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Well to start off.. I am 14 weeks, and I have two children.. Also married to the father. So this would be my third pregnancy..My husband is the only one working now. We moved to another state, so I had to quit my job. My decision is wanting to give this baby to someone that can support he/she. Because right now we couldn't. I love my two children, but could not see havin another one. But, my parents are makin me feel so guilty about the decision. They want us to keep the child and raise him/her. Or give the child to them. They are in worst shape than we are.. I guess I'm trying to get some advice of how I should break it down to my parents. Because they don't want to accept my decision.. Can someone help me?
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Please get real counseling about this... I mean real counseling not an agency worker. I have found that a lot of women place because of similar situations and really regret it later on. Adoption can be a great thing however I would hate to see you place for just financial reasons. If this is what you really want you will have to just tell your parents that it is what it is... With that said you are still very early in your pregnancy. My best advice is to take the next few months. Look at all your options. Try to get to a place that should you want to parent that you are able. If you still feel placement is best then at least you can go into it knowing that it was the right choice for you. Best of luck and please feel free to pm me if you want to talk.
You are still very early in your pregnancy... I strongly encourage you to use this time to get yourself into a better financial situation.... Prepare for all your options and really look into this. THings to keep in mind. Money comes and goes. There is no guaranteeing that should you choose an open adoption that it will remain open. Also keep in mind that your children will grieve this loss too. Adoption is an option but you are still so early. Right now is the time to really look at everything. The more ethical agencies won't want to work with you until you are much further along in your pregnancy. Ideally not until your eight month or so. That way you have taken your time to really consider if this is what's best. Also please get counseling. Adoption is hard. Even when people feel that it was the right choice it is hard. Best of luck and please feel free to PM. me. I am always happy to talk.
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I would agree with the above poster, Seek real counselling. Understand that adoption DOES effect people who are in your family. It has been a year since my husband and I have have gotten custody of our daughter and I can still tell that her maternal grandparents struggle with the adoption at times. My daughter's Birth grandparents are still and always will be a huge part of her life, they are still called "Ninna and pawpaw." Although I know they are happy for us and for my daughter, I think maybe they still beat themselves up on "what it would have been if their daughter had chosen to parent our daughter, or if they should have opted to parent her" It's completely understandable. BUT, it will be your life, and your husband and children's life most effected by adoption if you chose to go that route. Adoption can be a beautiful beautiful thing, just make sure you are at peace with whatever you decide and understand that other family member will eventually come to terms with it as well. Best wishes! :)
Dear Jamie, I am a woman who is know sitting on the opposite side of the adoption fence. I had my first child very young and had great parents who helped a lot. I let them adopt her when she was 5 but in my circumstances my parents were very wealthy and could give her all that they gave me as a child. 9 years later I was married and had my second child. ( my hubby and I met when my daughter was 3.5 y/o) I know in my heart I did the right thing. Now 13 years after our son was born we are going the adoption way, (emergancy hysterectomy at sons birth) so Ican truly relate to your feelings. My name is Michelle and if you just need an ear to listen or anything please email me. Grtshell@gmail.com