Help

My husband and I adopted 4 of his sister's kids from foster care. We signed a post-adoptive agreement and have even allowed visits with his sister, even though they are not part of the agreement. We have had them for 2 years officially and ever since the adoption we have had a huge problem with them contacting their mom via the internet and she them. Today we found unauthorized emails between the 14 year old and her mom talking about how we will never be her parents and she is going to move in with her mom when she is 18. Their mom is constantly saying this to them, despite the fact that she can't hold down a job or even properly care for herself. She also bashes us and preys on their teenage emotions by being the shoulder to cry on. She doesn't care about the negative effect she has on them and selfishly just poisons them against us. It's heartbreaking and discouraging. I have no idea how to talk to my kids about this and I really need to find a way to protect them from her without making them feel like I don't understand why they love her and why they need a relationship with her. I am at my wits end and really need some help. I know I'm not a perfect parent and I don't always keep my cool, but I am trying.