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My husband and I are just beginning the process of foster/adopt and had a question for those of you who have been in this for awhile. I know breastfeeding a foster child would be out of the question, but has anyone given breastmilk to a foster child? Either your own pumped milk or from a donation?
Thanks
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I would bet that it's not going to be allowed. And seriously, if my newborn were going into fostercare, I'd be HUGELY offended if the fostermom tried to nurse or feed my baby breastmilk, unless it was mine. Breastmilk is best and I'm not arguing that point. But unless it's a newborn free or soon-to-be free for adoption, I'm opposed to donor milk being used.
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I know the answer you would get from my CW. She would look at you like you are the craziest nut in the world and tell you that you must take the state provided formula because they have a contract in place and that is what is required. If you wish to dispute this, then you will have file a petition with medical documentation for your request. Seriously. We have had 2 infants and were told that we could only use the exact formula that the state had a contract for and nothing else even if we bought it ourselves.
Even if the biomom pumped it, it could be dangerous if she is ingesting something inappropriate (such as drugs or psychiatric medication) or has a disease (such as HIV) that passes through breast milk and was unaware of the danger. At least the donor milk from a milk bank is screened. Even so, the cw would most likely never approve it and would think you were crazy for not just giving the child formula like everyone else.
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Donated breastmilk sounds dangerous to me too. I would never consider that. A lot of people say breastmilk is better for babies, but formula babies seemed to do just fine. I think it might be a big ordeal, having the bio mom sign that it's ok, and then she signs saying it's ok, and then bio mom might say you are trying to kill the baby or something. Maybe after adoption is finalized, and the baby is still in age to be breastfed, but highly unlikely as adoption usually doesn't occur til after 1 year or longer. Good luck though!
MamaDeb
My husband and I are just beginning the process of foster/adopt and had a question for those of you who have been in this for awhile. I know breastfeeding a foster child would be out of the question, but has anyone given breastmilk to a foster child? Either your own pumped milk or from a donation?
Thanks
I have a biomom that, for the first 6 months of this childs life, would pump.. and store it and then get it to us.
I applaude her efforts.. but.. when it got to us most of it was thawing or leaking or something. We rarely ended up giving it to FS.. the caseworker agreed with our decision to accept it.. but not feed it to the baby. Biomom had the best of intentions, but her mindset and follow through was a little off.
I know feeding a foster child donated breast milk is not allowed here (neither is our own pumped milk), but even if it were, I would not give any baby donated breast milk unless it came from a milk bank and was thoroughly tested. I also would not give a foster baby breast milk pumped by the bio-mother because I have no control over what substances she is putting into her body (legal or illegal), whether she is drinking, of if she is following a healthy diet for breast feeding. It just wouldn't be worth the risk to me for the marginal benefits of breast milk.
I work as a nurse for infants and we had a foster mom be assigned to one of our patients. I was showing her how to feed the baby (had special needs) and how to mix the formula and she looks at the baby and goes, "Its okay. I know you don't like it. When you get home I'll give you breastmilk." You should have seen my eyes. I proceeded to ask her where the breastmilk was from and all that, as we use donor milk but its been screened by a bank much like blood donations. She said she purchases it off a website from strangers. I explained to her why that wouldn't be appropriate, especially seeing as how this is not legally her child and you bet your butt I called my unit SW. The SW talked with CPS and that foster mom didn't have her license revoked she simply had a stern talking to. Somehow, I think she is probably doing it anyway.
Like others have said, I personally would not feel comfortable feeding untested breastmilk to my own kids. If it came from a milk bank, absolutely I see no issue. But, these are ultimately others' kids.
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Banked milk around here is very expensive, and it is heated for pasteurization, so it is like drinking cows milk and is not as easily digested. The good bacteria, and most of what is great about breast milk is lost.
Some moms can pump, but both of our newborns came to us because of drugs, so pumping was not an option.
FWIW, I BFed all three of my kids and one has asthma and one is a cancer survivor, so breast milk is not going to keep kiddo healthy if that is the hope.
It never hurts to ask, but know that formula fed kiddos will be no worse off than BFed babies.