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I let someone talk me into relaxing my 4-year-olds hair and I am so sad about it. I was up all night last night beating myself up for robbing her of her natural hair and basically altering her hair for the rest of her life. Wish I could turn back time and think about it more. Yes, it's straighter now and she loves having hair on her shoulder but it feels so unhealthy now. Anyone have any suggestions or advice?
Goodness... Don't do it again, wash and condition her hair regularly and trim the ends until its all grown out. I would probably keep it braided (not too tight).
Also, don't listen to that person ever again when it comes to hair... or probably anything else. But definitely not hair.
Sorry, I know you feel bad enough already... :(
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Don't beat yourself up, just condition it until the relaxer grows out...and as hard as it is, ESPECIALLY in a transracial adoption when everyone and their mother thinks they have the right to "counsel" you on your daughter's hair. Always remember that she is your daughter and that you have the right to make any decisions you want regarding her hair until she is old enough to make those decisions for herself. Don't let anyone bully you into thinking otherwise. Just give yourself a break, it will grow out and all will be well. Continue to educate yourself about style you like to see your daughter wear (my kids are very active, in the pool everyday, playing hard, so I do really simple styles) a lot of people don't like the styles my kids wear, but I don't care, they are my kids and they are happy and their hair is healthy so :) all is well. Just remember...your the momma, even if you feel you have made a mistake, the only person judging who is of any importance at all to your family is YOUR family :) The rest....ignore :)
Anivan it happens to the best of us. As an AA, my mom regretted placing a relaxer in the middle kiddos hair. The hair will grow out, and as said prior condition, and protect the hair. What I do suggest is research on a hair stylist that counsels, and takes care of natural hair.. as your DD transitions to her natural hair. The issue may be between the straight hair and the curlier new hair.. to avoid any unnecessary breakage. Hang in there.
Fe2002
Goodness... Don't do it again, wash and condition her hair regularly and trim the ends until its all grown out. I would probably keep it braided (not too tight).
Also, don't listen to that person ever again when it comes to hair... or probably anything else. But definitely not hair.
Sorry, I know you feel bad enough already... :(
Ditto...
Transitions back to natural can be rough... been there and done that and looked a hot mess in the process. The two textures will be at odds. Seek out a professional in natural haircare to help with the transition. Normally I would suggest flat-ironing until you gradually cut off the processed ends over time but she's just too young for that.
Hang in there.