitating it was scary but amazing at the same time!..after another txt i asked her to phone which she did we spoke for 20 mins solid! 2 days later i met her! 6 hours straight we sat in the mall and the Park talking and sharing photos it was all too easy! ...later that day i also met her sister which was great! i dont know what to expect from meeting them i know what i was wanting ( a relationship with my BM) i just did not know if she wanted the same but alas! she did she all so had great info on my father! and will be meeting him soon also as he wishes to meet me as well! she had great info but the main thing here for me was being able to see and feel that i looked like someone! not just 1 person but the entire family! sister and cousins included.!
So that the joyfull bit and everyone keep in mind thats not even a week and im sure alot of things could change and im sure they will but we txt everyday and talk on the phone and everyone wants to meet me ( no doubt being nosy lol) so i know this is not how it works for everyone! some adoptees will never want to meet there BM and Father or they might and it might be different than what they thought..it might not be the right thing for them or the right time! but if you feel it is do it! some people will take days weeks,months! before they actually speak let alone meet there BM !!but please when you are going to or even the lead up to the search have support from you friends but most of all your parents! because with out them you would not be here at this time and place with out them!
this weekend end i will meet my sisters ( half sisters but still blood) something iv never had! and it feels great to know they want to meet me and are very excited!
is it going to fast? well that really comes down to how strong you are and the other persons around you are i feel if it went any slower i would burst with Rainbows or something like that! because you really do feel the love(well i do).
Well i hope the "Rainbow" feelings last and that my relationship grows with my birth Mother and family! has long as there's support behind the both of you everything will be fine..
ty for letting me share this with all of you
cheers Andy Cats
Andy,
That is a fantastic story! I hope it just gets better, and better. I am a little short of 2 years in my reunion, and I've loved it.
I hope you keep posting and sharing. It's always nice to see the good stories! Congratulations!!
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Andy-- this is a WONDERFUL story and I always believe that it is a part of the adoption story-- a search. It would be nice if all adoptees, at a certain age, could easily access their files in order to see their history.
If you feel like it, please post an update on how everything went and goes in the future. I am also reuniting with my b_mom in the next months, though the situation is a bit more complicated.
Thank you for the great Messages!!
UPDATE - I have met my B/M another time since last Sat!..
This is because she only! lives 10 mins away from me! which i dont think i said last time time! would you believe it all these years iv passed her house going to work, going swimming!!..not only that She worked at the local Mall and now her daughter does for years! the one I all ways go to and as a child!....
I spoke with the older of 3 the sisters! that was great because i know she had reservations and felt really weird for her because she thought she was all ways my b/m Oldest! But i think she is slowly coming round.
At the start all so well just over a week ago when i made contact her husband was a bit worried all so which i understand completely but now even he has come round to the Idea of her meeting me on a regular time! ( Yet to meet him) But im sure over the Summer i will meet a bunch of new ppl! .
Im just so happy because you hear all the storys about B/m not wanting to meet there child or vice versa! or how a can of worms gets open! well sure there will be somethings but all you have to do is be open and honest..let me tell you my self and my B/M are so open and honest with each other its empowering (if i can use that) it really is great to open up to a woman that understands you! and you should not be scared to do this!
Cheers AC
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Hello. I am an adult adoptee who is planning to film a documentary about adoptees and their struggle to find members of their birth families. It will focus on the difficult search process, in terms of the material and psychological effects it has on the adoptee and their families.
In the production stage, we will be filming in Austin, Texas. We need your help, in a supportive way through getting the word out about what we are doing, writing letters to you state representatives and the white house, as well as your donations, both large and small.
If you would like to appear in the documentary, please send me a one-page synopsis of what has happened to you in your search and it must be so compelling that I could not turn you down.
Please visit our website at [url=http://www.newsfromnighteagle.com]NEWS FROM NIGHT EAGLE - Home[/url] for more information.
Hope to hear from you soon.
Carol Shoemaker, Director
Adult Adoptees: Second-Class Citizens (An Indy Film)
Diamond in the Rough Productions
A Carol Shoemaker Production
254 577-5958
This is a wonderful story. I was just notified about 8 hours ago that my b-father is wanting to reunite. He found my mother on FB and my parents called to tell me. During the conversation with my parents I was just kind of numb and didn't know how to react exactly. Thinking in my head. "wheres my script?". Since, I found his fb page and was kind of spying on him to get a little feel for him before I made a response. Im gonna put this out there for yall. I saw that he was talking about me like a proud father. Telling his nephew all about me and I guess he saw a picture of me from my FB account. He was describing my features and comparing me to his family members. Honestly I almost requested his friendship to tell him... "HEY those features are my mothers features not yours to claim!"... He and my mother were pregnant with me while she was still in high school. She chose not to be with him because of her own reasons, she kept me and I was adopted a few years later by my father. My family is my foundation of life, they are everything to me. I have always known "I was special" and adopted by my dad. I used to day dream as most children do, I even had a psychic tell me he was looking for me and had christmas gifts in the closet for me, and that he would contact me through the computer. Well, I guess she was right. He asked my mom to forward his information etc. I know I want to contact him, and my family is supportive. This all just is happening too fast, and I cant stop crying. I dont know what is wrong with me. I feel like I have always known him. I kept a letter he wrote me as an infant telling me he loves me and will always be my father etc. My therapists over the years have encouraged me to understand my abandonment issues. I am sitting in a whirlwind. I do feel better reading some of the posts, and kind of amazed that everyone kinda goes through the same emotions at this time. I need advice or support that will keep me from having an anxiety attack... I dont want all the excitement of a reunion and all the attention that comes with that. I am nervous, scared, a little numb, and mostly just surprised. Any help will be greatly appreciated from anyone, and this FUN HAPPY post is the kind of energy I need right now. I wrote a letter sent it to my mom first for evaluation and explained he has to prove to her he is who he says he is first and foremost and just told him basically, that I am who I am... I am a gay female and dont want to have to worry about that acceptance again in my life. The first time around was enough. LUCKILY I am the superstar of my family and can do no wrong!! LOL they all love me no matter what.... :) thanks you guys for anything.... LOVE AND HAPPY ENDINGS