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Hello, I am new to the forum and this is my first post. I have been looking around the forum but have not been able to find the answers to two quesitons that I had. I was hoping someone could help me.
1. What questions were asked to your references? The agency I am choosing requires 4 references that they will call. One reference will need to come to the offices in person. I just wanted to know what they may ask? I read that your best friend may not always be the best person to choose. I wasnt sure why this we recommended so any help with that would be appreciated.
2. I know a medical exam is required. Is this a specific exam? Meaning are they looking for something specific like a GYN exam or is this just a regular physical such as you would get yearly at your general doctor?
Thanks so much!
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I can only tell you what our experience was. Our agency sent written reference forms that asked about our personality, what kind of parents we will be, how our marriage is, etc. The physical form we had to have filled out was crazy. It had general health questions, blood tests, gyn results, tb test, etc. However, each agency is different and has different forms and questions.
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My experience re: references was pretty similar. All four of mine had to do written forms; these asked about things like my personality, strengths/ weaknesses, what they knew of my experience/ relationships with kids, support system, etc. One had to meet with the social worker in person, and I think the questions were pretty similar, but more in-depth of a conversation. As far as why your best friend may not be the best person, it probably depends on your relationship with your best friend. Two of my references were some of my closest friends, because they have experience with me with children, they support and have knowledge of adoption, and they could actually speak to the questions on the forms. If you haven't seen the reference forms, I would ask the social worker if you can see a copy, then think about who would have the most knowledge of you in the areas they ask about.I had homestudies done by two different agencies (the first one closed while I was "waiting" so I had to switch). The first one just needed a regular doctor's appointment (not even a full physical), and it pretty much consisted of a one-page form that the doctor signed attesting to my general state of health and ability to raise a child. It was fairly useless, in my opinion. The second agency had a several page long form that included everything from a regular physical plus pap results, std testing, urinalysis, tb test, documentation of a discussion about fertility issues and whether infertility was an issue, diabetes, cholesterol, and a bunch of other test results, and an estimate of my life expectancy based on that day's visit. The exam needed to have been done within 6 months, and since I was not due for a physical on my health insurance, I had to pay out of pocket. The doctor said it was the most ridiculous form he had ever seen. I'm guessing most agencies fall somewhere in between those two.